Death Note Redux
by Rose White007
Summary: Yagami Haruka has her own ambitions, but when her twin, Light, begins behaving in strange & frighting ways she finds herself joining a dangerous game. Romance, mystery and confusion abound as she attempts to save Light from himself while falling in love with the strangest man she's ever met. Light X OC X L, AU, Editing!
1. Rebirth

**Disclaimer:** **I don't own Death Note the manga, the anime, the movies or anything that makes money for the creators of Death Note.** **There is no money involved here and there never will be. This is applicable to all chapters of this FANfiction.**

 **Death** **Note** **(** **デスノート** **)** **is a Japanese manga series written by Tsugumi Ohba and illustrated by Takeshi Obata.** **It was adapted into an anime,** **movies, collectables, etc** **.**

 _ **A/N: This is based on the anime NOT the manga.**_

 _ **I would like to point out a mistake in the First Episode of Death Note. After Light is home with the Note, about to make his first kill, we see his digital alarm clock. The clock tells us the date is 11/28 THU. The anime is set in the year 2006. November 28, 2006 was actually a Tuesday, not a Thursday. I've done as much research as I can to get dates for what happens throughout the anime (watching the episodes carefully).**_

 _ **Be advised that this is an AU (Alternate Universe) fanfiction so it will eventually veer off into it's own storyline entirely. If you haven't watched the anime you might want to because I won't be expending much effort to explain what's going on with Light; I'm assuming you already know or can easily find out.**_

 _ **Each chapter takes place within the parameters of the episode it's named after (until I say otherwise).**_

 _ **I'll be using some Japanese terms throughout because they better convey certain things.**_

 _ **This story is already complete (HOLY OH MY GOSH) and will be updated when I feel like. If you enjoy it and want the next chapter, make me feel like it by reviewing and putting DNR on your favorites list.**_

 _ **Rated 'M' for mature audiences only! ¡INCEST WARNING!**_

 _Chapter 1_

 _Rebirth_

When Yagami, Light returned home that evening he made a beeline for the staircase, his thoughts racing. It was ridiculous to think it could be possible, obviously it could not. A 'Death Note'? A notebook that someone could write a name in and _kill_ the intended? No way.

He'd seen the book fall while he was in class, it was still on the lawn when the day ended. He would have left it, maybe he should have, but his curiosity had gotten the better of him. Anyway, why leave it? There was no point in that. At the very least he could recycle it properly.

And if it was real... Well, he knew it was nonsense, but if it _was_...

"Light."

He paused on the stairway, registered the voice, and stepped off the landing into the open living room doorway. "Ah, Haruka. Sorry, I didn't even see you there."

"Oh? So, you weren't purposely ignoring me?"

"Of course I wasn't. I just have a lot on my mind right now."

She could practically feel the warmth he exuded. It was almost entirely false; that meant he was hiding something. "A lot on your mind, huh. 'A lot' of what?"

"Well, exams are coming up soon–"

"Please! Like you're worried about exams. I don't believe that for a second. If you really are on edge over exams the rest of us have no hope at all!" Her brother was incredibly intelligent, but he'd never been able to pull the wool over her eyes. "Anyway, you're home a little later than usual."

"Yeah, I kind of got distracted on the way back."

"The same distraction that made you miss your twin even though the I'm right in line with the door? Must be something amazing... It's not a girl is it?"

"What? No, no of course not."

She turned away, picking up the remote and hiding a smirk. She'd caught him off guard with that one. "Tch, boring. Sayu will be disappointed. Well, whatever, go and be boring alone then."

Light considered her profile; his vantage point was perfect for this task. Truly they could not be mistaken for mere acquaintances, they were obviously related and most were observant enough to peg them as twins. Fraternal obviously, though a few of their duller 'friends' had asked if they were identical.

No, not everyone could be an intellectual, but was it really possible to be _that_ stupid?

Even those unobservant few recognized them as relatives. They had the same shades of hair, very similar facial structure, and shared eye color. The biggest difference between them, gender aside, was Haruka's long, thick mane of curls; a genetic trait passed down through the generations, from a great-grandmother on their father's side, that hadn't been seen in the family for decades. She'd lamented the gift in her early years, tangles and broken brushes were the norm, but as she'd grown older and more able to handle her hair on her own, she became fond her individuality.

Yes, his sister and he were much alike, but they were also undeniably distinct. Though they both had the capacity to be effortlessly popular, Haruka had put more work into that facet of her life than he. She _very much_ cared about the opinions of others. Where he was studious, reaching the top of the nation in academics, she hung back. Hovering around the Better Than Average mark. Light enjoyed setting an academic example for his classmates, while Haruka wanted to be within the crowd, or perhaps a little bit apart.

She liked to be different, but not _too_ different.

He'd always wondered about that decision of hers. Why stand with the rest when she could lead them from above? Generally he wasn't troubled by her life choices, but this one plagued him. He could not identify her motivations, but he was sure there was more to it than wanting to be crowned Most Popular Girl.

"Haruka, I really didn't mean to–"

"I know." She did not do him the courtesy of speaking to him directly, choosing instead to keep her eyes on the television.

"No, listen, I really–"

"I _know,_ Light. Just drop it. Go to your room and study like you do every evening. Be sure to leave for your supplemental classes on time!"

She heard him ascend to the second flood, after a moment of debating whether he should attempt to say more, and scoffed as her mother moved through the area toward the kitchen.

"Was that Light I heard?"

"Who else would it have been?"

"Don't be rude, Haruka."

" _Sorry_."

"I'm not sure she really meant that," Sachiko murmured, but she didn't pursue the conversation. Her second child had been in a particularly foul mood lately. She knew the cause, but there was little she could do to remedy the situation. Instead of beginning an argument that would end with Haruka stiffly and silently leaving for her own room, she took a seat on the sofa and asked, "Do you remember how you came to be here? You were such a surprise! Such a special blessing."

Her daughter rolled her eyes. "You've told me a thousand times, Mom."

The older woman continued as if the girl hadn't spoken. "Imagine it! Twins! We had no idea we would get two for the price of one. How you hid from the ultrasound machine I'll never know. I had more than the usual number of visits, your father and I were rather nervous first timers!" She laughed at the memory. "I don't think we could have been more stunned when the doctor told me to keep pushing! Ah, but I couldn't have been happier to have both of you in my arms safe and well."

Yes, the surprise baby narrative. Haruka had heard it before. Though she tried to keep up the angsty teenager bit she could feel the facade slipping; she could never stay upset when this memory was brought up. How could she, when her mother spoke with such love?

They sat together for a while, side by side, until the third and youngest child, Sayu, came into the space.

"Oh," she said knowingly. "I bet Mom told the twin story again."

"Indeed I did," Sachiko stood and straightened her calf-length skirt. "Well, it's time to start supper. Sayu," she added as the brown-haired fourteen year old took a seat on the floor in front of the television, "Please try not to get so worked-up over your shows."

"I can't make any promises about that. Hideki-kun is so great!"

Haruka obliged her sister by changing the channel. A drama starring Sayu's celebrity crush was airing re-runs in a lead up to a premier of his new show. Though he'd only had the role of a side character in the first, brought on to boost appeal when ratings were dropping, he was the lead in the new drama. His initial claim to fame came from a singing career.

Personally Haruka didn't find the man attractive. His hair was dyed, he often wore color contacts and his acting skills were mediocre at best. Sure he was also a singer, but she wasn't impressed by his vocal range either. None of that mattered to Sayu though.

"Wahh," she sighed. "Isn't he so amazing?"

"He's something, but 'amazing' isn't the word that comes to my mind."

"Why can't there be anyone like him in my class?!"

/~/~/~/~/

"Light! It's already six thirty, you know. Don't you have cram school tonight?"

"Yeah, I'll be ready in just a 'sec."

He descended the stairs, bag over his shoulder and thoughts miles away, though not so far gone that he didn't think to be polite and bid his family farewell.

"I'm leav–"

"It's not fair!" Sayu was already speaking. She was sitting on the lounge, her older sister's head in her lap. "How'd you get so lucky with the curls? Your hair is so unique! I bet that's why it was so easy for you to get, hmpf!" Her speech was interrupted by a hand clamping over her mouth.

Though Sayu'd failed to notice Light, Haruka had not.

"Easy for her to get what? Sayu?"

Feeling like a deer caught in the headlights of an oncoming car Sayu looked to her sister, to her brother, and back again.

Having gained the undivided attention of her younger sibling Haruka removed her hand and mimed slitting her throat in warning.

"Uh, easy for her to get... Nothing. Girl stuff. You wouldn't understand. Actually, you don't even want to know. Trust me."

He didn't believe what she said, but his accusation was cut off by their mother. "Light, shouldn't you be going? You'll be late."

"Yeah. I'm leaving now."

A chorus of "Be safe"s followed him out the door, though the voice he listened for was noticeably absent.

/~/~/~/~/

"Sayu come and sit down now."

"Only if I can leave the TV on!"

"Sayu this is not the time for an argument–"

"Right, so just let it stay on."

Soichiro had not returned in time for the family meal; had her father been there Sayu would have come to the table without any fuss.

The other two were already seated.

"Sayu!"

"Please? I really, _really_ love this episode! Besides, it's not like we have anything different to talk about."

Their mother, who was not keen on fighting this battle, conceded defeat. "Fine, fine! But come and eat before the food gets cold."

A usual dinner with the usual side dishes, though served later than normal. In hopes of her husband returning in time Sachiko had delayed formally serving supper. Light had insisted he would be fine stopping at a convenience store; still, she would keep plates warm for the both of them.

"Itadakimasu."

The room was quiet for several minutes. Sayu remained fixated on the television while her family ate in silence. It wasn't until Haruka mentioned having an appointment the next day that conversation began.

"Ah, I just remembered. I think I'll miss dinner tomorrow. I have a shoot right after school."

 _Clatter, clang._

"What?! No way! Another one so soon!? Lucky! Do you know what it's for yet?"

"I'll keep a plate for you."

"Thanks Mom. Sayu, it's for spring inspired accessories on a retail website. The agency said this company saw the shots from the first shoot I did."

"W-O-W! You're really hitting the big time, Onee-chan!"

"I don't know about that. It's just a little internet based shop, all handmade things so–"

"No, really! That's two in a month! I bet everything will snowball from here. So exciting! I can't wait for people to notice you on the street. Imagine someone asking for an autograph?" She clapped her hands together. "Do you think if I hang around the shopping center I'll be scouted too?"

"Even if you were," Sachiko interrupted. "You wouldn't be allowed to do it."

"Aw, but _Mother_..."

"Don't 'Mother' me! The only reason your father allowed it with your sister was because her grades are decent and she's promised to keep them up. Any slipping and she'll have to put this whole thing on hold. Your grades are barely hanging by a thread."

Haruka snorted as Sayu looked to her for support. "I can't defend you there, Imōto. You're easily distracted as it is. I really don't think your school work can afford to suffer anymore than it already does."

"What? That's so mean!"

"Besides, it's not as easy as you think. After this job I'll have enough money to get a decent camera and lighting equipment so I can start working on a blog to help build up my image. Because the agency is so small they're really insistent on self-promotion. This is a lot more work than you think it is. I don't even have a manager and unless I start getting a lot of offers the agency won't provide one."

"I could totally be your manager!"

She shook her head at Sayu's one track mentality. "Is that really all you got out of what I just told you?"

"No," she huffed. "I heard you, but I still think I could be some help."

"I'm not saying you can't help. I might need a second opinion on photos I take and things like that."

Sayu whooped and nearly toppled backward as the front legs of her chair left the floor, almost vibrating with excitement. "I can't wait to tell—Oh wait. Never mind."

Haruka bit back a frown. "Yes. Put that thought out of your head. No one's telling Light a thing about it."

"He's going to find out eventually, you know. Won't he be mad you never told him?"

Scoffing, "I doubt it and if he wants to be upset with someone he can take a look in the mirror. He's being unobservant."

"That really isn't fair to your brother, Haruka. I wish you wouldn't hold onto anger the way you do."

"It isn't _anger_ , just annoyance."

Truth be told this was turning out to be more of a punishment inflicted on herself than Light. It hurt her to keep secrets from him, especially something as important as this; she couldn't remember ever hiding an accomplishment, or a failure for that matter, from him. That wasn't to say she hadn't tried, but it was impossible to do. He'd always known everything about her.

Barely four weeks ago, at the end of October, she'd been out with friends after school. They were windowing shopping when she was approached by a well dressed woman who introduced herself as Kinomoto, Asami, a representative of the Float Agency. Business card at the ready, and a pamphlet in hand, she'd complimented Haruka's 'look' before explaining that she was a talent recruiter. The teen agreed to think the offer over and brought the information to her parents.

Of course her father had insisted on completing a thorough background check on Kinomoto-san and the company before even considering the possibility. In the end everything checked-out and he, reluctantly, signed a parental consent form; he wouldn't have done it if not for the prodding of his wife who thought it a good opportunity, something singular to put on a college application.

One long meeting and a non-binding contract later, supervised by her father and his lawyer, Haruka was officially signed with Float Agency.

Her first job came the second week of November and it was an eye-opener to say the least. It wasn't that she'd thought it would be easy, but at the same time she hadn't been prepared for the hot lights, the time on her feet and all the clothing changes. Still she thought it interesting and, like her mother had said, it was good to have something like this on her resume.

That and it was a giant step in the direction of advancing personal ambitions.

She'd thought to tell her siblings at the same time, but chances came and went without Light seeming to notice anything out of the ordinary.

That was idiotic. She was gone far more often than ever before; there were many meetings to be had and trainings to go to in those first few weeks, yet he never said anything. He asked no questions. He didn't seem to care.

So, she dropped the bomb on Sayu over dinner one night when Light decided to take the meal in his room while he studied. It had been a rash decision to swear her family to secrecy, but she wasn't about to take it back. If Light didn't see what was happening then he had no one but himself to blame.

This only cemented her belief that they were drifting apart, faster and further than she would have thought possible. She'd noticed it at the start of summer break. If he wasn't studying then he was out with his own friends, sparing her only passing comments and fleeting glances.

Jealous? Of course she was and she felt no shame in admitting it, at least to herself. It was her jealously that led her to keep secrets from him, half hoping he would care enough to figure it all out _and_ be very hurt by it when he did.

Yes, she was wishing emotional pain on her brother and no, she didn't see anything wrong with that. He would deserve whatever karma threw at him.

"Still, that's really not nice at all, Onee-chan. It's not like Onii-chan is doing it on purpose."

Haruka took a final bite of fried shrimp and cleared her dishes from the table. She had no use for this conversation. Nothing they said would change her mind and there was no reason to dwell on it.

"Hey!"

Though Sayu protested loudly Haruka would not return the television to the previous channel.

/~/~/~/~/

He was shocked. Awed. Incredulous.

It had worked. The Death Note was real.

Just as he'd specified Shibimaru, Takuo had died an accidental death mere seconds after his name was written; in this case he was hit by a truck. The filth had been about to sexually assault a young woman in full view of anyone walking by. Even so, the cowards of the world would have let it happen and the other men in Shibimaru's group were just fine participating.

Trading one life for another and who knew how many more lives the scum would have ruined? The same for that hostage taker; he could have killed those children. What were the police doing? Trying to _negotiate_ , to _talk_ to the criminal, and for what? To put him in jail for a few years before unleashing him upon the public once more?

He couldn't stand to watch the world fall into ruin. Apathy. Violence. Depravity. The earth was a rotten place, but now... Now, he could do something about it. He could change the course of history and make the world a better, safer place for all those who tried to live good lives.

This was his destiny.

/~/~/~/~/

Sayu was in a state of bliss when Light returned. He could hear her rapturous praise of her idol from the moment he walked in the house.

"Welcome home, Light," his mother greeted. "Don't mind her."

He wondered which 'her' she referred to. Really, she could be speaking of either one of his sisters.

He put his annoyance aside in favor of playing the good son. "Don't worry, I won't be bothered by something as small as this. Actually, Mom, I was wondering if you could answer a question for me?"

The older woman looked surprised. "I can't remember the last time you had something serious to ask me! It must be important."

He smiled, looked contrite. "Kind of. It's just, Sayu was saying something earlier, but Haruka cut her off. I was wondering if you knew what they'd been speaking of."

"Ah," she gave him an apologetic look. "I think I might, but the truth is– Well, don't think badly of us, Light, but she's made us all promise not tell you."

He had no trouble deciphering whom she spoke of this time.

"I see. Thanks for telling me that much," he began his trek up the stairs, pausing to add, "You know, she'll be upset with you too if she finds you said even that much."

"That's assuming she doesn't already know!" She put a hand to her cheek. "That girl, though she came from my body I really can't tell what she's thinking most of the time. Sometimes I wonder if she's actually matured at all or if she's still about nine years old."

/~/~/~/~/

Haruka eventually relented and Sayu had been able to watch the premiere of Ryuga, Hideki's new drama not once, but twice because they replayed the first episode after the local news.

"That was so great!" she squealed. "Hideki-kun has to be the best actor in this generation!"

"Not even close."

"Aw, don't be such a downer. You're in the minority on this one. You just don't understand how everyone else sees him."

She couldn't argue with that. Ryuga was incredibly popular as of late and, for the life of her, Haruka couldn't see the appeal. If his idol status had been regulated to girls in Sayu's age group she might have better understood, but the fact was that he was a favorite of older teens and housewives as well.

No. Haruka didn't understand how Hideki held such influence over so many people and just thinking about it set her to grinding her teeth. She couldn't stand it! How was that fair? What had he done to deserve that power?

Though she despised the man she would remiss if she dismissed him entirely. It would be a folly to allow her frustration to blind her to what lay behind his mask.

She needed to spend more time thinking on this.

"I'm headed to bed now. Sayu, don't stay up too late."

"Yeah, yeah. The show's over anyway. Goodnight, Onee-chan!"

"Goodnight, Imōto-chan."

To the second floor she went, her eyes tracing the cracks around her brother's door. There was no light to be seen, could he be in bed already?, yet as she pressed her ear to the entrance she could make out the faint taping of his fingers on the keyboard.

She thought of knocking, didn't do it, and went to her own room instead. She didn't owe him anything; especially considering the fact that she was near certain he'd gotten some kind of information out of their mother.

A snort escaped her as the door closed. She'd heard his voice in the hall, mingled with her mother's. Though she hadn't been able to make out what was said they'd spoken for longer than necessary and there was only one thing for Light to talk to their mother about right now.

Still, she didn't think he knew the full extent of it; until Sayu cracked, she was the weakest link in the chain, her secret would remain.

/~/~/~/~/

She did miss dinner the next night. Not that she minded, it was actually a relief to not have to _not_ talk to Light.

School days were fine. Though they both attended Daikoku Private Academy their class assignments were different; Haruka had no trouble avoiding him there and he never sought her out anymore. They traveled in different social circles so she had little worry of his overhearing anything compromising.

Her friends walked with her partway to the studio, chattering over each other as they gushed about being close to a celebrity. She laughed it off, waved away their praises, and flushed as they called her humble, admonishing her to take more pride in herself and her accomplishments.

All things she wanted them to say.

"Haruka-chan," Hirano, Minna looped her arm through that of her friend's. "I was wondering what you thought I should do about that test next week. You know I'm no good with the subject!"

"Haruka-chan," Yamaguchi, Sakura spoke up. "I need your advice about something too."

"So do I!" Yoshino, Yuuki interjected.

The conversation was a lively one and they parted ways, waving goodbye to one another, as they reached the station. Haruka was the only one in need of this transport today.

Her ride passed uneventfully, though she was suspicious of the wandering gaze of a man several seats away. He didn't approach, but she watched him warily from the corner of her eye.

She arrived at the location early, as she'd planned to, and was immediately greeted by an assistant photographer and the person who owned the items to be on the display.

"I'm really grateful you took this position, Yagami-san."

She ducked her head in thanks. "I'm also grateful that you thought of me for it! Thank you for this opportunity."

Makeup bag in hand she got to work brightening her face. She was not enough of a star to warrant any kind of assistance, though the staff seemed impressed by her easy acceptance of the situation.

"We've seen a lot of new talents let it go to their heads," someone explained.

"True. They act like they own the place!"

"It's really amateurish of them, but maybe it just depends on the person? Like, how mature they are?"

The only comments Haruka made on that subject pertained to herself and the fact that she believed she needed to represent her agency well.

"You've only been doing this for a short time right, Haruka-chan?" They'd moved to familiar terms quickly. "It's great that you're so professional already!"

What would they have said, she wondered, if they knew what I was really doing?

"Okay! Haruka, this is the first set! Oh, and here, I brought you a bottle of water. You must need a drink by now right?"

"Ah, thank you so much, Satsumi-san!"

A necklace, earrings and a purse. They were nice enough, perhaps not something she would wear on a regular basis though. They seemed a bit dressy.

She stood before the cameras, followed the directions she was given, and they soon moved onto the next collection of items.

This continued for two hours. In that time Haruka met several personal goals and by the end of it thought the day well spent. She was even offered one of the bags she'd modeled and accepted it with all grace and humility before being sent off with well wishes and a few unsolicited promises that comments would be made on her behalf to others in the industry.

"We really need more people like you around. It's great to work with someone who isn't full of themselves!"

They did not see the smirk that came to her lips as she walked away from the building.

/~/~/~/~/

"HEY! Onee-chan is back and with a _new bag_!"

"Here Sayu," she passed it off. "You can have this."

"Seriously?!"

"Sure," a shrug.

The fourteen year old hugged her new accessory to her chest. "This is great! I didn't know this kind of thing happened in real life."

/~/~/~/~/

A small website specializing in handmade accessories saw a spike in orders over the next several weeks. They attributed this to the photo campaign they'd run with images of a new model, but, though that was a factor, it was minor in comparison to the power that the words of one teenage girl could have.

Sayu had bragged endlessly about her newly acquired bag to the quiet envy of her classmates, who in turn wanted similar items. She was easily persuaded to tell them where they could find products made by the same company.

/~/~/~/~/

 _Dingdong_.

"Finally!"

The specialty lighting and camera were delivered Saturday evening.

Haruka had spent the last few days working on setting up the layout of her blog. She'd paid for a domain name though a website building service that billed itself easy-to-use. She was no tech wizard, but she did have aesthetic sense and it was surprisingly simple to make the site look the way she wanted it to.

The color scheme was chosen, the font type as well, and she'd used editing software to create an attractive banner. She'd spent some time browsing self-run websites of other models, looking at their layouts and trying to find out what drew users to them; they were all simplistic, photo based, and easy to navigate.

She applied those rules to her own site and felt that she'd done all she could with it.

"Hello? Ah, Satsumi-san! This is Haruka from– Oh! You remember me? Ah-ha, yes well, I just had a question for you..."

Her request was readily granted. Satsumi was glad to place a link to the model's website on her storefront page. In fact, she'd been asked a few times in emails if there was a place to find out more about the model in the photographs.

This exposure allowed Haruka to gain one hundred subscribers before she posted her first picture.

/~/~/~/~/

Ryuk arrived in the human world on December 3, 2006.

/~/~/~/~/

Haruka noted the whispers of neighbors as she and Sayu walked to a park with the camera Sunday morning after breakfast. They were speaking about the recent deaths of the world's most hardened criminals. It was uncanny, they said, too many for it to be a coincidence. Some were speculating that the government was somehow involved, that a coalition of the world's leaders had banded together and planned it all.

Other's a had a different take. They thought it was punishment sent by God Himself. It was too strange to be something done by a mere human. Even the government, as powerful as it was, couldn't pull something like this off.

Sayu had little to say about the matter; she was not well versed on current events despite their father's position with the police force, but Haruka supposed her sister, if pressed for an answer, would not support this kind of vigilante action.

Haruka knew nothing more about it than anyone else. Honestly, though she'd extended some thought to the topic, she cared little. She expected to be forewarned if anything tragic was coming to her household and if the sign came she would do everything in her power to stop it.

"Okay Sayu, your first day as photographer. Don't try too hard, I just want them to look natural."

"Right, so can I tell everyone I took these?"

"Whatever you want as long as they're usable. Remember, the theme here is simplicity. This is just a 'Daily Look' shoot and really it's more for your practice. After this I'm thinking we'll use the yard for most of the pictures."

She'd taken Sayu on as an employee. She was to be paid in products rather than money whenever possible, as per her request and as Haruka had anticipated.

Her family was predictable. Perhaps it was because they were related, but Haruka had never had any trouble foreseeing the actions of those in her household. The only one she couldn't always rely on to behave in honesty was Light, but again, she expected that of him. It took a certain amount of consciously applied skepticism to see through his Mr. Perfect act, but lately even she was having trouble discerning the hidden meaning within his actions.

 _Something_ was going on, of that she was certain, but she had no idea what it could be.

 **Death Note Facts**

It is a common misconception among the Shinigami that the king creates each Death Note. He does not.


	2. Confrontation

_**A/N:**_ _ **Please note that f**_ _ **or this chapter I went back to re-watch the**_ _ **2**_ _ **nd**_ _ **E**_ _ **pisode to see if there was a clock shot and there is, but the date it shows is December 1. Ryuk showed up**_ _ **five**_ _ **days after he dropped the Death Note (he says so himself) and that would make his arrival date December 3... WHO THE H WAS IN CHARGE OF DRAWING THE CLOCK IN LIGHT'S ROOM, HUH?**_ _ **WAS IT**_ _ **THAT**_ _ **HARD?**_ _ **^!*#)$ & Rant over.**_

 _ **I've done my best to make my own Death Note Anime Timeline.**_

 _Chapter 2_

 _Confrontation_

Sayu had finally broken down.

"Tsshh...," she hissed as she bit down too hard on her thumb. A bad habit, biting at her fingers when she was upset; she couldn't help it though. It had been a while since she'd done this, she wasn't one to get stressed out over things, but _this_ was too much.

All she'd wanted was help with her homework! How had he turned it around like that!? What sort of magician was he anyway?

"Huh? Weird. Hey, Light! What's goin' on? Why's your door locked?"

She should have stopped there, turned around and gone back to her room.

"What is it?" he'd asked.

"Can you help me with my homework?"

Stupid quadratic equations! Stupid Haruka for not being any good with math either!

"I'm like the only person in my class who doesn't get this stuff," she'd strolled into his room, passed the bed and sat at his desk, like she didn't have a care in the world.

And then he struck.

Halfway through the assignment, just when she thought they were making good progress, he started asking about Haruka.

She tried to brush him off, to lie her way out of it, but he could see through all that.

"I can't tell you!" she'd finally exclaimed. "I promised I wouldn't!"

Truthfully she was a little bit afraid of what he might do, but she was more worried about what Haruka would _definitely_ do. Light could keep his feelings to himself, he was the mature one. Haruka wore her heart on her sleeve; when she was mad everyone knew it. She had no qualms about making her displeasure known. Often times the thought of what was coming was worse than what she actually did and Sayu wholeheartedly believed her sister worked that way on purpose.

Still, Sayu thought she should tell him. He deserved to know. Haruka had kept this up long enough and she was only growing crankier as the days went by.

She couldn't do it openly. Just telling him wasn't safe; Haruka might overhear.

The Plan came to her in the middle of the night and she began it's execution the next day in the school library where she printed off a page from Haruka's website. She'd lied and said it was for an assignment about a person she admired to in order to be allowed to print in color, but the point was that she'd gotten what she needed.

At home that afternoon she dropped it and, wouldn't you know it, the accident happened right outside Light's door. By a twist of fate her clumsy step to pick it up sent the sheet under his doorway.

"Oops! There's nothing I can do about it now, I guess."

/~/~/~/~/

Light had just completed the reconstruction of his desk drawer and it would have been some time before he noticed the paper had Ryuk not pointed it out.

"Hey, Light, looks like your sister's sending you secret messages."

 _Which_ sister was what mattered, but he didn't care to let the shinigami in on his preoccupation. He was a bit perplexed by it himself, but he was expanding too much effort on weeding out the criminal element to spend much time thinking about what Haruka might be hiding. He would have a chance to interrogate the family after he'd taken care of the main problem causers. Once this information became more widely known, the fact that criminals were dying in droves, his burden would be lessened; even those who might have been inclined wouldn't dare risk it, unless there was some mental health issue and what did the world need with unpredictable people like that? If someone was willing to perform criminal acts despite the certainty of death they needed to be gotten rid of.

As he picked up the leaf of paper he immediately realized which sibling had given him the clue. It seemed Sayu had caved.

His eyes traced the page, taking on a hint of red as his interest raised; _this_ was what she'd been doing?

Sayu had provided him with a print-out of Haruka's blog.

He was on his computer and browsing her website a moment later, his ire steadily rising as he clicked through the last few days worth of photos.

 _She hadn't told him._

Ryuk cackled. "So, this was the big secret?"

 _She hadn't told him nor had he figured it out himself._

"I wonder why she didn't tell you?"

Light wasn't sure who he was more angry with. His family for agreeing to her stupid request? Haruka for behaving so childishly? Himself for failing to notice that something was off?

From her site he gleaned that she'd been in the business for about two months; he hadn't suspected a thing for most of that time. Either he had seriously misjudged her acting ability or he'd been unbelievably blind. Whatever the case he was legitimately upset about it, more so than he thought he should be, but he couldn't stop his eyes from narrowing as he crumpled the paper in his fist. He could hardly contain this feeling.

What made him furious wasn't the deception, it wasn't the secret keeping or even his inattention. No. What brought out the fury was something else.

Ryuk guffawed as Light clenched his jaw and ground his teeth. He hadn't expected this. Humans were _so_ interesting.

/~/~/~/~/

The shinigami had little knowledge of human beings and generally lacked the interest to learn more. They rarely took lives and, even when they did, put forth no effort to make an informed decision about who they killed.

As little as they knew of humanity, shinigami knew even less about themselves. Where they came from, where they might go if they died, they didn't know or care to find out. Occasionally the thought would cross a mind that, perhaps, they had once been humans who'd used a Death Note in life, but it was never spoken of.

Ryuk was unique in his curiosity regarding humankind. He thought the earth a strange place, an intriguing place.

He'd told his constant companion the whole thing was an accident, that he just happened to drop the Death Note and that Light just happened to pick it up, but he was beginning to think that might be inaccurate. Was there something else at play here?

Well, he didn't really care and certainly not enough to _say_ anything about it.

But, as he watched the teenage boy wonder struggle to contain irrational emotions over this stupid issue with his sister, he began to wonder if the Death Note might have more power than he'd thought.

As long as this stayed interesting he would do nothing to tip the kid off and it looked like something _really_ fascinating was about to happen.

/~/~/~/~/

They were calling It, Kira.

Haruka heard the name from her school friends. Whispers, just softly spoken thoughts, while they walked home. They didn't make any definitive statements, just general observations.

"People are talking about Kira online."

"Yeah, some are for him, some against."

"What do you think, Haruka?"

That was a loaded question. They were looking to her for something to latch onto, an opinion that would be safe. "People can do what they want and say what they want. There've always been consequences to actions. I'm not thinking of Kira too often, just doing what I know is right anyway. I think we all need to live lives we can be proud of. There isn't anything else we can do."

Relief washed over each face, smiles broke out, and Haruka knew that she'd pacified some of their fears. She wondered if they approved of Kira, whoever that was, and the so-called justice being served, but didn't ask. She'd spoken the truth about her own thoughts; if they had anything to add they could do it without prompting.

"Anyway," she continued. "It doesn't do any good to go on the internet and obsess over it. There are other, better ways to spend time. This is the kind of thing we leave up to fate while doing our best in our own situations."

She was rewarded with nodding heads and contented sighs.

"That's our Haruka for you, always knowing what to say!"

Home again she mentally mocked their easy acceptance of her thoughts. It was too simple to sway their opinions, they could be fooled by anyone. This was no accomplishment on her part, nothing to be proud of. Her influence was easily exerted over the weak minds of the people who called themselves her friends.

They rarely spoke of their own beliefs, always asking what she thought before making any statements. It was irritating, but Haruka was all too aware that she could be replaced. For the time being she was the one they looked up to; should someone more accessible come along they'd defect in a heartbeat.

That was the way teenage girls tended to behave. What they really wanted was to feel accepted and she could give them the attention they craved. They liked her because she seemed like one of them, easy to relate to, yet still different enough to be interesting. Nevertheless, it wasn't that she thought them worthless or that she didn't care about them, they were just so typical! It was too simple to see what they were thinking, too simple to change their minds and influence their decisions. There was no challenge in it and she ran the risk of growing bored with their company.

It was a difficult balance to maintain and she looked forward to the days when she could break out the school-girl role.

December was flowing along and with spring would come her first year post high school. She knew her family expected her to head off to college, but that didn't seem the most profitable path; it could become a distraction. She had her own plans and this modeling enterprise was a faster route to the final destination.

She would have to tell them soon.

In her room she quickly changed into her preselected outfit and took a couple shots of herself in the mirror. They were soon uploaded to the computer, brightened and color corrected.

This task was less complicated than she'd expected it to be. She'd thought the whole _blogging_ thing would be more time consuming, but she'd gotten it down to a science. A morning picture of her breakfast and bento, in the afternoon she uploaded her outfit of the day shots, and during the evening she replied to comments on the posts.

Again, it was too simple to learn the ways of those who frequented her site. The superficial things they cared about, the pictures they wanted to see, and the words they wanted to read were all easily provided.

Were all people this easy to understand?

"Hmm." Maybe not all. There was at least one person she couldn't get a clear grasp of.

Light had come home very late the evening before, with no real explanation for his absence. His evasive answers were enough for their mother and Sayu, but Haruka was still against speaking to him, so she supposed she would never know where he'd been or what he'd been doing.

His recent behavior wasn't far from the norm and she'd questioned more than once if she might be over thinking it, but every so often a look would come to his eyes that made her heart pound violently. No one else seemed to notice, but as his twin she'd always been a bit more attuned to his inner workings than the rest of their family.

Finished with her work for the moment she flicked on the small television set up beside her desk.

"We'd like to apologize for the interruption. As of now we're bringing you a live worldwide broadcast from Interpol's ICPO..."

A worldwide broadcast? From the ICPO, too. It had to be about Kira. What else warranted this kind of attention?

"L?" she murmured. "Who is 'L'?"

This man, Lind L Tailor, called out Kira. Pledged to catch him, called him evil and then...

"Dead?!" she jumped from her seat. That was impossible. Surely the culprit was about to be apprehended. This was a live broadcast! They must have seen who'd caused the heart attack. Then again, who could force a seemingly healthy person to suddenly experience heart failure?

The picture on the screen changed. There was no longer an empty seat with the Interpol backdrop, instead it was filled with the letter 'L' in some gothic-type font.

"I had to test this just in case, but I—I never thought it would actually happen. Kira, it seems you can kill people without having to be there in person. I wouldn't have believed it if I hadn't just witnessed it."

A voice distorting microphone was obviously being used. This had to be the real L, whoever he was. Lind L Tailor had been a decoy, a criminal on death row, killed by Kira on live television.

"Fool," she whispered. He'd fallen into a serious trap by confirming his existence in this way. It wasn't planned by him, it was orchestrated by an adversary, and Kira had obviously done exactly what was expected of him.

"...the truth is we are only broadcasting in the Kanto region of Japan."

As she listened to the rest of the broadcast she took in the given message. Kira was real, a murderer, and in Japan. Not only that, but the strangest part of all, he was a killer who didn't need to be in the immediate area to commit his crimes. But, he hadn't been able to kill the real L, whose name and face he didn't know.

What mattered the most, at least to her, was the knowledge that her father had to be in on it. If this was a localized broadcast then the police must have been aware and as Director Superintendent her father would be in the middle of it all.

She was sorely tempted to find her way into the files she knew were available, but resisted. There would be too much of a risk involved in that. Heaven forbid someone realize confidential data was being accessed and trace it back to her.

Besides, there was plenty of information for her to find online.

A search for Kira brought up fan websites.

"Idiots." Yet not surprising. There were also dissenters, though they weren't as vocal as the supporters. The internet provided an open forum for all kinds of nonsense, but these people were taking it to another level. Some of them almost seemed to worship Kira. "Weird."

Looking for L brought less content. She learned he was a detective, arguably the best in the world, but there was nothing more than that. No real name, no pictures. The guy was something else.

"If anyone is equipped to stand against Kira, it seems like it would be L."

However, she wondered how long it would be before policemen began dropping off the case. She assumed there had been a task force created, probably filled with the best of the best, but how many of them would remain by week's end? Who was dedicated enough to stay on _this_ case? If Kira only needed a name and a face to kill they were all at risk.

Her father wouldn't quit, she knew that, and this explained his recent late nights. He was on the Kira case, probably exclusively, and likely working under the direction of L. His safety wasn't guaranteed and she resolved to keep track of any odd feelings she might have as the days wore on.

That was something she seriously considered telling Light, but she was still bitter about his lack of involvement in her life.

"If anything happens I'll tell him."

It was a strange ability, one she would have never asked for, but it had proven useful once; a life saved and a friendship lost. Maybe that was the cost? She didn't blame her, Ogawa, Kumiko, for the way she'd reacted. Who could believe it unless they'd experienced it themselves?

She shook her head. She hated to think of it and who could say if it was even something she could do anymore? It had been years since anything like that happened; perhaps she'd lost the curse.

Light was the only one in the family who knew of it. He'd witnessed more than one episode and his initial skepticism had quelled with the death of a mutual friend. He hadn't known how to comfort her, except to say that she'd tired to prevent the tragedy.

"If it's fate, there's nothing you can do to stop it," he'd said as he tried to wipe away her tears.

But, if it _was_ fate, why had she been given the knowledge of such a horror in advance? Why make her witness it firsthand?

She still blamed herself for those deaths, but overall tried not to dwell on the misfortune. In self-defense she kept herself from growing too emotionally invested in her friends, she thought that might have an influence over the things she saw, and if she didn't care too much she would have no strong subconscious desires to protect them.

She'd asked herself multiple times if that was selfish and always found herself answering with a 'maybe', but she supposed it was a natural reaction and refused to feel badly for it. Someday she might change her mind, be glad for the ability, but that day was not today.

In the meantime she had other things to be doing.

Her blog was growing steadily and she wondered if she might have Kira to thank for that. Despite what they said online, she knew that most people were still feeling nervous about what was happening. It was a frightening idea that someone, somewhere, could kill whoever he wanted just by knowing who they were. Suppose he decided to go after petty criminals as well? Plenty of people had done stupid things in the past, would they also be targeted?

With that fear in mind they were looking for things to bring them happiness. Latching onto unnecessary, unimportant things was what people did in trying situations. Why else would a person, when faced with a serious problem, talk instead of the inconsequential? Why would a student who needed to take an important test spend their time with internet games instead of studying?

Simple. They didn't want to face the reality and chose an escape route instead. By ignoring the issue they hoped to delay it, maybe make it disappear altogether. Never mind that it didn't work; if someone wanted a temporary reprieve from their everyday lives they would find one. Once upon a time people had turned to books for diversion, but today the internet was used to fill a void many felt in their hearts.

What did her breakfast matter to anyone else? It didn't really and under normal circumstances she knew she wouldn't have seen this kind of growth, but right now a lot of people were looking for that escape. They were living through her.

When she posted a photo of herself in a dressy outfit they wondered if she had a date, imagined themselves in the same situation rather than their own life. The escapism mentality was a powerful thing and Kira was making it the preferred route for so many that they were finding and using her to help themselves pretend that life was fine.

She would never condone Kira or what he was doing, but that didn't mean she couldn't profit from the fallout.

Humans were _so_ predictable.

 **Death Note Facts**

No one knows where the first Death Note came from, not even the Shinigami king.


	3. Dealings

_**A/N: Thanks for reading thus far; I hope you've enjoyed it and continue to stick with the story!**_

 _Chapter 3_

 _Dealings_

A picture or two and then...

"Do you honestly have to do that, Haruka?"

"Mom, it's what the people want. Who am I to deny them?"

"I just find it odd. Pictures of your food? Why?"

She shrugged. "I can't really say, but they like this. It would be stupid to ignore the amount of attention these posts get. I know it seems strange, but people enjoy seeing into the lives of others."

Sachiko had given her eldest daughter free reign over her own breakfast and lunch. She was growing more elaborate with the meals she created, waking early to utilize the kitchen and take her photos before leaving for school. Haruka hadn't ever shown an interest in cooking before, but it was a necessary life skill so Sachiko allowed it.

"You've seen magazine interviews, they ask about this kind of thing. People like to know what 'celebrities' eat. I'm not saying I'm on that level, but it's the same principle."

"I suppose." Yes, that was true. Even Sayu was interested in that kind of thing; just the other day she'd seen a picture of that singer with a certain drink before requesting one for herself. She could remember having the same sort of feelings when she was younger, wanting to emulate a person she looked up to. "When you explain it that way it makes more sense, but I still wonder about the maturity of those who take it so seriously."

Haruka laughed. "Me too, but if they're my fans I need to be grateful to them."

She adjourned to her bedroom to clean up the photos and post them. While there she changed into her school uniform, got her bag, and then returned downstairs to consume the food she'd made.

Her mother watched as she ate, something she'd taken to putting more effort into as of late. Haruka guessed she was concerned about the possibility of meal skipping, but she had no reason to do that. She wasn't preoccupied with her weight; as long as she had balanced meals and kept up her usual routine there was no cause for concern.

"Okay, well, I'm done so I'll head out."

"Do you really need to leave so early these days?"

"It gives me time to study before most people get into the classroom. Here I'm tempted to check the blog or do other things, but at school I have nothing else to do." That and she didn't want to meet with Light.

"Have a safe trip."

Out the gate and onto the road. The streets were quiet, few were up and about yet. Adults were on their way to work already, but she didn't meet with any other students. Most of them would wait until the last possible moment before leaving the warmth of their homes.

"Another day." Another typical, boring day. At least she had plans after school to go to a shoot. That made life slightly more interesting and she actually found herself looking forward to the work. To be honest she hadn't thought she would find enjoyment in this job, but it was more absorbing than she'd thought it would be.

It was fun, being the center of attention. All eyes on her, people asking if she wanted anything, giving her compliments and making promises to help her gain notoriety. Things were progressing well and it would soon be time to take the next step:

Making modeling her career.

She'd thought long and hard about this choice, wondered if it was the right direction to move in, and had finally come to the decision that it was the best course of action for her to take. She wanted to be influential and this door was already open.

Her parents would be against it. She knew it wasn't what they envisioned for her. They expected her to use this experience on an application, to watch her go off to college, likely with her brother, and succeed on some other track. She could think of only one way to guarantee their support.

"Tch." She didn't want to tell him, but if Light was on her side Sachiko and Soichiro would have a hard time arguing against the both of them. They knew Light was brilliant and his influence would be invaluable. If he was to reason on her behalf she could be assured that her parents would agree to her wishes in the end.

There was still time, but not much of it. The biggest mistake she could make would be putting off the inevitable. Even so, the thought of telling Light about her endeavors after all this time was enough to make her nauseous.

She entered the school building, changed shoes at her locker, ascended the staircase, and traversed the halls to her classroom. As she'd expected there were few people in the building and no one from her class had arrived yet. Soon a couple of people would be there to set up the room, but she decided to take that matter into her own hands.

This generosity would not go unnoticed by her classmates. They would be grateful to her and tell their friends of her kindness. Perhaps this would be something they remembered and passed on to others, either through actions or words.

With a sigh she sat at her desk. Maybe she and Kira weren't so different with what they hoped to achieve, but their methods differed widely. To her the ends didn't justify the means and if she couldn't do this the right way she wouldn't do it at all.

It was wrong to kill people on your own like Kira was, even if they were criminals with a violent past. The justice system was in place for a reason. Accidents happened, mistakes could be made. Who could say if Kira had killed someone who'd been wrongly accused? Sometimes circumstantial evidence was used when it shouldn't be and backroom deals weren't unheard of; there were people imprisoned who'd done nothing wrong.

Kira was childish. Naive even. How could he take police reports at face value? With the rate of death she thought it unlikely he was taking the time to look into all the evidence used to convict his targets and if he wasn't doing that then he was being lax. Making assumptions was wrong and lazy.

L said Kira was evil. Though the words had come out of the mouth of Lind L Tailor she felt certain they'd been written ahead of time by the real L. He'd probably set up the entire display.

"He might be right about that trait." Kira was a murderer, regardless of who he killed or how much he thought they deserved it. Death row existed to finish people who'd committed heinous crimes; though it often moved too slowly for her tastes that wasn't for her to decide.

Based on his demonstrated personality she thought Kira must be around her age, but the real question was how he'd gotten his power.

She believed in the existence of extrasensory perception, thought she might have a bit of ESP herself, so maybe it was something similar? But, why start to use it now of all times? Why not long ago and with more discretion?

There were too many unknowns here. It was a waste of time to think about this; she had no way of finding the truth. Unless she could somehow convince her father to let her in on the case she'd never know more than the general public, but he wasn't likely to allow that. Light had a much greater chance of becoming involved than she. He'd helped the police with smaller cases before, but who knew if he'd tell her anything with the way things were between them.

For more than one reason she had to make up with Light.

/~/~/~/~/

As expected she was praised for her _hard work_. She didn't have the brains of her brother or the determination to make up for what lacked with studying, so this was her way of leaving a lasting impression on her teachers and classmates. She did well enough on school assignments, but with her grades, though she ranked within the top ten percent, she was never going to get to number one. She used to dream of being one and two with Light, but those fantasies had faded long ago. They didn't have the same set of abilities and she'd accepted that fact.

Instead she concentrated her efforts on endearing herself through perceived altruism. So far it had worked like a charm.

"I can't believe how fast the end is coming!"

"I know, soon we'll be out of high school."

Her friends were gathered around her desk; the lunch hour had arrived and they'd planned to eat together. It was a surprise when Light appeared in the doorway asking for her.

"Haruka-chan, your brother is here to get you!"

She'd twitched in her seat and looked to him with wide eyes. Why in the world was he–

"Sayu," she muttered darkly as she stood, pushing away from her desk. "Sorry," she turned to her friends. "It looks like Light wants to have lunch with me."

They gave her assurances that they understood, raved about the way the two looked together. Haruka was used to those kinds of compliments. Most of the girls in school had a thing for Light and she'd been subjected to their delusions about his character more than once. She knew it wasn't really their fault, they didn't know him like she did, but it could be bothersome listening to them extol his many imagined virtues.

Like how good of a kisser he must be.

She gagged at the thought. Why in the world would they ask her about that? How would she know? She could swear a few of them were half convinced that something must have happened between the siblings at one time or another; they were looking for drama and scandal where it didn't exist.

She shot rumors like those down with the intensity of a thousand dying suns. Unfortunately things like that, no matter how untrue they were, would crop up whether she said anything or not. Meanwhile Light alternately thought it hilarious or didn't care at all.

She was on her own on that front.

Haruka followed her brother to the cafeteria, in silence, where they occupied one of the smaller two seated table by the windows.

He definitely knew. She could see it in the way he sat, leaning toward her, putting himself just a bit too close for comfort.

"So," he began. "You got a job, right?"

He wanted her to spill it on her own, though he was already aware. Well, he was going to be disappointed.

"Yeah. I did. What of it?"

His eyes narrowed slightly, a hint of a frown pulling at his lips.

"Haruka, why didn't you tell me?"

She exhaled. "Why should I have? You figured it out eventually, though I imagine it was more because Sayu finally lost the battle wills and told you, rather than you solving the mystery yourself."

He didn't acknowledge her charge. "You should have told me. It was immature to keep a secret like that."

"I've always been the infantile one, haven't I? This is right in line with my character. You shouldn't be surprised."

"Surprised? No, I'm not exactly. Maybe at how long Sayu held out, but not so much your behavior." He opened his bento, motioned for her to do the same. "But I still want to know _why_."

She eyed him; the real reason was slightly embarrassing, but he would know if she lied and that would be worse.

"Fine. I'll tell you the truth, but if you laugh I'll never you another thing about me as long as I live. Even if you die first I won't visit your grave to let you know how my life has been." He didn't say anything, but she thought he seemed mildly amused. That wasn't an exaggeration though, she meant every word. "I– I was jealous."

His expression became void of emotion.

"Don't take that the wrong way, okay? It was just because you spend so much time studying and when you aren't doing that, all holed up in your room, you're with your own friends. I realize that's totally normal, but since the summer you haven't even... I mean, you don't ask me anything anymore. So, when something big happened I kept it to myself. I meant to tell you and Sayu at the same time, but there was never an opportunity for that, so I told her at dinner one night when you ate upstairs and that was when I made them promise not to tell. If you weren't interested then why should I have to go after you?" She crossed her arms over her chest and turned away, nose in the air.

And then, suddenly, his face was right in front of hers. He'd moved his chair and his arm came to rest around her shoulders. He looked her in the eye and asked, with a certain amount of disbelief, "You were jealous?"

Haruka seriously considered slapping him or at least getting up and leaving. That was what he got out of everything she'd said? She settled for turning away entirely, shrugging off his arm as she did. She brought one leg up to rest across the other and bounced her foot in agitation.

"No, that isn't what I just said, _Onii-chan_ ," sarcasm was her tone of choice.

"I'm sorry, it just doesn't seem like you to keep that to yourself. If you wanted to spend more time together, why didn't you do it?"

She knew what he meant. He was asking why she hadn't barged into his room and demanded an explanation. Coerced him into taking her out or something, but the fact was that they were older and behaving that way would only give fuel to those stupid rumormongers.

She did _not_ feel that way about her brother, not even close, but at one time she had definitely been the clingy little sister. Light was so smart, dammit! He was too perfect! How could she not have wanted him to look at her? That was normal enough, many girls went through that kind of stage with their fathers or brothers, convinced they would marry that important person someday, and as they had for others those feelings washed-out into something duller as she grew older, but she still wanted his attention and when he suddenly withdrew it she was left to flounder.

"Because I understood why you were doing it. You had to study, still have to, and you couldn't spend all your time outside of that with your 'effing sister! That's just creepy and," she dropped her voice, "in case you forgot, people like to talk about things even if they aren't true."

It took him a moment to catch her meaning, but when he did he laughed. "Oh, you mean–"

"Shut up!" she hissed, flipping around to stand over him and cover his mouth with both hands. Of course that drew a few looks and in hindsight she realized this action might bring exactly what she was trying to avoid, but it was too late to change it now. She released a small cough into her fist and sat once more, trying to look nonchalant as she smoothed her skirt and crossed her ankles. "Anyway, that's why. Happy? I told you everything so... So there! That's it." She hated how awkward he was making her feel. It wasn't fair.

She was unaware of how Light felt about it all. This had gone far better than he'd expected it to. Haruka had been _jealous_. He felt he should have realized it, but she was right about the studying and now he had other things to do on top of that. He couldn't pin all the blame on her. It was also a testament to how important appearances were to his sister and he'd already been aware of that issue.

"I'm sorry," he said finally, watching as she chewed on her lip. "I should have known how you would take it, but _you_ should have known how _I_ would act about it. Even if I had thought of it, and I didn't, things probably would have turned out the same way." He sat back in his chair. "You're so pushy. I didn't realize anything was wrong because you didn't bring it up." He hummed in thought. "Maybe you're more mature than I thought, if you can curb those kinds of impulses."

"Making fun of me." He was right though. More than once she'd wanted to knock his door down and drag him out of the house.

He smirked. "I'll have to take you on a _date_ to make up for this, right?"

"What?" she spluttered. "No. No way. I don't want to." It didn't sound convincing, even to her.

"Not now," he reached for her chopsticks. "I don't have time between cram school and studying. Soon though. Once exams are finished. We won't have much time after that with school starting up again."

She pinched her lips shut, glared at him when he tried to _feed_ her. Who did he think he was? Besides that, if she opened her mouth she might say something she'd regret. She wasn't ready to tell him about her plans; they'd just started getting along again. He would be mad about it before he accepted it.

Then again the look that came to his face suggested that he'd already realized she was holding something back. Damn him.

"Tell me."

"Don't want to."

"Too bad."

She tried to stare him down, but as always that was a contest he won. "Alright, but, if you're going to get mad, just– Just hold it in until later." He was growing apprehensive, she could see him becoming still. "The truth is, I don't want to go to college."

"...What?" Flat. He _was_ angry.

"I'm guessing you know about my work, that I'm into modeling, and I want to stay on this track. I like it. I've never been great with studying, I don't enjoy it like you do. Grades were never so important to me and I haven't ever known what I wanted to do. I considered politics, maybe journalism, but that doesn't feel right. It's too boring." She shifted in her seat, tried to look as helpless as possible as she clasped her hands together under her chin and looked up at him from beneath her lashes. "Please understand! You know I'm not cut out for more schooling. It would be a waste of time and money. Why should I try to pursue the wrong path when a door has already been opened in front of me? I'm doing well _now_ and I can keep it up." She reached for his sleeve, held it tightly and was relieved when he didn't try to pull away. "So, help me tell our parents. They won't listen to just me."

He sat in silence for several minutes and she held onto him the entire time, wondering what he was thinking. He was too good at keeping a poker face, something else she wished she could master but likely never would.

Eventually he removed her hand from his arm and took up the chopsticks again. This time she didn't refuse the offer, hoping against hope that he would accept her plea and unwilling to do anything that might upset him before he'd made up his mind.

"If I agree to do this," he began as she chewed, "You have to make some concessions too."

She nodded eagerly, nearly choked when she tried to speak too soon. "Sure, sure. Whatever you want!"

Light handed her his soda as her eyes watered, shook his head at her easily given promises. She probably thought she was manipulating him and he hated to admit that she sort of was; he would turn that around on her, but if Haruka had one real talent it was _definitely_ manipulation. She would resent the term, insist she was good at persuasion, but batting eyelashes was hardly being persuasive. "You have to make me lunch everyday until I say otherwise."

"Fine."

"And we're eating together from now on."

"Great. Good plan."

Her earnest stare was wearing him down. A brief idea, hardly more than half a thought, passed through his mind.

He considered finding out who the top people were in her agency and killing them.

Because she was watching him so closely Haruka saw the flash of red in her brother's eyes. It was there for hardly a moment, but it did catch her attention. Had it been a trick of the light?

"Also, you need to _tell me_ about what you're doing. I'm not sitting around in the dark anymore and I don't want to have to go after Sayu for secondhand information."

"Understandable. But seriously, will you or won't you?"

He sighed, ran a hand through his hair and leaned his head back. He didn't want to. He didn't want her doing this, he didn't like it. But, how could he tell her no? What reason could he give? Not a rational one.

"I guess."

He was unprepared for her holler of success and they _both_ ended up on the floor when she launched from her seat to hug him, but it was nice to be back in her good graces, even if he had the growing desire to end her career before it started.

/~/~/~/~/

Haruka didn't walk home with him; she had a photo shoot.

He clenched his fists in frustration.

"Hey, Light, what's got you so upset? She's just working."

He didn't want to answer Ryuk, but the shinigami was persistent.

"You keep acting this way and people will get the wrong idea."

"Who cares?" he fought to keep his voice low, calm. "As God of the new world I'd think I'm entitled to do whatever I like, especially after everything I'm doing to make the world a better place."

Ryuk eyed the teen with interest. This was getting better and better.

"You don't mean you'd actually be with your sister, do you? Not that I care, but that does sound interesting." He laughed loudly. "You know what? Do it."

Light shook his head. "You're only in it for a good time," he observed. "That would be harder to pull off than everything else combined."

"Sure it would. But, you like challenges don't you?"

He couldn't argue against that point.

Nothing worth having was easy to get.

/~/~/~/~/

"Haruka-chan, would you like a ride?"

She turned, looked a young man named Tanaka, Aoi in the eye, and answered with a smile. "If you really wouldn't mind."

"Not at all!"

She pretended not to notice the flush that came over his face.

She'd met Tanaka a few times; he was a freelancer, took lighting jobs as they presented themselves and he'd been on more than one shoot with her. He had a full-time desk job, but he'd told her he was hoping to break away from the corporate world.

He held the passenger side door open for her.

She didn't hate the man, but he liked her more than she liked him. She thought it a bit sad, but didn't feel wrong about accepting this offer. It was better than taking the bus.

"So," she struck up conversation. It would be torturous to sit in silence. "How'd you get into lighting for photo shoots?"

"While I was in college I worked part time with a professional photographer. She had a studio, took family portraits and things like that. At the time I didn't think I could turn it into a stable job. That was a mistake on my part," he laughed. "For now I'm stuck at a desk like everyone else."

"Hmm, but at least you're getting back into work you like."

"Yeah, it's been hard, but I enjoy this."

She nodded. "That's good, oh turn left at the next intersection."

"Right."

They snorted at the play on words. The ice was officially broken.

"Haruka-chan, how'd you get your start in this business?"

"Me? Well, it was an accident. I never thought about people being recruited in real life, but I guess it happens. I had to ask my parents though, that was the hardest part."

"They were against it?"

"Not exactly. It's just that my dad is the director superintendent of police so–"

"Really?!" he exclaimed. "No kidding?"

Slightly nervous; she thought that the appropriate reaction. She'd be more worried if it didn't make him anxious. "Yes, so he's really careful. He insisted on doing background checks on everyone. He even came, with his lawyer, when I signed the contract. I think he scared the head of the agency, but I guess it works in my favor. No one will try to screw me over."

Tanaka blinked in surprise. He'd never heard the girl use that type of phrase and found her more attractive for it. Truthfully he thought her beautiful, but she seemed almost too perfect. "I didn't think you spoke that way."

"Oops," she put a hand to her mouth and smiled sheepishly. "Sorry. I don't usually, but actually I sometimes need to put a lot of effort into editing what I say before I say it."

By the time he was opening the car door for her at the Yagami home Tanaka was enamored.

She waved as he drove away, felt a little guilty for _maybe_ leading him on, but allowed the feeling to pass. She hadn't done anything overtly flirty; she'd been no more than friendly. Still, it would be better to be careful about things like that. The last thing she needed was a trial of broken hearts and gossip to go along with them. There were sayings about spurned women, but men could be just as bad.

She entered the house without fanfare. There was no one at the entrance to greet her, but she guessed that her siblings would be upstairs and their mother was probably getting dinner on the table.

To the second floor she went, and into her room, to change before supper.

She was just buttoning up a new top when the doorbell rang.

"Dad?" He was home earlier than usual; had there been a break in the case? She doubted he'd discuss it, but there had to be a reason for his early return. Any progress was better than no progress.

Before leaving the bedroom she took stock of herself in the full length mirror that hung on the back of her door.

A navy blue blouse with white polka dots and black skinny jeans. She'd pulled her hair up, into a pony tail that would likely end in frustration when she had to cut out the band.

"Eh." It was alright, but there was no reason to get all dressed up for dinner at home so she stopped short of accessorizing. "I'll use this for tomorrow's upload."

Light was at the bottom of the stairs when she started to descend, greeting their father.

"Hey, glad you could join us for dinner. You hungry, Dad?"

"Yeah, it's been a long day."

"Dad! You're back early."

"Ah, Haruka. Yes, for once." He excused himself to freshen up before the meal was served, leaving the twins alone with a look that appealed for peace as he moved up the staircase.

He said he'd had a long day. What did that mean? He seemed weary, but that wasn't surprising.

She looked to Light, he too remained on the stairs, and thought back to that afternoon. Had she really seen red in his eyes? He didn't seem any different than usual now, and yet _s_ _omething_. Something was off.

He turned to her, gave her the once over and a serious case of the shivers. "You look nice."

"Um, thanks." Strange. Really strange.

A raised eyebrow. "Are you planning on coming down the stairs or...?"

She jumped, "Oh right!", and lost her balance.

Light, standing at the base of the stairway, was directly in her path and the two tumbled into the wall as he broke her fall.

"Sorry!" she exclaimed once she caught her breath. "Sorry, are you okay?"

His back was to the wall and, while they were both on the floor, Haruka found herself trapped. His legs were bent upward and when she made to stand he caught her wrist saying, "Hold on. Are you hurt?"

She tried to shake her head, opened her mouth to tell him "No", but the words died on her lips as his hands came to her face. He turned her head one way, then the other, and pushed her chin up.

To anyone watching it would have seemed that he was just checking for bumps or bruises, but it felt different to her, wrong somehow.

Before she could get too worked up about it their father appeared at the top of the stairs. "What happened?" he asked.

Light smiled at the older man, his sister could see that it was contrived, as he provided an answer. "Haruka lost her balance. Don't worry," his eyes came back to hers. "I caught her."

There was that red flash again. This time she was sure it wasn't an illusion of refracting light; did that mean it had been real before too? What did it signify?

"Well try to be more careful Haruka or you'll end up taking both yourself _and_ your brother out of commission." Soichiro shook his head and turned away. It seemed that some things never changed. At least they appeared to be on better terms; that was one less thing to worry about and he had enough on his plate as it was.

As their father disappeared once more Haruka put a hastily concocted plan into action. Surely, everything was fine. This didn't mean anything. "Light, you– hit your head, right?" She tried not to sound nervous, told herself her fear was irrational, and shifted to sit on her knees. "Here, let me look."

Nothing was wrong. Nothing was wrong. Nothing was wrong.

He leaned forward, put his forehead on her shoulder and with shaking hands she gently pushed her fingers into his hair, carefully checking for an injury.

Everything is fine, she thought. He's just concerned and–

But then his arms were around her and he was holding her _way too close_. He'd turned his head, she could feel his lips on her neck, and she wanted to convince herself that it had been an accident because he was pulling away already.

She had to be wrong, wanted to be wrong, but his eyes said otherwise.

What was the expression? Eyes were the windows to the soul. But, with a crimson color that wasn't his own, she had to wonder if this person had a soul at all.

/~/~/~/~/

They sat side by side as they always did when everyone had dinner together, a rarity as late. Sayu was beside their mother, seated across from Haruka, while their father was positioned at the head of the table and he took the task of striking up conversation.

"So, Light, tell me, how are your studies going?"

"Hm? Everything's okay I guess."

Sayu was quick to contradict the humble answer. "Whatever! He's at the top of his class! My big brother's a genius."

"That's my son! We're all proud of you, Light." No one could mistake the pride in their mother's voice.

Light redirected the flow of speech. "Is everything okay, Dad? You look tired."

"Yeah. I'm not able to say too much about it, but this case I'm working on now is really tough."

"My big sister is pretty cool too, though," Sayu commented, looking to Haruka with shinning eyes. "Even if she is just as bad at math as I am."

"Haha," she muttered in response. "At least I _try_ to do my work."

"You know if you need help you can ask me."

So he said, but was that really her brother? That soulless _thing_ at the bottom of the stairs– She couldn't accept it.

"No thanks. I can do it myself."

"Don't be petulant, Haruka," their father warned. "If you need help it's better to ask for it."

"Or accept it when it's offered," Sachiko added.

"If I needed his help I _would_ ask for it and, actually, I did ask for help with something," she kicked him under the table, "earlier today." It was better to pretend that she hadn't noticed anything out of the ordinary, especially in front of the family.

"Oh?" Their mother was interested in this. "Are you two on speaking terms again?"

"Tch."

"Yeah, Mom. I figured out what was going on."

Sayu glanced away and hummed a quiet tune.

"Well, it's about time, isn't it? At the rate you were going I was afraid you'd be upset beyond the start of college." A relieved smile came to her face.

"Funny you should mention that because _that_ was what I was asking him for help about," Haruka's hands clenched together in her lap. She looked at the table. "Because, you know, school and I– kind of..." How was she supposed to explain this?

Any design she might have had fled her mind when Light put a hand over hers, his thumb caressing her skin as he pushed her hands apart. She stiffened.

"Haruka doesn't want to continue her schooling."

The gasps of shock were audible.

"She what?!"

"Haruka!"

"When did you decide that!?"

She shot a glare at Light. "Way to be tactful," she hissed as she dug her nails into his flesh. "Baka, Onii-chan."

He jerked his hand away and she noted, with some satisfaction, that there were indeed marks left behind.

"She told me this afternoon," he explained. "I was against it at first, but after thinking about it I understand what she means. She wasn't ever as good with school work as I am and she does have a career path already."

Their parents remained skeptical, but Sayu was prepared to join in as an advocate.

"I thought you might do something like this," she said. "Light's right, you're not so great with school and–"

"Better than you!" Haruka interrupted, indignant.

"–and you're already doing really well with modeling. What if this is like, your destiny? Maybe you're _supposed_ to be a star!" Her smiled widened as a new idea occurred to her. "Maybe you're supposed become an idol, meet Hideki-kun and introduce him to _me_ and–,"

"That's enough, Sayu," their mother interrupted before turning to her husband. "Soichiro..."

His silence was enough of an answer, but Haruka had been prepared for this. Desperate times called for desperate measures and she was serious about this decision. Schooling wasn't for her, but if they couldn't accept that she'd come up with a contingency plan.

"It's fine if you can't give your blessing, Dad. I understand, but then I have to ask you to understand too when I say that if you really _can't_ accept this I'll be moving out," she ignored the looks of surprise. "Either on our birthday or once school is over. It would be easier once high school is done, but I'll be 18 at the end of February so–,"

Light's hand came down on her shoulder like a vice.

She had a very short space of time to come to a conclusion about what he was doing. It did no good to deny what she'd seen, or _hadn't_ seen, in his eyes earlier or what she'd felt in response. She'd had the horrible, wild thought that he might be Kira, but could not reconcile the image of an emotionally immature mass murderer with that of her brother. Clearly something else was involved, but how could she find out what was really happening?

The only way to win at this game was to play as well. If she wanted to gain anything she'd have to join in. Could she handle that? Perhaps that wasn't the right question to ask. Could she handle _not_ taking part? She got the feeling there was more at stake than she could even hope to imagine.

She might lose if she played, but she would _definitely_ lose if she didn't.

Her heart and mind came to agreement; this had to be done.

"I think I should leave you all to talk this over, but maybe Light should come with me for a minute. He didn't know about this either and I should explain it to him."

His grip loosened as she spoke and released entirely when she stood from the table. The two left the dinning area to no protest.

Sayu watched them leave and briefly considered following, but the hand her mother placed on her knee, and a slight shake of her head, dissuaded the girl. It seemed her older siblings would need a private moment and, as she looked to her father, she thought it best she not abandon the table.

/~/~/~/~/

His hand came to rest on the small of her back the moment the door closed behind them. It wasn't easy to suppress the shudder of disgust that threatened to overtake her, but this was to be expected. Whatever being had control of her brother's body needed to believe that she was a willing participant.

She shook her head at the direction of her thoughts; she was actually hoping that Light was indwelt with some kind spirit. If that was the case she could at least put the blame on someone else, but if it turned out that this really was him then she would have to seriously consider the possibility of ending his life, either by her own hands or those of the justice system.

Part of her hoped, perhaps foolishly, that it was just the bump to his head taking effect.

"Haruka, what are you thinking?" He was visibly upset. She'd expected him to be unhappy with the way she sprung the news, but he seemed to be taking it personally.

"I'm thinking..." Was this too much? Would he be suspicious of her motives? "...that we should talk upstairs. Alone. In your room."

She tried not to cringe as she took his hand and led him down the hall and up the stairs. He didn't resist and she saw that as a good sign, though also a little concerning. She wasn't the best actress and thought he should have seen through her awkward phrasing.

In his bedroom she encountered another uncomfortable choice: Did she sit at his desk or on his bed?

Sitting at the desk wouldn't be too strange, but it could be interpreted as a sign of discomfort. The problem was that sitting on the bed could be a sign that she was _too_ comfortable.

Which was worse in the big scheme of things, with all her concerns considered?

She said nothing when she heard the lock click and took her seat on the edge of his bed.

"I'm sorry," she began. "I didn't mean to lay it all out that way, but you're to blame too! I didn't know you were going to bring it up so soon."

He remained standing.

"I was going to tell you about that part, but I hadn't really planned it all yet so I didn't want to say anything until I was sure." This much was true. She had intended to explain this to Light before speaking to their parents about her plans for the future.

Finally he spoke. "You do realize that _you_ were the one who started talking about school, right?"

"Huh? Nope, sorry. I don't recall that. You're misremembering." Even though he wasn't. She'd gotten flustered when their mother brought up college plans.

"Of course you don't," he sat beside her. "Because Haruka never does anything wrong and she's always right." It sounded like the typical jest, but she thought otherwise as his arm draped across her shoulders and he pulled her into his side.

Again, she struggled to contain a quiver of fear and tried to remember why she'd made this situation possible in the first place. She had to play the game with him, find out how far he was willing to go and try to beat him, whatever that entailed.

She calmed her pounding heart with those thoughts. This wasn't about her, this was about Light and figuring out what he was doing. This was about the ruby red color his eyes had taken on, so bright that she could see it in the darkness, and pulling him back from the edge of an abyss. Something had taken hold of him, but she was the only one who saw it and the only one who could do anything about it.

Light was holding her fully now, both arms wrapped around her body; this affection, disturbing as it was, served to spur Haruka into action. If this soulless monster wanted to be close to her then dammit she could get close to it for the sake of her family.

With that in mind she pushed revulsion far into the recesses of her psyche and shifted into his lap.

Her concerns that he would find it unusual were stayed when he chuckled.

"My imōto still likes to be close to her brother?"

"Shut up," she muttered. "This is embarrassing."

"Why?"

For more than one reason, but she needed fool him so, "Just because!" Keep it simple, she told herself. Getting too elaborate would tip him off.

"You don't need to be embarrassed, I'd like to be closer to you too. We drifted apart for a while," he pulled her hairband out, "but I want us to be intimate again."

How could he say that in such a, such a _dirty_ way? Exactly when had they ever been 'intimate'? This was getting fouler by the second.

She gripped the front of his shirt with one hand and leaned her head against his chest, tilting to look up at him. His eyes were blood-red. "How so?"

Rather than answer he slid his hand down her back and around to grip her hip.

"Light...?" She could muster no more than a whisper.

"Don't be nervous. Don't you know that I love you more than anyone else ever will? More than anyone else ever can?"

She was unable to hide the fright quickly enough; his eye flickered, for a moment he looked immeasurably angry, but it was gone even more rapidly than it appeared and he was saying, "I'm sorry. I confused you, didn't I? Made you upset."

"Not– not exactly."

His lips quirked and she watched with trepidation as his gaze wandered over her face. "Let me explain it to you, so you can understand." His hand was on her cheek, stroking, his nose bumped against hers and his mouth descended, molding with that of his sister for the briefest of moments.

A hunger awoke, one he had never known before, and he touched her lips to his again. And then again. And again, and again, and again and he felt as if he would never get enough of her taste so he pulled her closer, holding her body to his as they fell backward onto the bed.

He heard her squeak, felt her struggle, but if she was wholly against this she would have put up more of a fight. Haruka was not one to go down without a battle and he suspected that her upset had more to do with surprise than anything else.

After all, though she couldn't possibly be fully aware, she had to realize that he had changed. He was different, powerful. He held life and death in his hands. He would be God of a new world and she had always been His. Even her previous distress had been driven by her desire for His attention. She wanted this, even if her sense of decency made it hard for her to accept.

It would be difficult to say whether or not Haruka would have been gratified by Light's thoughts, to the extent that he remained unaware of her true purpose, because even if she had known what he was thinking she could hardly make sense of her own mind at the moment.

Repulsed. She was absolutely repulsed by this turn of events, or at least her brain and heart were. To her disgust her body was behaving in an opposing manner. She _knew_ this was her brother beneath her, that Light had kissed her, was still kissing her, and running his hands up and down her back under her blouse, but that didn't seem to matter to the butterflies in her stomach.

If there was one thing she didn't want to do it was consent to this liaison by pretending to go along with his affection, but was it really a lie if her body actually _wanted_ to reciprocate?

And the winner of my first kiss is: Light, she thought grimly.

Of all the things she'd thought he might do _this_ had been far down on the list of expectations, but it was too late to back out and if she didn't participate he would recognize her falsehoods. So, using all the acting ability she had, Haruka pulled away and sat up on top of him only to encounter a new mental block.

How was she supposed to act? Shy or alluring, which was more appropriate and how could she figure that out in the next two seconds?

"Um..." Shy it was; though it would appear out of character under normal circumstances she hoped he would forgive this lapse and chalk it up to nerves. "O–onii-chan," her face was on fire as her voice wavered. She thought it absurd, told herself she had nothing to be ashamed of. She wasn't the instigator here. Even so, it was hard to take it in. He'd _really_ pulled her onto his bed and kissed her senseless hadn't he? This wasn't just a realistic nightmare. She shook herself and tried to reclaim her prior determination. "Light."

He pushed up onto his elbows and raised an eyebrow. "Yes?"

She could detect the faintest hint of impatience in his voice. "I," she reached forward to lock her arms around his neck and tugged to the side. He followed easily and hovered above as she spoke. "I want to be on the bottom."

She wanted to die as his eyes shifted from red to black.

The smile that came to his face was savage.

 **Death Note Facts**

 _ **All actions of a human Death Note user are voluntary, but the Note holds a significant power**_ _ **generally unknown to both Shinigami and human users:**_ _ **The Note will**_ _ **greatly**_ _ **influence**_ _ **human**_ _ **decisions.**_


	4. Pursuit

_**A/N: The Light+Haruka relationship explained in musical form: Ideekay by Ephixa (find it on YouTube, Monstercat 007- Solace).**_

 _Chapter 4_

 _Pursuit_

She felt like he was trying to swallow her whole. His mouth on hers with long, deep kisses, his weight nearly crushing her, but it seemed like no matter what she allowed it wasn't enough.

When she let him push her head to the side and attack her neck, when she let him pull her hair until she hissed at the sensation, when she let her own mind go in strategic retreat as his hand moved over her chest and palmed her breast...

They were being followed.

Light hadn't told her this, she'd noticed it herself. She thought it likely L had all the members of the police being tailed as well as immediate family members. It made sense, but it was a declaration of mistrust that would be heard when the truth came out. The officers wouldn't be happy once they learned of what had happened, some might even bow out of the investigation.

She was walking today. She'd done an outdoor shoot not far from home and had waved away the offers of a ride from the woman she'd worked with, Amane, Misa, assuring her that she would be fine on her own.

"Okay! Misa was glad to work with you, Haruka-chan, and hopes to see you again soon!"

Well, maybe calling her a 'woman' was a bit much. She seemed much more like a bubbly teenager than an adult despite the fact that she was almost two years Haruka's senior. Then again, appearances could be deceiving. Who knew what might lie beneath the facade of an excitable model?

She wondered if Amane could be hiding something as crazy as _she_ was, but decided against it. Her life was on another level altogether. At the moment she was tempted to go elsewhere, but her family would worry if she didn't return and that might raise suspicion.

Haruka thought it an incredible, and strange, twist of fate that no one had noticed anything odd about her. Their father could be excused, he was rarely home at all, but neither her mother nor Sayu had a clue what was going on with the other children in the household.

"Light," there he was, leaning against the lamppost. "Hey, did you come to meet me?"

He nodded, glanced over her shoulder, but made no comment.

She knew he was aware of the stalkers, but he hadn't said anything about it and she kept her knowledge to herself. She was unsure if he thought she was conscious of their follower, but it didn't really matter. Out in public like this he kept his distance.

"I think I'll be going out tomorrow."

"Really? That's nice."

And she meant that from the bottom of her heart. He would spend the day out, far away from her, and she would take a mental vacation if she could just stop remembering...

He'd told her to wait for him while he returned to the dinning room. They'd only been gone for fifteen minutes, but she was in no state to be seen by family members. Light was less disheveled than she; as long as no one looked too closely they wouldn't suspect a thing.

It was a struggle to stay on the bed, to keep from snooping, but he would know if she touched so much as the spine of a book. She knew about the piece of paper in his doorway and the particular way he left the handle, but that was the extent of her knowledge. She was sure he had similar traps within the bedroom.

At his desk, for example, she noted that he'd left the key in the lock of the top drawer. To someone else it might have looked careless, but Light had never been inattentive. That key was there for a reason, likely to test the will of those who entered his room. No doubt there was something innocuous inside the drawer, he'd never put something he cared about within easy reach of others, but it was enough to call attention.

She wouldn't put it past him to apply reverse psychology to his methods though.

Whatever the case she didn't think it safe to touch anything and remained where she was, trying to clear her head enough to come up with a better plan...

Home again they were greeted at the door by their mother who fluttered nervously from one child to the other. She had not acclimated to the new dynamic in the household well. After the argument over dinner the atmosphere had become tense and the strain remained over the days that had passed since.

There was no consensus on Haruka's declaration. Sayu was in shock, Soichiro furious, Light resigned, and Sachiko in a muddled state of mind.

When their son had returned he explained that he'd not known about this part of Haruka's thoughts on her future and said that she seemed set on following through. He promised to continue trying to talk her out of moving, but made no guarantees. They were all well aware of Haruka's stubborn nature, but hoped her brother would be able to get through to her.

He'd returned upstairs following that debriefing, to talk to Haruka they all assumed, and they were left to debate over what could be going on in her head.

"Dinner will be on the table in about twenty minutes," she told them as they traveled up the staircase. Light replied with his usual good humor while Haruka barely nodded.

With a sigh Sachiko returned to the kitchen. There was nothing for her to do but hope that Light could bring his sister to her senses. There was nothing she could say, nothing that would change her mind, but maybe her daughter would take the advice of her twin.

The two had always been close, save the last few months, and she'd never been more glad for that connection. Where the rest of them failed to understand Haruka, Light could see to the heart of the matter.

Surely _he_ would be able to persuade her to at least rethink leaving home.

"Moving out?" Sachiko asked aloud with a sigh. "I really don't know what she could be thinking!"

It was something she knew was on the horizon, the day her children left home, but she hadn't expected it to come so soon or that one of the girls would be the first to leave.

Truthfully this wasn't so far outside the realm of possibility that she thought it impossible; Haruka displayed initiative at the strangest times, often leaving a trail of confusion in her wake. The things she thought important had always varied from that of the family.

Well, Light was on her case and his influence could do no harm, or so she thought. Had Sachiko been aware of what had actually happened when Light returned to his bedroom that night, had she had even an inkling as to what her perfect son had started, she may well have found herself in a casket...

On his way up the stairs he pointedly ignored the incessant chatter of the shinigami who followed after him; Ryuk felt compelled to comment on everything from Haruka's moving away to the unnatural flush on the face of the Death Note user.

"I didn't think you'd actually try it. I'm not for or against this, not really, but it _is_ interesting!"

He found Haruka where he'd left her, lying still on the bed. Her blouse was partiality unbuttoned, her hair a tangled mess and her lips bruised.

He knew she'd heard him enter, but she remained motionless and he used the opportunity to calculate their chances of getting away with a sexual relationship.

It was unlikely that their family would suspect anything was amiss without a serious misstep and that was where his concerns laid. He doubted Haruka would give it away, but had he missed something? Was there an unknown factor involved?

He didn't think so. On the off chance someone did become suspicious he would take care of them before it became a problem.

Confident in his ability to keep the situation in hand, Light returned his attention to the girl on his bed.

"Twins," he murmured as he moved toward her. "We've always been together." He reached out, touched her cheek and watched as her eyes fluttered. "You came second to be with me."

/~/~/~/~/

" _You came second to be with me."_

That was what he thought of her? It worked to her advantage, but was unexpected. The way he was able to turn everything she did into a reflection on himself made it seem as if he had a god complex. It also heightened her worry that he could have some link to Kira, but even now she couldn't think how it might be possible.

He had access to police records and it was conceivable that he could take advantage of that information, but still! How could he kill criminals from such a distance with a heart attack? How could anyone? Light didn't go anywhere but cram school and his time off was usually spent at home these days.

She had no proof except a rapid change in disposition that only she had noticed and that wasn't exactly convincing evidence.

Haruka was in her bedroom, she'd just finished uploading new pictures to her blog. The last few days had brought an influx of traffic because the girl she'd worked with earlier in the day, Amane, had posted her own updates to social media accounts about working with Haruka, proclaiming her excitement over meeting someone new.

If nothing else she was grateful for the exposure Misa offered. That day's shoot would be in a magazine, one that was popular; it was a first for the newcomer, but Misa had been in the business for a while and Haruka could remember having seen her on covers before.

"Misa would be glad to give you tips! Here, Misa will give you her number if she can have yours too!"

So, they'd exchanged cell numbers. Haruka wasn't sure what she'd ever want to call on Amane for, but it couldn't hurt to have that line of communication open.

With a deep sigh she looked to her door. He would soon come knocking, requesting her company. The family assumed he was busy trying to change her mind about moving, but the truth was they did very little speaking at all.

It was still a source of anxiety, but she'd come to terms with the new relationship. It was for the sake of the bigger picture and she had to stick it out. There was too much at stake here.

She was more convinced than ever that Light had something to do with the Kira incidents, yet still no definitive proof. She could pin her belief on nothing but an impression and she couldn't think of a way to make him drop hints without seeming like she was too interested.

If he was Kira he might kill her should she get too close to the truth.

The only way forward was to continue the ruse, pretend that she was just as in love with him as he'd deluded himself into thinking she was, and go along with their elicit meetings.

Nothing too intense had happened yet; it seemed even he had the sense not to cross the line, but he wasn't against heaving petting, encouraged the behavior in fact, and she worried that he would want more than she was willing to give sooner rather than later.

If there was one thing she could count on it was that Light would underestimate her. The demonstrated god complex demanded he believe himself superior and incapable of mistaking her feelings; as long as she could play the part he was expecting to see he would remain unaware of what she was after.

The knock came.

With shoulders squared she opened the door to face her brother and what she'd termed the 'sexy smirk'. It pained her to know that he could think to look at her in that way, but there was no other phrase for it. As much as she hated that it existed it functioned as a sign of his compliance. This was another chance to search for the older brother she'd once known.

"Haruka. Come to my room for a minute."

She was certain it would be longer than a minute.

/~/~/~/~/

He had her in his arms the second his door was locked. He stood holding her from behind, pressing kisses to her ear.

"I like your outfit today," he murmured. Tan shorts, thigh high plaid socks and a white cable knit sweater that hugged her curves. "But you've shown this to anyone willing to look. I wonder what else you're wearing, that no one but you has seen?"

One hand slid to her hip while the other moved to cover her mouth.

Alarm bells were ringing in Haruka's mind; something had changed. The atmosphere was heavy, oppressive, more so than it had ever been before. She'd been uncomfortable, to say the least, the last few days, but this was–

He kneaded her inner thigh, allowed his thumb to skim across the most intimate part of her and listened with satisfaction when she gasped.

"So, you felt that? This material, it's kind of thin. What are you wearing underneath? Let me see."

That was a demand, she knew it was, but how could she even begin to form coherent thoughts when he insisted on rubbing her _ther_ _e_?

What is he getting out of this? she asked herself as her legs wobbled. Why do this?

She couldn't answer those questions without asking.

With shaking hands she reached for his arm, the one that held it's hand over her lips, and weakly tugged it away.

"Why?" She hadn't meant to sound breathless.

He dragged a nail across her core. "Why? Because you _want me to_."

She shook her head.

"Yes Haruka, you want this and so do I. Your body wants this, can't you feel how wet you are for me? I can."

She tried, and failed, to protest. A small part of her realized that he was partially correct; her body was responding to his touch, but that wasn't her fault! It was natural. He was wrong. She didn't _want_ this, but how great would the danger be if she refused him?

If she could allow this, he would think her tied to him. He might even willingly give up information he would otherwise keep secret.

"I—I can't..."

"I know," he paused, pushed her forward, allowed her to stumble. "There's no need to rush, Haruka. You're afraid I'll ask you for sex, right? Not yet. For now I just want to see what you're wearing." He crossed his arms. "So. What will you do, Imōto-chan?"

She'd known what she would do days ago, if it came to this point and she still needed to know more.

Haruka gathered her resolve and turned to face the monster inhabiting the body of her brother. Had they not been related, had she ever held any deeper feelings for him, she would have thought him incredibly attractive. In that moment everything about him screamed lust. The way his eyes raked over her, the way he stared, it was near pornographic. It was very clear what he wanted from her was obedience and she would give it to him for the moment.

Rather than answer aloud she hooked her thumbs into the waist band of her shorts and pulled them down, forcing her eyes to remain on his.

"Ah, black lace," he stepped closer and reached out for the hem of her shirt. "Do you know, I think red would suit you better, but this is fine." She held her arms up as he pulled the sweater over her head. "Matching." He did not miss the touch of fire that lit her eyes, though he did misinterpret it. "No one else has ever seen you this way, _right_?"

A dangerous tone, but she could answer honestly. "Right. No one but you, Light," she whispered. A step closer. She was moving on instinct as she fingered the buttons on his shirt.

"Not this time, Haruka," he took both her hands in one of his and forced her back until she fell upon his bed. "Today I'm going to make you moan, make you twist, for _me_." He sat beside her prone form, ran his hand up her side. His breath was hot against her cheek as he leaned closer. "You'll feel as you've never felt before and you will _love me_ for it."

That was a clue. He was after her affection, but for what reason? She'd always loved him, he was her brother; there had to be more to it than that.

Coherent thought fled her mind he pressed his fingers against her center and he moved to kiss her stomach.

"Hey," she gasped. "Since when can you do things like this?"

"Does it matter? Do you like it?"

 _No_. And yes. But, no. Emphatically no.

She reached for his hands as she shook her head.

"You little liar," he whispered, stretching out to lie beside her. He cupped her cheek. "You're so flawless."

A compliment. Did he really mean it?

"But you can't lie to me."

It had been worth a try.

/~/~/~/~/

She learned nothing more of value; even if he'd said anything enlightening she didn't think she would have understood it. As horrified as she was mentally, physically she'd been putty in his hands. Even now, several hours later, she felt weak. It had been a struggle to make it through supper; Light acted concerned when she excused herself from the table first, only to tilt on her way out the door, and 'helped' her upstairs.

"Haruka, maybe it was too much for you?" he'd whispered in her ear.

She wouldn't admit to that, but her stony glare amused him.

" _...you will love me for it."_

Thinking of it now, as she lay in her own bed, she wondered what he'd really meant. It wasn't just something he wanted, he'd been demanding it of her. He'd made her fall to pieces not to make her happy, but for himself.

" _You're so flawless."_

Implying that he was as well, she felt sure of that. He wouldn't have attributed that concept to her had she not been his twin.

Why did that matter to him? What good was flawless and why did he think he was?

It seemed like everything he did made her feel with more certainty that he _was_ Kira, but she didn't have stable grounds to make that claim.

She sat up and balled her hands into tight fists while pulling her knees to her chest.

"This is bullshit," she hissed. "What the hell is he doing and how is he doing it?!"

The fact was she had no evidence to convict him excepting his incredible change of heart when it came to herself and in reality that wasn't something that couldn't happen on it's own; that kind of shift did not necessitate his being Kira. It was from the details, the ones no one else had observed, that her belief arose.

His huge ego for one. He was able to hide it with near perfection, but she knew it was there and growing as the days went by. Eating lunch with him had allowed her to see the way he looked down on everyone around them. He'd never been like that before. Light had always valued people who were trying their best, but it seemed like that didn't matter anymore. No one was good enough.

He also had access to confidential police information. Their father used the home server for work related files. She knew it was all password protected, but the code was probably mundane and easily guessed. She doubted it was something that could stop Light from finding his way in if he wanted to; their father wasn't exactly creative and he trusted them all implicitly which, if Light really was Kira, would pose a serious problem.

Dad would never suspect him, she thought. Not in a million years. No more than he'd suspect Sayu, Mom or I.

There was also his level of intelligence. Light was still in high school, but he could have gone on to college if he'd wanted to. No entrance exam would hold him back, this was a personal choice.

He'd wanted to join the police force; with his strong sense of justice he would have done unbelievably well. She wondered now if that same feeling had propelled him into the role of Kira, someone who'd been able to take justice into his own hands because he'd been granted the power to do so.

That was the real hole in her theory. The ability to kill from a distance with a heart attack. What was behind all of that? How was it possible?

Out of bed she sprang. There would be no sleeping tonight, at least not for a while yet, and she thought her time better spent in research.

"L, world's best detective..." she muttered as she typed in her search terms. As she'd expected there still wasn't much to find, but by widening the parameters she was able to learn about other detectives many believed to hold the number two and three rankings. "So, L takes cases he's interested in. This Eraldo Coil is high priced and Deneuve seems to deal in missing persons. But..." There wasn't much. Like L, there was a lack of contact information or specifics available. "Suspicious."

It couldn't be that they were actually–

" _That_ is a leap of logic," she said softly. She had no reason to think they were actually one and the same, but the idea, once planted, refused to be uprooted. "Doesn't really matter though."

No, it didn't matter. Even if her intuition was right it only made L more incredible.

"I wish I could contact him." He would know what to do with her information, whether or not her observations meant anything. Surely he could use anything and everything available and her perspective was unique.

He'd ordered their family followed, so he was already collecting data on them.

Out of all the people in the police force, of all the family members she knew, she could think of no one who would be more suspicious than her brother. His intelligence and incontestable sense of justice, on display with the couple of times he'd helped the police force, should be enough to tip the scale in his direction and, if that was the case, it wouldn't be too long before their household was under more direct surveillance.

"Wire taps? Maybe cameras too."

She felt sure a deeper police investigation was on the horizon. Her father would agree to it, though only because he would be adamant that they had nothing to do with Kira and because of his dedication to his profession.

"Fun times," she rested her chin on her fist and sighed. Still, she thought those things a ways off; that gave her time to craft a message to L.

/~/~/~/~/

 _ **L**_ ,

 _ **If you're reading this letter it means wiretaps have been put in place, likely cameras as well. I'm not surprised by it, but I think you should know that my brother is probably also aware of this. The truth is he's a lot smarter than I am, but I've always been better at looking to the future so I might have been a step ahead of him this time.**_

 _ **It would be best if you don't tell my father what's in this note (I'm assuming you're working together in some capacity).**_

 _ **This is disturbing to me on multiple levels, but let me start by saying I am reasonably confident that Yagami, Light, my older brother and twin, is Kira. I can't tell you how he commits the murders, but I can see changes in him. No one else seems to have noticed, but he's different with me, especially when we're alone (go ahead and take a guess at what that means, World's Greatest Detective-sama).**_

 _ **Maybe it was stupid of me, but I joined in the "game". As of right now he's unaware that I'm playing, he thinks he's leading me on and unless I make a huge mistake he won't realize the truth. He's too full of himself to imagine that I might be the one playing him.**_

 _ **You already know that he has access to confidential police data, that he's incredibly intelligent and that he seems perfect, but please believe me when I say that he is FAR from it. Though, I'm sure that in his mind he's perfection incarnate.**_

 _ **Maybe something has happened between now (for me) and now (for you), maybe everything is different and the case is closed, but I doubt it.**_

 _ **So, that's all I guess. I'm sorry I don't have anything but personal experience to give you, I'm trying to find out more, but he's very guarded and I don't think he wants anyone, not even me, to know the truth.**_

/~/~/~/~/

Haruka hid the letter in the central air vent that protruded from the area above her doorway. If a camera or microphone was to be placed it would go there, assuming there was only one; if they wanted to be thorough multiple placements would be made, but she thought her choice a safe bet.

By that time it was morning. She'd tried to sleep and settled for rest instead when dreams evaded her, considering her options. There wasn't much she could do except keep to the path in front of her.

"I'm going out today." That was what he said as he left the house.

"Ooo, on a date?" Sayu had asked.

"Yeah, actually," he'd looked to her then and she'd turned her head away, forced a pout, ignoring him as he smirked at her when the youngest sibling moved toward the kitchen.

"Mom! Did you hear that? Light's going on a date!"

Haruka saw him off at the door, accepted a quick kiss and then he disappeared out the gate. Her shoulders sagged with relief as he walked out of sight.

Finally.

It would have been nice to look through his bedroom, but she didn't trust her ability to go undetected so, with no other options, she decided to spend the day thinking of anything but Light.

Her cell phone rang soon after his departure, a call from a friend asking if she had time to wander the shopping district. She agreed to the meet up and left the house at eleven fifteen in the outfit she'd worn on the night Light had... Taken it too far. She wondered if she would ever be able to associate the sweater with anything else.

"Nope," she muttered. "Not thinking about that. My clothes had nothing to do–" she paused with a gasp, her hands flying to her forehead. A pulsing pain rippled from temple to temple and she leaned heavily against a surrounding wall.

A hand, brown sleeve... A puddle of blood.

It was over as suddenly as it came. The throbbing faded and she quickly called home. Sayu picked up on the third ring.

"Hello? Yagami residence."

"Hey, Sayu, it's me. Sorry for calling, but I felt like I forgot something. Everything is okay there, right?"

"Ah, Haruka! Yeah, everything's fine!"

"Mom's okay too?"

"Yup," she popped the 'p'. "So, what did you think you forgot?"

She wracked her brain, but came up blank. "Uh, I don't know. Just be on the look out for something of mine and call if you find it."

"Okay, whatever. Later then!"

She called her father next.

"Haruka?"

"Yeah, uh, I was just wondering, what kind of jacket did you wear this morning?"

A sigh. "Haruka, I'm sorry, but I really don't have time for this."

"Sorry, sorry! Just tell me, was it brown?"

"Yes."

She stiffened. "Is it two shades of brown? Like darker near the wrist area? Also, are you planning on wearing it outside any time soon?"

"No Haruka, it is not two shades of brown and I don't think so. I'll likely be at Headquarters until this evening if not later."

"Oh. Well. That's good then. Stick to that plan, okay? Bye, Dad!"

She imagined him shaking his head as he put his mobile down, apologizing to his colleagues for the interruption. He'd definitely had her on speaker phone. If he got home in time for dinner he might question her, but it was worth the easing of her mind.

That left one family member, but Light hadn't worn a coat like one she'd seen and the hand was nothing like his. It wasn't Light lying on the road, but perhaps he was somehow involved?

She wished she'd thought to ask him where he was spending the day; as it was she didn't want to call him, that would seem desperate and he would definitely misread her intentions.

No. She would go on with the day and later, when they were home again and he came to bring her to his room, she would tell him of what she'd experienced. That would put a hold on whatever he had planned for her in the darkness of his bedroom and maybe by then she would know what she'd seen.

In an effort to put the vision behind her Haruka continued to the meeting point. Her friends were already there and their greetings enthusiastic. However, they hadn't been together long when she noticed a news broadcast airing on the television in the boutique they were pursuing.

"We interrupt the regularly scheduled program with breaking news. A bus-jacking incident has just been reported. It appears that the suspect was killed at the scene after being hit by a car..."

 **Other Facts**

 _ **Humans existed before the shinigami.**_


	5. Tactics

_**A/N: Onward!**_

 _Chapter 5_

 _Tactics_

"...it is unknown how many passengers were upon the vehicle at the time of the incident, but as of now we have no reports of injuries to bystanders. It is believed that the crime was committed by this man," a picture came onto the screen, "Kiichiro, Osoreda, who is suspected of being involved in an attempted bank robbery earlier this week..."

"Wow!"

"That's so crazy!"

"...as we reported the hijacker was struck by a car upon exiting the bus. We now take you to a report from our corespondent at the scene, but we would first like to caution you that these images are live and may be inappropriate for some viewers."

A man in a brown coat lying in a puddle of blood.

"Kiichiro... Osoreda?" What did he have to do with her family?

"Huh? Was that person someone you knew, Haruka?"

"What? Oh, no. I think I heard the name before though, probably because of that robbery they mentioned."

"Ah, your father's on the police force. I bet you heard it from him, right?"

"Hm, maybe. I don't really remember. Anyway, its not like there's anything I can do about it."

The others nodded and took her dismissal of the incident as permission to move onto other matters.

They continued their shopping, ate lunch at a small cafe and made an impromptu stop at a Karaoke spot when Minna received an invitation to a get together that was lacking female participants.

"He's a friend of my brother. They're all in college!" she told them with evident excitement. "I guess some girls canceled on them."

"So," Haruka spoke skeptically. "We get to see boys other girls _didn't_ want to see?"

"Aw, don't be like that! They probably needed to study or something!"

In the end it wasn't as bad as she'd feared, but neither was it something she hoped to do again soon; as Minna said they were college aged, but Haruka doubted their abilities in the classroom. They'd seemed dense and too free with their compliments.

"None of them measure up to Light!" Yuuki complained afterward.

Haruka bit her tongue as Sakura agreed, "Yeah, it's not even fair to them. They didn't stand a chance."

"Well," she interjected. "It's getting late, already after three. I think it's time I head home for the day!"

They tried to convince her to stay, paid her well wishes when she insisted on leaving, and asked for promises that they would reconvene later on during winter break.

"I'm sure we'll meet up again!" she laughed. "We don't have school until after the new year starts. It would be a waste to spend all my time in the house."

Goodbyes were exchanged and Haruka began the trek homeward.

"Light," she grumbled. He was there, up ahead. She considered doubling back, but knew he would find it strange if he ever found out. Instead she called out to him, "Light!" It was better to be close.

She saw him still momentarily, before turning to smile at her. "Haruka. So, you were out today, too?"

"Mhmm. Minna called right after you left. Actually, I've got something to talk to you about, later though."

"Something–?"

"Yeah, _something_."

He seemed to get the message, had the audacity to look concerned. "Is it _something_ we can talk about now?" he asked.

She shook her head. "Not really. It'd be better to discuss it at home. Oh, and here, take my bags. They're getting heavy." She pushed her purchases into his hands. "So, how was your date?"

She took note of the pause before his answer. "It was interrupted."

By a bus-jacking perhaps?, she thought sarcastically.

"That's too bad." What would it mean if her perceptions turned out to be correct? That would still fall far from unequivocal proof of Kira's identity, but it would be a curious twist of fate for him to be involved.

The man, Kiichiro, Osoreda, had not died of a heart attack, but he was a criminal on the run. He met the qualifications for the type of person Kira would have killed. The ability to kill from a distance, was it regulated to heart attacks?

That was a frightening thought. If not, how many more deaths could be attributed to Kira?

/~/~/~/~/

They returned to find the house empty, though a note was left telling of Sayu's being invited to stay with a friend for the night and their mother's visit to a neighbor; she would back in time for supper.

"Alone," Light mused. "For hours. What will we do with our time?"

"Um, study?"

"Each other? Maybe."

"That wasn't what I meant..." Now was definitely the time to distract him. "I saw something, on my way to meet with my friends."

"You _saw_ something?"

"Yes."

He placed her bags on the landing, sat there himself and held out his arms in invitation.

She dared not reject the offer and found herself enveloped in his embrace.

"I don't know if you heard about it, the bus-jacking, but I saw a hand in a brown sleeve, lying in a puddle of blood. I wasn't far from home yet so I called to be sure Mom and Sayu were alright. I even called Dad, on his cell phone, to ask what color coat he'd worn today. He probably thinks I lost my mind. Now, I think it was the criminal."

She found his lack of response interesting and remained unaware of Ryuk's raucous laughter.

"There was a newscast about it when I was in a shop. They had a live shot of the scene, so I saw the man. The coat looked right. Actually, this might sound wrong, but I was relieved. Now I only wonder why I saw it at all."

This time she waited for him to react.

It took Light several minutes to collect his thoughts, to rein in his emotions. He hadn't expected this. It had been years since Haruka last spoke of seeing death and even back then it hadn't been a common occurrence.

Rather than answer he tightened his hold, forced her head back and kissed her.

This was one of the few true pleasures in his life. Killing criminals gave him power, but not much enjoyment. Reading what people said about Kira on message boards was growing old. The unspoken competition with L was somewhat gratifying, but _this,_ this was what he looked forward to.

He'd grown used to tuning Ryuk out, so even though the shinigami made loud, obscene comments, he wasn't overly bothered by the presence of an observer. If anything it made the experience more of a thrill.

Tongues intertwined and she moaned his name.

He wanted her. Wanted to take her fully right then and there, in the entrance way. Half of him couldn't have cared less that a family member might walk in at any moment, but the other remained rational. At least it did, until she turned and pushed him to the floor.

She sat atop him now, wriggling her hips against his and he lost himself to the sensation.

Haruka saw the moment Light's mind was overcome with desire, watched as he began to pant her name. So, this was what it took to make him let his guard down? That was a relief; it was less risque than she'd thought it would be. She hadn't even needed to remove clothing.

She leaned forward, whispered, "I'm so glad you're safe." She traced her shell of his ear with her tongue, sucked on his earlobe and ground her pelvis into his. His fingers gripped the back of her sweater tightly. "So glad..."

His breath hitched when she moved away. "No," his voice was hoarse. "Don't stop."

She stood over him, considered their position. This was where she wanted him, tied to her so completely that he would let go of his grandiose pride.

"Haruka!"

A step, over his head and onto the stairs. "We can't stay here like this, anyone could come home," as she spoke she glanced over her shoulder, looked down on her brother who lay breathless and wild eyed on the hardwood of the landing. This was wrong on so many levels, so entirely screwed up that she didn't think the situation could ever be made right, but this was where she found herself. It was better to be in a position of power than on the floor.

He stared after her, aghast, as she ascended to the upper level of the house, sat up in time to see his bedroom door open.

He followed immediately.

/~/~/~/~/

To be perfectly honest, Ryuk wasn't sure he _wanted_ to be involved in this particular escapade.

"Hey, Light, do you care if I go–"

"Shut up."

/~/~/~/~/

Haruka took those few moments alone to craft a plan of attack.

He was in an unnatural state. She doubted Light had ever been truly aroused in his life. He'd never had an interest in that kind of thing, she knew he'd thought it a waste of time, though she wouldn't have put it past him to have engaged in racy activities just to gain the experience in recent weeks. Even if he had he would have approached the issue with surgical precision and remained in control of himself for the duration of the act.

 _She_ had no such experience. No boyfriends to speak of, no friend's with benefits, nothing. Like her brother she'd not been intrigued by the prospect and thought it a useless entertainment. She wasn't so virginal that she didn't know anything about pleasuring a man, but her knowledge was limited to things she'd read.

At this point it might not matter. He wanted what he could get from her and she didn't think he would argue against what she chose to do as long as she brought him to completion.

In his post-pleasure haze he might agree to show her what he'd found within the police files; she was still against looking herself, but if Light refused she would take the risk. She had to know if Kira had other ways of killing.

He entered the room then, grabbing her roughly and pulling her close for just a moment before flinging her to the bed. She landed on her backside with a bounce.

"Hey!"

She worried he would be angry, that would have been an appropriate reaction for Kira and his actions suggested he might be, but when his lips crashed down upon her own she realized that her fear was unneeded. Even if he was upset with her previous actions he was too far gone to care enough to do anything about it.

"Stop, stop, stop!" she insisted, pushing him back. "Just wait a minute! I can't do anything until your pants are off."

He stilled, for a full thirty seconds he seemed unable to respond, and then he was telling her to pull out the second encyclopedia to the right as he discarded his clothing.

"What the– Since when do you hide stuff like this in here?" It was a lubricant.

"Since you started leaving me to take care of problems like this myself."

 _That_ was unintentional and troubling, but also appreciated; he hadn't forced participation out of her.

"If you think that's a compliment–," she broke off; the words got stuck in her throat. She was unprepared for the sight of him.

Part of her wanted desperately to flee the room. To run for her bedroom, lock the door, pack a bag and escape out the window. But, that was an impossibility. What she needed to do was turn off her thought process.

And so she did.

/~/~/~/~/

This was far better than anything he'd ever done for himself and he realized the difference was in who handled him; had it been someone else, a borrowed lover, he knew that he would not have found such gratification.

Her hands, all she used were her hands and yet he was reduced to a panting, sweaty mess. How could she do this to him? How had she gotten this power over him?

Sliding up and down, pausing, making him grit his teeth when she lightly ran her nail over the tip...

If anyone was evil here it was Haruka and the poison she offered was too tempting to refuse.

/~/~/~/~/

He lay motionless and spent for several minutes afterward, during which time Haruka had to quell the compulsion to leave and wash her hands. She settled instead for a tissue and hand sanitizer.

She asked for the favor while he was attempting to regain his composure.

"Light," she'd stretched out beside him on the bed, leaned close and whispered in his ear. "Light, you have to let me see what the police are doing. I know you've already looked and not knowing is driving me crazy."

A weak glare. "Was all that just for _this_? A bribe?"

"Not _all_."

The thought that they were too much alike crossed his mind, but it was not enough to make him deny her and he doubted that he had the ability at all when she turned his face toward hers to kiss him.

"Fine."

It was a concern. He hadn't anticipated this level of attachment. It was one thing to want Haruka, another to need her. There was nothing she could physically give him that he couldn't get from another, yet he didn't want it from anyone else. She was the one he desired, it was her touch he craved.

He'd intended her to be his possession. Instead, it seemed that she was becoming his obsession.

/~/~/~/~/

The week that passed between her foray with Light and the day the follower disappeared was one she hoped to forget as the years went by. Though a few favorable things happened in the area of her work-life, Haruka felt the situation with her brother outweighed that progress.

He was insatiable. He took every spare moment she had and crushed it. The tail sent by L might have been gone, but she had a new stalker now. Everything she did had to be vetted by him first; he _needed_ to know where she was going, who would be there and how long she would be gone. She feared for those she worked with and avoided giving names.

At least he'd kept his promise about showing her the police files, though she got the feeling he didn't want to do it with the way he put it off. In the end it had taken another round of 'convincing'.

The information she read made it plain to her that Kira could kill in more ways than one, but she didn't tell Light that. In fact she lied straight out as she pretend she couldn't make sense of what she was looking at.

"I mean I get it, but I don't _get it_."

He accepted the falsehood. "It's not easy to understand." She thought he sounded relieved. "It doesn't really matter."

" _It doesn't really matter."_

She didn't didn't believe that he actually thought that, not for a second, and it only stacked the deck against him. He was too eager to placate her curiosity, too happy to tell her lies.

She could hardly stand how stupid he thought she was.

/~/~/~/~/

Their father was home for dinner, the first time in a long while, and he used the opportunity to call an assembly. They were all seated at the dining room table, waiting for him to begin.

"Um, so, whats with the family meeting, Dad?" Sayu asked as she rested her chin on her palms, elbows on the table.

"I figured you're going to find out sooner or later, so I might as well tell you now. I don't want you to be alarmed, I'm sure you've heard of this Kira investigation, well I'm currently in charge of it."

This information was not a surprise to Haruka, she'd long ago guessed this was the case. The only question had been how long it would take him to tell them officially.

Sayu was impressed. "What?! Are you serious? That's totally awesome, Dad! You're the best cop ever!"

"That's not quite the point I'm trying to make. You see, the truth is the FBI sent twelve of their agents to Japan, to assist us in finding Kira, and all of them died yesterday."

"Does that mean they were all killed by Kira?" She withstood the impulse to kick her brother. How did he manage to sound so sincere, so worried? His tone made her second guess all her suspicions. She wanted to be wrong so badly, wanted to believe that he was truly just as surprised as he seemed, but she couldn't. There were too many things going on behind the scenes for her to allow wishes to blind her to reality.

Light _was_ Kira. She couldn't allow his performance to sway her into false security; his behavior toward herself was more than enough to prove that something was wrong and with all things considered she couldn't deny the truth. Though Haruka still lacked the evidence to convict him in a court of law, even in the court of public opinion, _she'd_ had more than enough unwanted experiences to find him guilty on a personal level.

"What!?" Sayu was appalled by Light's insight.

Soichiro continued, "What I'm saying is there's a chance that Kira will actually try to kill anyone who comes after him. His crimes are ruthless and more frightening than anything we've seen. Many detectives have already quit."

This statement prompted pleas from her sister and mother, asking that Soichiro do the same. Predictably he refused, stating that he would not bow out due to fear, that he would stand against the evil of Kira.

Haruka half-expected this to evoke an honest response in Light, a hint of anger or something, but he acted his role well.

"I think it's honorable of you, Dad. I'm proud to be able to call you my father," he stood from the table. "And if anything should ever happen to you, I'm going to find Kira and make sure he gets executed."

She stood once the door closed behind him. "I'm with Light on this. I'm really proud of your commitment, Dad." Unsurprised, but proud all the same. "There's a risk, but if he's killed people who aren't even criminals isn't being alive a risk at this point? All it takes is for Kira to think you might be a threat and you're a goner!"

Sachiko appealed to the older girl to be a bit more sensitive, "Haruka please, don't be so callous," but the request was rebuffed.

"Me? Callous? Hey, I'm not the one ticking people off a kill list–"

"Haruka!"

"–I'm just saying that backing off only makes people seem weak and Kira acts like the type of person who will eventually go after people like that, too. I mean, 'support me fully or die' sounds like his motto to me. Really childish."

"That may be true, but there is a time and a place for everything," her father fixed her with a hard look. "And this was neither."

"Whatever," she shrugged, turned and made for the doorway. "If you can't tell me I'm wrong then the point stands." When no one offered further comment she left the room to find Light just outside the door. "You heard all that?"

"I did."

"You think I'm wrong?"

"I didn't say that, but I do think you scared Sayu. Tact exists for a reason, Haruka."

"In this case I think its better she hear it straight. She's not stupid and sugarcoating won't make it easier for her if Dad _does_ die. You heard her, she hadn't even considered the idea. She just thought it was cool that he was on the case! I know she's young, but there are some things you can't hide." She used her feigned annoyance as grounds to stomp up the stairs and into her own room. She doubted he would come to her for company when she so obviously in a bad mood. That gave her an evening alone.

/~/~/~/~/

She used her time to focus more fully on life outside the home.

Light was a consuming preoccupation, but she'd refused to put aside her work for him. He'd expressed jealousy, indirectly told her he would prefer that she give it up, but she'd been clear that there was no chance of that.

The next several days would be busy. The agency was in the process of collecting resumes so she could choose a manager; the fervor in Kinomoto's voice had been distinct when she called to speak to Haruka earlier in the day.

"We've gotten so many offers for you Haruka-chan! Really, it's unprecedented for our small company. You're definitely going to need someone to negotiate things directly," she'd paused before adding, "You could turn this into a real career, you know? Not everyone has that ability."

She'd didn't speak of her plans, her mother was in hearing range, but she did take the remark as a sign that she was moving in the right direction.

Manipulation, persuasion, whatever term used, was her one real talent. From the time she realized where her natural ability lay she'd planned on using the skill to it's fullest advantage. Modeling had fallen into her lap and she thought it foolish to pass up the opportunities it offered.

There were so many idiots out there looking for someone to follow. If not her, then who? Some _other_ idiot, like Ryuga, Hideki, would come along and guide the masses over the edge of a cliff. Making them harm their health with bogus diets. Making them go out and buy worthless junk. Making them feel inadequate with one errant comment.

"Tch." It was annoying. Why was power always bestowed on the imbeciles? They were weak minded themselves and in no condition to lead the way for anyone else. They caved to the slightest pressure of their handlers, let everything go their heads and eventually ended up out of the business, on one of those "Where Are They Now?" shows that no one really watched.

Forgotten. Unnecessary. Their stardom was fleeting, but they were too dazzled to realize it so their time in the limelight was squandered. They labored under the delusion that they would forever be wanted.

Haruka knew better. People got tired of seeing the same faces day in and day out. It wasn't enough to endorse products or go on talk shows and in the end overexposure killed many a rising star. What really mattered was how well the audience could connect with the face in a magazine. Did they feel like that person was close enough to understand them or were they too far away to care?

She could create the illusion that she was near. She was just a normal high school girl with average grades. She was someone they could connect with and, if her blog's progress was any indication, they were willing to accept her as their new idol.

The trick was keeping the momentum going and then maintaining herself at the highest tier possible. It was inevitable that some would fall away, jealousy would likely be the driving force, but if she could hold onto a majority her star would continue to shine.

She wasn't so narcissistic as to think this was all done under her own power. She'd just hit the market at the right moment; she had enough confidence in herself to believe that she could have done well even if times were different, but this exponential growth was due to a perfect storm scenario. The public was beginning to grow tried of the current faces, the whole Kira thing had everyone on edge, and she'd been dealt the best cards possible with the knowledge of how to play them.

Her schedule book was rather empty, but if Kinomoto hadn't been exaggerating then it would soon be full.

Haruka turned her attention her computer, opened a browser and began a new apartment search. With the way things were going she wouldn't need the help or approval of her family to strike out on her own. She'd been putting away most of her earnings, spending just enough to keep up with the trends, and she'd saved quite a bit. It would be sufficient to get her into a place and, if the next couple of months were as full of work as it seemed they would be, she would have more than enough to afford a modest space.

There were procedures to follow; she would need to choose an area and meet with a real estate agent, tour the apartments and secure a guarantor. That might prove to be difficult. It would be best for her father to fill that role, as Chief of Police and a well respected man she didn't think there would be a problem with his signing onto the duty, and there were guarantor companies, but she held little faith in operations like that. They could very well be thugs working in the gray area of the law; she'd heard her father speak of similar cases.

Perhaps she'd get lucky and find a place that didn't require a guarantor.

In either case the problems would be solved in one way or another. For the moment she needed to continue working hard and put her effort into gaining notoriety.

/~/~/~/~/

Light disregard her irritated attitude and came to sit in her room about an hour after the family meeting.

"You can't get involved in the Kira case."

His request surprised her. Was it because he thought she might have enough determination to get to the bottom of it? Was he concerned that she might find him out?

It was a bit late for that.

"Oh, really? You know, saying something like that only makes me want to do the _opposite_." She saw his annoyance. "If you can make that kind of declaration, saying you'll basically take Dad's place on the case, then I have the right to do the same. He's my father too. Even so, I know my limits. I'm not cut out for that kind of thing, but that doesn't mean I wouldn't try to avenge Dad if he died."

Her answer was expected, but that did nothing to appease him. He would hate to have to kill her and, at this point, seriously doubted his ability to do so. Should she learn that he was Kira... What would her reaction to that be? Haruka was pragmatic. Surely this would make sense to her, surely she would accept him, perhaps love him even more for it.

"I don't want to break the law and I would probably have to do that to find out anything else. It's not like I'm investigating now, but if something happens to Dad I can't promise I won't try."

"I guess I can accept that, but Haruka, what do you think about it all? I mean, you must be worried."

"Worried? I guess, kind of. Not for myself really, but for Dad? Sure. I mean Kira's killed people who aren't criminals, what would stop someone like that from killing police officers?"

He didn't like that answer. It implied that she against Kira, but it also made sense. She was unaware of his role, didn't realize that the FBI agents could have led to his downfall.

"Not for yourself though?"

"No. Not yet."

"What do you mean by that?"

She spun slowly in her chair. "Hmm, I guess I do get nervous thinking about what Kira might do to intimidate the police. What if they start closing in and he goes after family members to scare them into hiding? Sayu and I would be toast."

This line of thinking irked him; she was too close to the truth. That was the kind of thing he might be forced to do eventually. A last resort. A counter measure.

"I don't think Kira would do that, not without feeling very threatened at least. It doesn't fit with his style."

She shrugged. "Maybe, but that's not an easy thought to live with. Sayu doesn't think that way, I doubt it's occurred to her that she might be in danger, but we're the soft targets in the family. The daughters. Sayu is probably more at risk than I am. Not that it would actually hurt any differently, but it's more powerful to kill the baby. I mean, can you imagine _Sayu_ dead? I might kill myself for letting it happen!"

To think that she would take her own life was unacceptable.

"Suicide is not an option. Would you really do that to Mom and Dad? To me?"

"I might. She's my _imōto_ , Light. The only one I've got. It's different for you, even for Mom and Dad. You can't understand how I feel about her."

Haruka realized this was a dangerous tactic. If he doubted her sincerity everything would go up in smoke, but this was a chance to secure the safety of her sister. Light wouldn't kill _her_ , he was too attached, but Sayu was fair game. Whatever had happened to Light had changed who he was on the base level. If he wanted to punish their father at some point Sayu was the likely target.

"If Sayu goes, I'm going too."

"I'd have you on suicide watch before you got the chance." His reply was immediate and firm.

"You can try, but don't think I haven't thought this through. For all you know I'm hiding a lethal weapon." Like you are, she thought. He had to be! What it was she didn't know, but he had some kind of device that allowed him to kill without being caught.

That was the last straw for Light. Enraged by her easy talk of a self-initiated death he stood to loom over her, but she didn't seem affected by his anger. Instead she remained defiant, stared back at him and said, "I would hate to leave you, but I would hate for Sayu to leave me even more."

/~/~/~/~/

The things she'd said weren't exactly true. She had no suicidal thoughts, no plans to end her life even if the rest of her family passed away. Still, she would do what she could to keep that from happening and if convincing Light that Sayu was necessary kept the girl alive she had no problem doing it.

In Haruka's estimation, of all her family members, Sayu was the one who deserved death the least. She was young, lively, and sweet. Soichiro was in a dangerous line of work, Sachiko was getting on in years, Light was probably a mass murderer and, as for herself, she was a manipulative brat. Any immaturity displayed by her sister, any lack of forethought, could be attributed to her youth; Sayu did not deserve to die, but Haruka didn't trust Light to keep their sibling alive.

He'd seemed to believe her words, his emotional display was proof enough, and to her relief it seemed that Sayu would be safe for the time being.

In an effort to stem his wrath, and to distract him, she'd tugged at his slacks; he wasn't so furious that he refused the offer, but he _had_ pushed for more than hand-to-cock contact and she'd felt obligated to comply.

So, Haruka had given her first blow job her to older brother who hadn't seemed perturbed by her lack of experience. If anything he'd been smug about his position in the beginning, though by the end of it he'd had little control of the things coming out of his mouth.

" _Haruka_." He'd panted, groaned, moaned, twitched and she'd moved away before he could cum. That was _not_ going to happen.

The need to reciprocate was then brought to her attention, but she hadn't expected him to _use his mouth_. He'd been too insistent for her to turn him down, he would have found it questionable, and by this time she'd gained practice in disengaging her rational mind.

When she could pretend that he wasn't Light she was able to almost enjoy the experience, before reality came crashing down around her once more. In the end he was still her twin, a person she'd known all her life.

Of all the things that could have happened, of all the paths that she could have taken, why was this the one before her?

Why did Light have to be Kira? Why did he have to change so completely? What happened to facilitate all of this in the first place?

Those were questions she didn't have answers to and she found herself doubting that she would ever find them.

 **Death Note Facts**

The Note purposely enhances the personality traits of human users in a negative way.


	6. Unraveling Overcast

_Chapter 6_

 _Unraveling Overcast_

 **Disclaimer: If YouToo is a real company, I don't own it.**

Day start.

Day end.

Day start.

Day end.

Morning, noon and night.

Light, Light, Light, Light, Light!

Every day was the same. Every day revolved around Light. Even when she spent the hours away from home, either working or with her friends, he was never far from her mind.

"Thanks," she stamped the slip of paper and took the package from the delivery man.

"No problem, miss. Have a nice day!"

"And you as well."

Sayu poked her head into the hallway as the front door closed. "Did you order something?"

"No, I'm not sure what this is, but it's addressed to me from the agency so-"

"Open it quick!"

At the moment he was upstairs, doing who knew what in his room. She thought it likely he was plotting new ways to make her loose her mind.

"What is it?"

"Sayu, stop breathing down my neck! Take a step back, okay?"

"Okay, okay, but hurry up!"

He wouldn't leave her alone! Coming into her room at night, expecting her to do the same, she couldn't even get a full night's sleep with him around. She was more anxious than ever to move out of the family home.

 _ **Haruka,**_

 _ **You've got an offer for a banded deal! This was sent to the office so I'm forwarding it to you. Enclosed are some products from YouToo. Try them out and then decide! Sorry again about pushing back the manager meeting, but I've put some resumes in here for you to consider.**_

 _ **Sincerely,**_

 _ **Kinomoto, Asami**_

"YouToo?!" Sayu was ecstatic as she pawed through the contents of the box. "That's a really expensive makeup brand! They sent you so much stuff!"

Two eye pallets, one called Celebration, the other Nocturnal, a set of brushes, and more.

"Their mascara, their eyeliner, their lipstick and gloss... SO LUCKY!" Sayu bolted from the room and Haruka could hear her bellow up the sitars, "Hey Light! Look what Haruka got!" He'd been invited to intrude here too.

She sighed as her sister launched herself onto the couch, snacking on potato chips and likely spreading crumbs as she went.

"Sayu, take this bag of clothes and go to the Police station. It's for you father."

" _What_? Does it have to be _now_?"

"Your father's been pulling overnighters with no change of clothes so you're going to bring these to him."

"But M _ahhom_ , I totally promised my friends that I'd go out with them today!"

"Why don't I go? I could use a break."

"Thanks Light! I owe you one next time!" She chomped into another chip.

You owe me a heck of a lot more than you owe him, Haruka thought acerbically. I saved your life and you don't even know it.

Now here he was playing the perfect son, the good older brother. Offering to do a favor for his youngest sister and standing over the shoulder of the other to see what she'd been given.

He made Haruka sick. Everything about this person was false. His acting abilities were off the charts, to this day no one else suspected him, and it seemed like she would never find conclusive evidence to use against him.

"They want you to promote them?" He'd taken her letter.

She shrugged, unwilling to answer. With every hour that passed it grew more difficult to speak to him, harder to pretend that she was as clueless as the rest of the family. It was his preference for her that kept her safe, she knew it was. Had he not been so addicted he would have seen through her act. For now he remained blinded by his ego, unable to conceive of what she was actually trying to do, but one mistake was all it would take.

If Kira could kill people in ways other than heart attacks, and she felt sure he could, then her death might seem like a complete accident.

"Yeah!" Sayu provided commentary in her sister's silence. "YouToo is really popular, but also pricey. You can't just buy it at the drug store, right? You have to go to specialty shops to get their stuff. This is so cool, Haruka! Light, tell her how cool it is!"

His smile was too bright. The kiss he placed on her cheek too firm.

"Hey! Kiss me on the cheek too!"

But they didn't notice.

"It's always nice to see you three getting along! I'm glad you're so close. When I was young I hoped for a family like this. It seems my dreams came true!"

A happy family? They must have seemed that way. To anyone looking in that was what they were. Sure, Soichiro was cast in the role of a workaholic, but he was with the police and no deficiency on that front would be forgiven. His job was demanding, but his family was perfect. A loving, devoted wife. An incredible, brilliant son. A daughter making her way into the public eye and another daughter just getting her start in life.

Perfect. It was all perfect. Maybe so perfect that it would tip L off. He was billed the world's greatest detective, but would he see what everyone else missed? Was he really _that_ good?

Haruka hoped he was. She hoped he saw through the mask on her brother's face, the one she wore herself, and put a stop to Kira.

Justice needed to be served.

Light thought what he did was justified, that Kira's actions were warranted, but that wasn't the case. Then again, if L should fail did that make Light right? Would his justice be the new standard? What was justice anyway? Bad people got away with bad things. Good people got caught up in bad things. Good people got blamed for bad things. Bad people were credited with good things and sometimes things turned out for the better in the long run, despite injustices.

Who decided what was right and what was wrong? Did it even matter?

Those thoughts plagued Haruka. It would have been easier to give in and allow Light to devour her, but she couldn't stand down. It was no longer a matter of right and wrong, it was about winning.

If Light won everyone else would loose.

There would be no freedom to mess up, no real choices in life. It'd become clear to her that he'd moved far beyond trying to rid the world of crime; if that had been the end game he could have won long ago. No, he wasn't just trying to clean up, he was trying to take over.

If Light won he would be God.

/~/~/~/~/

"So, Haruka-chan, you've got a busy week ahead of you! Get some rest, alright? And good job today!"

"Thank you, Okada-san. You as well!"

Oakda, Manami was officially installed as Yagami, Haruka's manager, after extensive meetings that involved the chief of police and his lawyer, on Thursday January 4, 2007. She was an older woman, already in her late thirties, who had nearly fifteen years of experience in the entertainment industry. For a short time she'd been a television host, but her bent had been more in the direction of management than the spotlight and by the time she was twenty-five she'd been overseeing the direction of aspiring child actors. At this point she'd also held the spot of manager for another model, but she'd never worked with a person whose career was as promising as Haruka's.

The girl was seemingly a prodigy and humble on top of that. She made the work look easy, but after all her years in the business Manami knew that wasn't the case for most. It could take a lot of training to gain the abilities Haruka naturally possessed. Not everyone could follow direction well or make the work of the photographers so effortless. The cameras loved her; it was as if she didn't have a so-called bad side and nothing seemed to phase the talent. That day alone there'd been multiple delays when equipment failed and a co-worker, another young model, had a meltdown, yet Haruka sailed through the hours without a hint of temper.

Oakda was unaware that Haruka viewed this time as an escape. Things that would have normally bothered her were taken as blessings. Every delay was another few minutes away from Light, a reprieve from her worries about Kira.

When Fujii, Sakura had a tantrum over something insignificant she watched the display with a bit of envy. How carefree that girl was, how simple minded. What anxieties troubled her? She was an only child, doted on by her parents, who had been modeling since she was an infant. Sakura had been too happy to gloat over her success, unable to comprehend that her light was fading as she told Haruka of the way her mother had walked the runways of Paris and Milan, said that her father was a designer. She didn't realize that her prosperity was due to riding the coat tails of her parents or that it wouldn't last forever.

Sakura provided a hiatus. Instead of thinking of Light and all the people who had died by his hand, however he managed that, she considered the fate of Fujii. Haruka had heard of the label her father designed for, though only because she'd seen the clothing on discount racks. Her mother had clearly invested in face lifts, if not more extensive surgeries, and was barking orders at laymen who rolled their eyes when the woman turned away. Sakura was little more than a source of murmured complaints and gossip.

Fujii, Sakura did not see that her downfall was fast approaching, but her existence supplied a needed distraction for Haruka. As annoying as she would have found the teenager ordinarily, her bloated sense of self-importance served to entertain.

"What I wouldn't give for–"

"For what? Haruka?"

Damn.

"What I wouldn't give for something greasy and calorie-filled," was her contrived answer. He _would_ be right on the other side of the door. "How long were you standing there? Impatient?" A teasing tone, yielding as he quickly kissed her.

"Yes." Another kiss, longer, deeper.

If there was any silver-lining to this dark cloud it was how distractible he'd become. Whatever he'd been doing before she arrived, and it couldn't have been honorable, had been interrupted. She held a power over him, though she hated to exert it.

"Uh, other people are here, right?"

He pulled away with a frown and an annoyed sigh.

She couldn't get rid of the fear that one of these days he was going to do the whole family in just to get her to himself.

"Maybe," she leaned close, whispered in his ear. "We can sneak upstairs..."

He had her back pressed against his bedroom door less than a minute later, his mouth assaulting hers as she hitched a leg up around his waist.

"Light," a breathy sigh and he believed everything she said, fell for the lie all too willingly. "Light," when she moaned, when he carried her to the bed, she could see it in his eyes. This wasn't love, it was obsession. "L-Light!" He touched her, pushed his fingers inside of her, not because he cared about her, but because he wanted to bind her to him. Everything he did was for himself.

"Haruka..." They weren't so different; what she did was for herself, too. She didn't think herself a good person for it because, in all honesty, she wasn't part of the contest for anyone else. "Haruka," hissing her name only meant that _she_ was the one who was really in control. He was the one obsessed. "Ha-Ha-," falling apart when ran her tongue up the shaft and sucked on the end, he was a mess.

If she wanted to be sincere she would admit that they were _both_ a mess, but that led to too many doubts so she tried not to think that way as he rolled to his side, wrapped his arms around her and mouthed her neck.

She tried really hard not to think about her mother downstairs in the kitchen making supper for her fractured family, about her father working to catch a psychopathic murderer who was actually his own son, or about Sayu in her room growing more frustrated by the nanosecond with her arithmetic before she would finally give up and come to Light for help.

She tried _really, really_ hard to believe that L would figure this all out soon, that he would find the evidence that evaded her, convict Light as Kira, put the bastard to death and be her knight in shinning armor because she _really, really_ needed someone to save her.

/~/~/~/~/

He needed a clue. Just one piece of information and Kira would be found.

What was he missing?

He stood at the window, hunched as always with a thumb at his lips, staring out at the city lights. If he'd had the time he might have considered how wasteful society was, how spoiled people were and the arrogance that led them to believe that things would never change, but he didn't.

The task force, a team of five men from the Japanese police, was combing through information provided by the FBI in hopes of finding the hint that would crack the case wide open. Truthfully he doubted they would be the ones to discover it, but one could never be sure. His own estimation put their chances around the ten percent mark.

Not impossible, though unlikely.

Whether they did or not was beside the point. The men needed to feel useful and he _did_ require their assistance, but this busy work was nothing more than a means to an end; he didn't think there was anything left to gain from the FBI data.

They hadn't thought anyone suspicious. There had been no cause to raise alarm about the police or their family members, yet he felt certain that _one of them_ had some knowledge. The police files had been accessed by someone, someone no one would suspect or think to accuse; who else but a member of the uniformed could be afforded such protection?

Kira was not just a run-of-the-mill civilian, of that he was ninety-three percent positive. Perhaps he was not part of the police, but he was surely related and so far above reproach that no one had thought to consider him.

They would need to review the surveillance tapes from December 27, the day the FBI agents died.

/~/~/~/~/

Had he missed anything?

Misora, Naomi was dead and her body would never be found; even if it was there was nothing much to connect himself to the woman. Should he be seen on the CCTV system with her all that could be surmised was that she'd left of her own accord. It would be simple enough to tell most of the truth, leaving out key facts of course, and his reputation was impeccable so he had no doubt that he would be believed.

Misora had almost been his downfall. If she'd managed to tell a member of the Kira investigation of her opinions he would have lost major ground, maybe lost entirely.

But, she hadn't. In fact, he'd found her first. It almost seemed as if a god larger than Himself was on his side.

However, Misora, Naomi was not his only problem. Haruka was becoming an increasingly heavy burden. He was disturbed by how often his twin cropped up in his thoughts, seemingly without explanation, at the most inopportune moments.

"So, Light, how about an apple?"

She was causing him to loose sleep and he'd begun to wonder if it might actually be better for her to leave the house, if for nothing more than his peace of mind. Keeping her close, though he was loath to push her away, would eventually prove detrimental.

He didn't have the time to spend on her now. Later, when he formally took his place as God of the New World, when He was in complete control, he would be able to have her fully.

"Light, an apple?"

And that was where the problem began. He didn't want to wait. It might very well be years before he was able to truly call himself God and how could he stay away from her for _that long_? He was intoxicated by her, almost addicted; certainly she took up more space in his mind than he should have allowed.

Vivid dreams that woke him in the middle of night sent him to her bedroom seeking release.

Mid-day thoughts of her gasps and moans left him on edge.

Random worries that she might be with someone else turned his blood to ice, made him contemplate hiding her away in some secret location.

"Hey, Light!"

Haruka. Where was she now? What was she doing? Was she thinking of him as he thought of her? Did he preoccupy her the way she preoccupied him?

Of course there could be no doubting that. She wanted him just as badly as he wanted her, she'd made that clear. He'd woken to find her straddling his waist the night before, her lips at his ear. Haruka was His.

And yet he felt conflicted. He _should_ kill her, she was a distraction, but if he did that who would he go to for satisfaction? He couldn't imagine finding anyone as appealing as he did her. There was no one who matched him so well and there never would be either. She was his duplicate. Born, not only from the same mother, but conceived at the same moment. Who could be more perfectly suited to himself?

For now he would try and stem the tide of his feelings. He would convince his family that it was best for her to move out, thereby putting distance between them. Without her constant presence he would be able to concentrate on his work with the Death Note, figure out a way to expose L and then return her to his side once he was free of the police harassment.

/~/~/~/~/

Haruka had a terrible nightmare.

There he was, Light, his body riddled with bullets, yet he ran on. An adrenaline rush? It had to be. He should have been dead... And he _was_ dying. Alone in a warehouse, on a metal staircase.

"Light!" She tried to reach for him, tried to call his attention, but he didn't hear her.

As he faded, his eyes growing clouded, she thought she saw something. A huge, dark _thing_ with wings, but it was only for a moment, less than a second, so she couldn't be sure what it was.

A funeral. Light in a casket, her mother crying in anguish and Sayu! In a wheelchair? Where was Dad?

The realization hit like a freight train. Her father was dead too, had been for some time already.

"This isn't happening," she said, but it seemed that no one heard her. "This isn't real!"

She found herself in bed, sitting up with an arm outstretched and breathing heavily. Her heart pounded, her pulse thudding in her ears, as she left he room. She had to know. She had to see.

His door was locked, it took too long for him to open it and for one awful second she thought her dream had been reality, but then he was there, that monstrous smirk on his face until he saw the way she looked.

"Haruka?"

She didn't stop to think, didn't care that he'd done horrible things because in that instant he was her _twin_. He was Yagami, Light, not Kira. Her older brother was there, _alive_.

"I thought you were dead," she gasped, flinging herself forward. "I saw you _dead_." She couldn't stop the tears. " _You_ were dead. _Dad_ was dead. _Sayu was as good as dead._ "

Pure evil. That dream was nothing short of vile, but was it true? She'd never experienced anything like that before. It was so graphic, so realistic. But he was here! Light was alive.

She didn't notice the way he maneuvered her into the room, made her sit on his bed. It wasn't until he put his hands to her face that she realized he knelt in front of her.

"What do you mean?"

He sounded calm, but his eyes told a different story. He looked furious, but this wasn't something she could lie about. She couldn't hide this or pretend it hadn't happened.

"I guess it was... A dream, but– It was _so real_ ," more tears. Her nose was running, she could feel it. "You were shot so many times, but you kept running anyway. You died alone, somewhere, I don't know where! A warehouse. And there was that _thing–"_

"What 'thing'?" he gave her a slight shake when she clammed up. "Haruka. Tell me. What 'thing'?"

She shook her head. "I don't know. I only saw it for, maybe, half a second? It was so weird, so _scary_. It wasn't human! A demon, that's what it looked like. Some kind of black demon with wings. It's skin was so pale, almost blue in the light."

Yes. A demon. That described it well. Something straight out of Hell.

"And then the funeral– Mom was inconsolable and Sayu, I don't even think she knew what was going on. She was just not there at all, her mind was somewhere else! I don't even know if _I_ was there. I could have been dead too. No one seemed to see me–"

/~/~/~/~/

He was trying very hard to contain his emotions.

She'd seen Ryuk.

She'd seen his death.

Haruka was telling him that he was going to die.

"When do you think it was?" An unconcerned tone; he couldn't give away the truth.

She was gaining control of her breathing. "A few years away. Sayu looked a little older."

A few years? That was no time at all.

"Do you know _why_ , why I died?"

Again with her shaking head. So, she was unaware of the reason behind his death, but he could guess. Who would shoot him if not the police? And why would _they_ do that unless they knew he was Kira, unless he failed and L won?

He didn't want to believe it. It was too farfetched to be true, right? Haruka seeing his death, maybe it was just a subconscious fear. But, that didn't explain the 'demon'.

"I told you I wouldn't say anything about your death date, but since your sister brought it up, and it will make things more interesting, I'll tell you something," Ryuk spoke up. "She's right. It's not that far off!" His laughter was sickening. "I don't know any details, even if I did I wouldn't tell you, but a few years is nothing much to you right? HA!"

And there was the conformation.

Haruka was right. She'd seen the day of his death, the day he lost to L. Ryuk would write his name in a Death Note and everything he'd done would be for nothing.

There had to be a way to change it.

/~/~/~/~/

He'd kissed her forehead, told her not to worry and made her stay in his bed for the night. She couldn't stop herself from clinging and when she woke the next morning found herself wrapped securely around him. She wouldn't have been surprised to find that she'd strangled him in the night, but his breathing was steady.

Besides, if that dream was to be believed Light's death would come by gunfire not asphyxiation.

Should I tell him? she wondered. Tell him that I know he's Kira?

That question was easily answered. No. Not yet. If she ever did tell him it would only be because they'd reached an impasse with no other way forward. This wasn't the time.

Still, she felt sure the nightmare would haunt her for years to come. God forbid it _did_ come true. Even now she couldn't get the image out of her mind. Light lying alone, bleeding out in some old, dirty place.

Alone. He was going to die alone.

The thought made her eyes water. As much as she wanted Kira dead, she couldn't say the same for Light. She didn't want that future for him, but neither could she be sure that there was another road to take.

Prior to this her forays into the future had always happened while she was awake, without warning, and never lasted more than a few seconds. This was different. She'd seen so much and it was further ahead than anything she'd ever experienced in the past. Maybe far enough that something could be done to prevent the tragedy.

There could only be one route for Kira and it wasn't pleasant. Kira _would_ be caught and put to death, but did Light have to suffer the same fate? Was there not a way to stop it all?

Once again she questioned why she had to be the one to see such bleak things. If there was nothing she could do then why make her see it at all? She didn't want a future like that. Her father dead, her brother dead, her sister incapacitated and her mother beside herself with grief.

How could her family fall apart that way?

There was only one answer:

Light was Kira.

 **Death Note Facts**

The numbers above a person's head, visible only with the Shinigami Eyes, show their lifespan and indicate the date of a person's death.


	7. Glare

_Chapter 7_

 _Glare_

 _ **A/N: We'll begin deviating from the main plot now! (The mentioned song is 'You're My Number One' by S Club 7)  
**_

Naomi Misora was missing, likely dead. She'd arrived in Japan with her fiancee, Raye Penber, and remained after his death. L thought it far too coincidental for her to have simply vanished of her own accord and, considering his limited experience with the woman, he could not connect her disappearance with the easy answer of suicide. It was too unlike her. If anything she would have tried to find Kira herself; perhaps, to her detriment, she had found her target.

"Everyone, from this point I'd like to focus our investigation on only those people who Raye Penber was tailing. In particular he was assigned to two police officers and those closest to them."

/~/~/~/~/

Haruka arrived home first on January ninth. She'd skipped the returning ceremony, with parental permission, to go to a long photo-shoot.

"Good work today, Haruka!"

"Thank you, Manami-san. Drive carefully," she waved as her manager pulled back onto the street and made to enter the house. "Locked?" She rang the bell to no avail. "No one's home? Lucky," she fished a house key out of her bag, along with an MP3 player, and opened the door singing.

If there was one thing Haruka would _never_ tell anyone of, it was her preference for English pop music. It was the sole reason for her good grades in the foreign language class. At this point she was able to understand the songs she liked and sing along without difficulty, but she knew she was far from truly proficient.

To make matters worse her vocal range was rather limited, but there were just some songs that demanded a sing-a-long.

"What is love, 'cuz baby I don't know, I got a funny feeling in my heart. If this is love, it feels like butterflies, so tell me baby is this how it starts? I know I never felt like this before, you're like a drug you got me wanting more–"

Up the stairs, singing into a pencil.

"You're, you're my number one. I'd do anything for you."

Past Light's door, into her room, pausing in the entry way to dance badly.

"You're, you're my number one. With you I know I belong."

She put her bag by the door, rifled through her dresser and found an outfit.

"Tell me what, what have I gotta do, 'cuz I wanna lay a claim on you. To make you mine, for now and for all time, so tell me baby what I gotta do, yeah–"

It was as she pulled her shirt over her head that she realized her letter was no long in the air duct.

Holy shit, she thought as her voice died. It actually happened.

That meant one of two things. Either Light had noticed and removed it _or,_ the unthinkable, camera's and/or wiretaps had been installed. By L. Well, more likely someone working for him, but even so–

"You're, you're my number one. I'd do anything for you." She couldn't let on that she was aware so as her music played she continued singing while trying to push away feelings of self-consciousness.

Were they watching her?

"You're, you're my number one. With you I know I belong."

Without question.

"There ain't nothing I won't do. I'd walk on water just to be with you, whooo... Baby, baby, you're, you're my number one. I'd do anything for you..."

She was in a bit of a daze. There were very likely cameras and microphones within her bedroom, well hidden no doubt, if not in the rest of the house. That would only make sense. Even if she was the only one under elevated suspicion they would need to watch her every move.

Speaking of 'they', exactly who would be on the other end? Definitely her father; that was a simple enough guess. There were three women in this house and if the task force was being thorough, and was there any point if they weren't?, then even the bathroom would be bugged. It would be considered courtesy to keep as many unfamiliar eyes away from the family as possible.

Well, that was one, but one set of eyes wasn't reliable, especially considering his position as the head of the household.

It was safest to assume that L was another observer. Whether he was or not made no difference, not really, but it was better to expect the worst. His title of World's Best Detective was obviously hard earned, but Haruka thought he must have some innate talent in the area. Plenty of people were ambitious workers, but not everyone could reach the top; natural ability couldn't be overlooked. He was likely especially good with details.

If that was the case then he'd probably detected her hesitation. He may even be aware of what she'd noticed, but it would be wise to continue as if nothing was amiss.

So she dressed, much to her embarrassment fell over once as she attempted to pull on black stockings while holding her music player at the same time, took her photos and then sat at the computer. All told it was nearly twenty minutes later that she left the house again; she had calories to burn and the rest of her family would be back soon.

/~/~/~/~/

L did not avert his eyes for the privacy of the observed, not even when she took a tumble and turned too red in the face for someone who _should_ think they were alone.

He'd noted the pause when her gaze swept over the central air vent, saw her eyes widen; she'd recovered quickly, but he was certain Yagami, Haruka was aware that she was under surveillance. More than that, she'd apparently been expecting it to happen.

 _ **L**_ ,

 _ **If you're reading this letter it means wiretaps have been put in place, likely cameras as well. I'm not surprised by it, but I think you should know that my brother is probably also aware of this. The truth is he's a lot smarter than I am, but I've always been better at looking to the future so I might have been a step ahead of him this time.**_

 _ **It would be best if you don't tell my father what's in this note (I'm assuming you're working together in some capacity).**_

 _ **This is disturbing to me on multiple levels, but let me start by saying I am reasonably confident that Yagami, Light, my older brother and twin, is Kira. I can't tell you how he commits the murders, but I can see changes in him. No one else seems to have noticed, but he's different with me, especially when we're alone (go ahead and take a guess at what that means, World's Greatest Detective-sama).**_

 _ **Maybe it was stupid of me, but I joined in the "game". As of right now he's unaware that I'm playing, he thinks he's leading me on and unless I make a huge mistake he won't realize the truth. He's too full of himself to imagine that I might be the one playing him.**_

 _ **You already know that he has access to confidential police data, that he's incredibly intelligent and that he seems perfect, but please believe me when I say that he is FAR from it. Though, I'm sure that in his mind he's perfection incarnate.**_

 _ **Maybe something has happened between now (for me) and now (for you), maybe everything is different and the case is closed, but I doubt it.**_

 _ **So, that's all I guess. I'm sorry I don't have anything but personal experience to give you, I'm trying to find out more, but he's very guarded and I don't think he wants anyone, not even me, to know the truth.**_

Her letter to himself had been found by those installing the equipment. It appeared to be several weeks old, judging by the slightly musty smell and damp feel of the paper. She'd used a thick envelope, but it hadn't been quite enough to fully protect its contents from the elements.

She'd incriminated Yagami, Light as Kira, though without hard evidence to support her assertion. She had insinuated an inappropriate relationship between the boy and herself and claimed that her brother would also be aware of the surveillance.

He was considering the things she'd written as she remained within view of the cameras; she was taking pictures of herself in a mirror on the back of her bedroom door, using her computer to make slight modifications and then uploading them to her website.

Of course he was aware of Yagami, Haruka's profession, he'd done extensive research on the families of the policemen within his task force. This one in particular was a student who'd lately joined a small talent agency by the name of Float and it seemed her abilities were well suited to the occupation.

She was easily the most conventionally interesting of those under suspicion, but not the highest on his list of suspects.

Yagami, Light held the number one position. As Yagami-san had said in her note he seemed perfect, too perfect. Regardless his guilt was not a given, L gave the teen a five percent chance of being Kira, and yet he got the _feeling_...

Unfortunately feelings were generally unreliable and even if they were correct could hardly be used to convict the upstanding, genius son of a well-respected policeman of being Kira.

Yagami, Haruka took second place. Her chances were less than one percent, but still higher than those of anyone else involved.

"I didn't know she went out of the house dressed _that_ way," Soichiro spoke quietly, almost to himself, a frown on his face.

L was no respecter of whispers. "It is popular fashion. I assume she feels the need to dress to trends." Also, in his opinion, her outfit was nothing outrageous; then again he was not her father and he wouldn't pretend to understand the emotions that went along with that position. It would be a fruitless waste of time.

/~/~/~/~/

Yagami, Light paused briefly outside his bedroom door. His moment of inactivity was even shorter than his sister's had been, but still noticeable.

His father took issue with the piece of paper used to indicate whether or not others had entered his room uninvited.

"For a seventeen year old kid I wouldn't say this kind of behavior is particularly abnormal. When I was his age I did strange things too."

He also left the house not long after entering and by that time Haruka had been gone near ten minutes, but L's interest was piqued when Light took off running, leaving the front door wide open.

Faint, very faint, but there had definitely been a loud sound in the area.

"Watari, send squad cars to the area of the Yagami household immediately."

/~/~/~/~/

Was this man going to kill her?

Had Light finally realized what she was doing and put her on his hit list?

She'd been on her way back home, passing an alleyway, when a hand reached out from the darkness and placed itself over her mouth. She'd fought back instantly, yet it seemed that the things she'd learned in the self-defense training Soichiro had insisted she and her siblings participate in were lost to her now. In the heat of the moment, faced with an assault on her person, her movements were sluggish. This man wasn't exactly strong, but he was bigger than her and determined to get what he wanted.

Apparently that wasn't her purse because she'd dropped it and he didn't seem interested.

A bite to the grubby palm gave her a two second, ear piercing scream, and yet it seemed that no one would come. Surely they couldn't be the only people out? There had been plenty of bystanders near the store, had she not yelled loudly enough?

Perhaps there was train going by. Maybe her call had been drowned out. That seemed likely.

Am I afraid? she wondered as she struggled.

Only in the abstract. To fight was her instinct and she was close to home. If she could get away she'd soon be in the vicinity of neighbors who would call the police for her.

And that was when Light rounded the corner, grabbed the man holding his sister and slammed his head against a brick wall.

/~/~/~/~/

The police arrived mere seconds after Light to find Haruka exhibiting symptoms of shock, her attacker unconscious and the son of the Detective Superintendent on the verge of killing the assailant.

"Yagami, Light!" One of them called for his attention as others pulled at the boy from behind. "The police are here now! You can stop!"

"That scum!" he shouted. "That fucking scum!"

It took Light several minutes to calm, to shake his homicidal rage and act more concerned for Haruka than he actually felt so he could convince the attending personnel that his murderous anger had passed.

A pair of ambulances arrived shortly thereafter and both the siblings and criminal were transported to the closest hospital. Light insisted on staying with his sister.

/~/~/~/~/

Haruka was unconscious and he couldn't convince Ryuk to tell him the name of the offender.

"Don't worry about it, he'll be dead soon anyway!" The shinigami frowned. "Oops. Didn't mean to tell you that."

Soichiro arrived not long after Ryuk's slip to find his son pacing the hall in front of Haruka's assigned room.

"What happened?"

His father got the full story, the truth as Light saw no benefit in lying. He'd been leaving the house to go to the convenience store when he heard Haruka's shriek, ran in the direction it'd come from and found her contending with the criminal. The moments after that were blurred, but he surmised that he'd managed to beat the man within an inch of his life.

"You did the right thing."

So his father said, but if he could have gone back and done it over _he would have_.

Not that he wanted Haruka in danger, but loosing control was unacceptable. Then again, he wondered if he had any chance of keeping his cool in a situation like that.

The trash had put his hands on her, made her literally scream for help and as the first one on the scene he'd been obligated to step in. He knew that even if the man did die he probably wouldn't be charged, but there was still a chance. He couldn't take chances.

It was too late now and regret was worthless. All he could do was plan how to respond should this go to court.

/~/~/~/~/

Several hours later the Yagami men were informed that Haruka had not suffered major injury, though she had several cuts and bruises and remained unconscious.

Her attacker was a run-of-the-mill druggie. Blood work showed that he was on some kind of hallucinogen and when he died at two fifty-seven that afternoon his death was attributed to an adverse reaction to the drug he'd injected about an hour before the crime.

Light was not required to go to the police station as he'd already given a statement.

/~/~/~/~/

It was in the wee hours of the morning that Haruka awoke to find herself in a strange, dark room.

An IV drip, a heart monitor... Ah. She was in the hospital, but she'd never been in a room like this one before. It didn't seem like the usual, sterile medical building. That wasn't to say she'd spent much time within hospitals, but she'd visited friends and she remembered, vaguely, seeing her mother after Sayu's birth. Those rooms had seemed colder, impersonal. Often the space wasn't even private, shared between multiple patients.

She was the only one in this room.

"Gah!" Or not. "Who the hell are you?!"

Large dark eyes, black rings beneath said eyes, a mass of black unkempt hair, and he was sitting in such a strange position. Knees pulled to his chest and no shoes? Who _was_ he?

Was it possible that she was being visited by a spirit? The pale skin of this man almost glowed in the low-light, supplied only by a gap in the curtains covering a window. Could he be the previous occupant of this room?

She shot that worry down as stupid; he _couldn't_ be a ghost.

Haruka tried to sit up, hissed in pain, and fell back against the bed.

"You're likely very sore. They've got you on pain killers, but perhaps the dosage needs to be increased. Avoid unnecessary movement."

Bossy. Stranger. Odd. Left alone with her.

Leap of logic.

"...L?"

His eyes flicked to hers. "Interesting," his thumb moved to his mouth. "Yagami-san, why do you suspect me of being L?"

"Uh, honestly? I don't have a good answer. But, my dad wouldn't let anyone he didn't know in here with me, especially not alone, _especially_ after what happened and I doubt he's far away. I don't know you and, no offense, but you're a strange one. Don't they say geniuses are kind of...Off?" She paused. "Also, I can't think of anyone else who would be here to question me except a member of the Kira investigation, but I think I've at least seen everyone who could be on that team. Everyone except L."

Her logic was noticeably flawed and there were obvious holes in her theory, yet she seemed confident in her statements.

"I don't know why he attacked me," she said.

She was also impatient; she'd not waited for him to reply.

"I was just walking back home when he pulled me into the alley. I hoped to fight him off, but I don't remember much. I know I tried to call for help, but–"

"Your brother heard you."

"Light did?"

Stunned.

"Hm, yes. When the police arrived, not long after he did, they found him pummeling the suspect. It took three men to pull him away. It's not surprising that you don't remember the rest of the incident. You'd gone into shock by that point."

 _Light_ had taken the man down? He was right. She didn't remember that at all.

"He's since been persuaded to return to your home, but he was here for several hours. He gave his statement to the officers and he's in the clear as far as charges are concerned. Though the suspect has died–"

"He's _dead_?"

"–the death has been connected to his drug use. He was likely hallucinating when he attacked you."

"Tch." Talking over her. Ignoring her. Not answering her question. She changed track. "Why are you sitting in the dark?"

"Because the light may have woken you sooner than you should have."

"Why am I in this room?"

"Because I should not be seen by the general public."

"So, you had me put here? Where _is_ here anyway?"

"A private hospital not far from the one you were taken to originally."

"Are you L or not?"

"Does it matter?"

"Only a little." If he _was_ L then all her romantic notions were dashed. It was a bit disheartening. Some knight in shining armor this guy would be.

"Only a little," he considered her answer. "Yet it does matter to you."

His inflection did not denote a question, but she replied anyway. "Like I said, only a little."

"Why?"

She didn't answer.

"You've shown no tendency toward timidity, yet this question you won't answer. I can only think that your reasoning brings you some measure of shame."

"It's not _shame_ ," she defended hotly. "And I don't really care if you know or not, but if you _are_ L you can figure it out yourself."

He was silent for a time, something like thirty seconds, and then, "Ah. You had a misguided notion of L."

She looked away and pressed her lips together.

"What did you think L would be like?"

"Not like _you_."

She was trying to insult him.

"In my experience most people seem to see the character of L as a middle-aged man. Did you have romantic inclinations toward that kind of figure?"

" _NO_!" He was insulting her!

The shout called the attention of her father, who was just outside the door, and he strode into the room, momentarily blinding both occupants as he turned on the light.

"Haruka," he moved to her side. "How do you feel?"

"Fine, fine! I'm fine! Perfect! I wasn't attacked by a drug addict, brought to a strange place and left alone with someone _even stranger_ or anything!"

L detected the relief on Soichiro's face. This attitude of his daughter's was normal.

"Haruka, this man is called Ryuzaki. He's the head of the Kira investigation."

Disbelieving eyes and a sarcastic tone. "Oh really? _Ryuzaki_? Are you sure this isn't the world famous L because _I'm_ pretty sure–"

"She is in a defensive mood, Chief Yagami. Perhaps I should have been more gentle when speaking of her ill-conceived sensitivity for myself."

Her jaw dropped. For a moment all was still, but suddenly, and completely without warning, Haruka was yanking the tubes out of her arm, standing on the bed and throwing everything she could get her hands on at the offender.

"GET OUT! GET. OUT! You, you stupid, nasty, idiotic, rude piece of sh–!"

"Haruka!"

L was slightly surprised, though not terribly concerned and in no hurry until she pulled the telephone off the bedside table and made to throw it as well.

He dodged the projectile, but just barely.

/~/~/~/~/

"Watari, have the arrangements all been made?"

"Yes, Ryuzaki. Everything is complete."

"And her father made no argument?"

"He seemed relieved."

As he'd predicted.

"Ah, Watari, please be sure to remove any objects with the potential to be used as weapons from her room."

"Of course, Ryuzaki."

/~/~/~/~/

"I'm going where?"

After the overnight stay and a battery of tests that concluded in the late afternoon she was being discharged.

"Haruka, you must understand the gravity of the situation."

"Oh yeah, I get it, but that has nothing to do with this."

"As a matter of fact it does _,_ " he was against telling her, but Ryuzaki had given the go-ahead in case of defiance. "I know you won't want to accept this, but, well, the truth is you're under suspicion of being Kira."

"For Pete's sake!"

"Now listen to me," he took on an authoritative timbre. "Ryuzaki would not have suggested this if he didn't think it necessary. The best way to clear yourself is to go along with the situation. There won't be any real disruption in your life. You'll go to school, to work, as usual. The only thing changing is–"

"Where I'm living!"

"You wanted to move out anyway, right?"

"This is _not_ the same thing."

Of course her father wouldn't have had any objections to this; he was probably glad for the extra set of eyes. She couldn't blame him _,_ he was justifiably concerned, but _L_ was another matter.

"That bastard."

"Haruka! Tone down the language."

She was suspected of being Kira? Alright, that was plausible, but Light was most certainly the number one suspect. However, thanks to recent events, she was much easier to manipulate than her brother. On top of that L likely believed that she wanted to get away from Light and, if he did, he was right.

"Dammit."

"Haruka," the older man spoke with warning. He was growing tired of her opposition; it wasn't unexpected, but his patience was shot. "Your things have already been moved–"

"In a day?!"

"YES, in a day."

" _All_ my things?!"

"All of your clothes. Sayu packed for you."

"I thought you were against my leaving home. Seems like that was disingenuous."

"I'll be seeing far more of you now than I have in the last few weeks if that's what you mean." He sighed as he started the car. "Every few days you'll be switching hotels. They operate as the de-facto headquarters for the case and for now Ryuzaki doesn't think it safe to remain in one place for too long. That may change, he's said as much, but–"

"So, I'll have to live out of my suitcases until Detective-sama decides he can sit still? And what about my camera, my computer?"

"Your camera is with your things, but the computer will stay behind."

"I need it!"

"Ryuzaki is providing you with a laptop."

"Creep."

"Haruka, stop with the insults. Accept the situation and make the best of it."

That was the end of the discussion. Though she tried to spark another argument her father was having none of it. It seemed he was serious.

"But, _D_ _addy."_

"No."

This was unthinkable! Haruka truly could not remember the last time she hadn't gotten her way. Minimal effort was usually expanded, whining hadn't been employed in years, and yet she'd failed to change his mind.

They walked through an opulent lobby and into an elevator that only opened with the use of a key card. She made a face at the camera.

" _Haruka_."

The place had at least a four-star rating. A fountain in the foyer, a fireplace and sitting areas. The floors were polished marble. She'd caught a look at the restaurant and bar; women wore fancy dresses, the men were in suits.

Up to the thirtieth floor they went, near the top of the building. She followed her father out of the lift and into the middle of a hallway. There were only four doors here, two on either side of the corridor.

"This," he led her down the hall, to the furthest door on the left. "Is the suit. Actually, Ryuzaki has the whole floor, but that's just a precaution."

Of course he rented out the whole place, she thought sourly. Why not be rich too?

The door opened before he knocked.

"Ah, Matsui."

"Welcome back, chief! And Haruka-chan! Oh, it's been a while so you probably don't remember–"

"Matsui-san! Hello, it _has_ been a while hasn't it?" She'd been briefed by her father on the use of code names and as she swept into the room her eyes landed on 'Ryuzaki'. He would be difficult to miss, but she did not address him; she bowed to each member in turn, purposely ignoring the detective.

They murmured greetings, slightly concerned by the lack of acknowledgment extended to one, obvious, member.

Matsuda remained blissfully oblivious. "It really has been awhile," he spoke earnestly. "Wow, you've grown up so much!"

"Ah," she brought her hands to her cheeks. "That's embarrassing!"

She was an actress, a flirt and inclined to holding onto resentment.

Ryuzaki watched the exchange with a small measure of interest, however it was not enough to put other things on hold.

"Haruka-san." She glared at him. "Asahi-san."

"-sama," she demanded.

"Asahi- _san_."

She huffed, crossed her arms and turned her head toward the door with her nose in the air.

The chief heaved a sigh as he put a hand on Matsuda's shoulder and pushed him away from the child. She may have looked like an adult, but she was still prone to bouts of immaturity. He took it as a sign of her comfort level; she felt safe to act out and he was grateful for that, but he would be lying if he said he wasn't tired of it.

"Asahi-san, you have been installed in the room at the end of that," he pointed, "hallway. The last door on the right. Go."

" _You_ can't just tell _me_ –"

"Haruka!"

/~/~/~/~/

Light was furious. He'd been the concerned older brother in front of the family at the latest dinning room table meeting, acted glad to hear that Haruka would be watched over by one of the task force, but nothing could have been further from the truth.

She'd been stolen from him, he would have to get her back and unless he was very much mistaken she'd been taken in by L. Who else could get their father to do something like this?

Haruka would not be so accepting of these events, but if their father was serious, if _L_ was serious, there would be little she could do except throw tantrums.

"Dammit!" His fist hit the desk.

/~/~/~/~/

He was a freak. He was _such_ a _freak_.

But, she didn't hate him.

"Pfft," she blew a piece of hair out of her face. No, she didn't hate him, but she didn't like him either.

She really didn't know what she'd expected 'L' to be like. She hadn't taken the time to think of it. Why did that matter? She'd only admired his skill in his profession, his ability to take the top spot, and _maybe_ that had grown into a tiny crush, but that was over.

 _So over._

Ryuzaki was no knight in shining armor. He was rude. Bossy. Strange. The man didn't wear socks or shoes!

She slumped into a chair and took stock of her new bedroom. It was far too big. Clearly it was meant for more than one person with the oversized bed, reading area and breakfast table.

"Hmm. A laptop, huh?" She opened the new piece of equipment to familiarize herself with the controls. "I bet it's bugged."

"Excellent deduction."

That was _his_ voice. He'd heard her, was probably looking at her right that moment and using the computer's system to communicate with her.

Enraged she stood, picked up the computer and flung it, with all of her strength and a screech of anger, at the wall.

/~/~/~/~/

The screen went blank.

"Detective Asahi."

"Yes, Ryuzaki?"

"It seems she's broken the laptop."

A defeated sigh. "I'm sorry, Ryuzaki."

"No, no," he waved away the apology. "It was to be expected."

 **Other Facts**

The numbers indicting lifespan at birth may abruptly change, showing a shortened lifetime, but will never naturally show a longer one.

 _ **A/N: Yo. So, seven chapters in... What do you think so far? Unrelated question: What's your personality type?  
**_


	8. Encounter

_Chapter 8_

 _Encounter_

 _ **A/N: No more following the plot of the series! Well, a little, but not much. In the anime, and in the manga, there's a big time skip from January to April. That's not happening here.**_

Her friends spent the day fretting over her, others offered to carry things and take on her duties. It seemed her ordeal had made the local news. Light was hailed a hero; though he hadn't been named in the paper it was soon common knowledge that _he'd_ been his sister's savior.

The hug he gave her, in full view of everyone who'd crowded to look out the windows to watch the two during lunch when he _insisted_ on taking her to the courtyard, had been unexpected and unwelcome. It took all her strength to keep from shoving him away.

It was all for show. Everything he did had an ulterior motive, even this. A public statement of how _close_ they were, of how much he _cared_ about her.

"Where are you staying?" he'd asked, as he patted her head.

"I've been sworn to secrecy." It was the truth. "Actually, I wouldn't be surprised if something on me was wired so I really can't tell you."

His eyes flashed. "Dad said you were staying with a member of the task force. That's true?"

"Yeah, that's right." She would have to give him something, to completely block him out was to call for his wrath. " _Someone_ from the task force."

" _Someone_?"

" _Someone_."

"Hmm." It seemed he understood. "Well, as long as you're safe..."

Right. _Safe_. Kira could kill her for this, but he probably wanted to get closer to L. She was being used on all fronts; there was a way to make this work in her favor, she just had to find it.

/~/~/~/~/

Haruka returned to the hotel around eight. Oakda had tried to convince her to take some time off, but she'd refused. Even though she knew her co-workers would have understood, that it was expected, Haruka was convinced that kind of vacation would make her seem weak. By going to work despite the attack she proved her dedication and professionalism. This was a chance to cement herself in their minds, to make them forever think better of her than those who came later.

"To be standing in front of the camera, just a day after being assaulted and hospitalized..."

"I know! Haruka-chan is really incredible!"

"I can't think of any newer models who would do that and only a few of the really great ones in the past."

"There was that one woman, she was in an accident but went right back to work anyway! She's still really popular even though that was years ago. I saw her on a commercial earlier today."

"I guess this is the kind of thing that separates the A-list from the B-list, huh?"

An A-lister? No. She was aiming higher than that, but it would do for now.

They were speaking right outside the dressing room; did they not realize she was within? Whatever the case it was gratifying to hear that their thoughts followed a predictable pattern, the one she'd been counting on.

In the elevator now she prepared for another encounter with Ryuzaki. She hadn't seen him before leaving that morning, but he would undoubtedly be with the others when she returned.

She didn't have time to waste on anger. It was better to ignore him entirely and go on with her day as if he didn't exist at all.

Upon entering the suit she was greeted with quiet. The cell phones and other electronic devices of the task force members were resting on a table in the entry way so they were there, but not in the open.

"They are reviewing surveillance footage, Asahi-san."

She drew a sharp breath. Watari. She'd been introduced to the older man the night before, after rendering the laptop inoperable. It seemed he was a master of silence. She'd not heard his approach.

"Good to know, I think." She was unsure of how to address him, but he didn't seem to find her informal speech offensive.

"Is there anything I can get you for, Asahi-san?"

"What? Oh, no thank you. I'll just go," she frowned. "To my room." An eye twitched. "Tch," she couldn't help the sound of annoyance.

Haruka failed to notice the smile on the gentleman's face as she disappeared from view. It had been a long while since he'd dealt directly with a teenager, even longer since he had regular contact with a young lady. If nothing else this would be an interesting turn of events and a reprieve from the daily hassles that came with working under L.

That wasn't a complaint on his part, he thought of the boy as something like a son, but L was very set in his ways. It could do him no harm to contend with another strong willed person face-to-face. Perhaps he would learn something.

If there was one thing Watari might complain about in relation to his employer, it was his ego. However, he would never argue that it wasn't warranted. Young as he was L had risen to hold the positions of first, second, and third ranked detectives the world over. There were few who could stand up to him with any kind of confidence, even if they didn't know who he was. He exuded authority; odd as his habits were he'd never had trouble exerting influence when necessary.

He was very much a liar, willing to skirt the law to find the end of a case and had few scruples about using others to do his dirty work.

Still, Watari did not think him 'evil'. No, L was on the side of the just. However whether he thought Haruka just or not was still up to speculation. As yet he'd not said much on the topic of his observations, but it would be foolish to equate his lack of communication with a lack of attention to the subject.

Yes, he likely thought of her as a subject. Something to be watched and understood. L had very little experience with the general populace, his people skills were atrocious, and even less experience with women. Had he ever found them provocative he would have poured time and resources into studying the fairer sex, but he'd never had the inclination. Now, with one right under his nose, he would be obligated to study or risk loosing the chance forever.

For now it seemed the Kira case was growing cold. Surveillance had turned up a few interesting moments, but nothing that pointed to Kira's identity. This wouldn't end in a stalemate, but it might be beneficial to take a step back from the board.

It would be good for him to acquire the ability to handle direct passive aggressive behavior and it appeared that Yagami, Haruka was an expert in that field. L had yet to face this sort of test and Watari wondered how long his incredible patience would hold. It wasn't often that he faced one as stubborn as himself, in fact Watari wasn't sure it had ever happened.

They were due for a comprehensive one-on-one interview, but Haruka-san's schedule made it difficult to pin her down. She'd provided, with some coercion, her plans for the next couple weeks and had been persuaded to add a few days of down time to her agenda. Until then her days were full.

If nothing else the girl was a hard worker, at least in the areas she found interesting. She'd chosen her vocation and was totally dedicated to advancement. Watari had long ago pursued her school records, found that her best subject was English and at the time wondered why she did so well with the difficult language; now he understood. She liked English music and put in the effort to understand it. Arithmetic was not looked on fondly, so she only did well enough. The things she thought important were treated with care, the rest were purposely tossed to the wayside.

In that respect she was much like L.

/~/~/~/~/

Haruka would not have been gratified to find that Watari saw similarities between herself and the detective. As yet she was unable to look beyond her upset, she was trying, but it was proving difficult. She recognized this as a potential learning experience, he _was_ the greatest detective in the world, but–

"... _ill-conceived sensitivity_..."

That jerk! How could he say it like that? And to her father of all people! Why not just announce that some under-aged girl had a crush on a guy she knew almost nothing about from the rooftop?

It wasn't like it had been a big deal. Okay, so she'd liked him, but how weird did he have to be about it? Wasn't that cause for self-satisfaction or something? That would have been a normal reaction, she could have at least understood that, but _no_ , he took her stupid feelings and crushed them. Hadn't she already made it clear that he was _not_ the object of those so-called 'ill-conceived' emotions? She'd basically insulted him to his face before he said any of that!

It was the idea of L that she liked, not the specifics, and now she knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that L was not the kind of person she should harbor sentimental feelings for. He wouldn't understand them even if she did.

It seemed to her that Ryuzaki had probably never had any education in romance, far less than even she did. Her recent experiences were hardly healthy, but at least she could recognize genuine feelings when she saw them _and_ be appropriately sensitive.

She'd been confessed to before, more than once, but she'd never been mean about it.

Maybe labeling what he'd done 'mean' wasn't fair. The insensitivity came from ignorance; then again, he seemed like the type of person to speak so bluntly that he might have said the same things even if he'd been aware of the social niceties involved.

If that was the case then he was just rude. If that wasn't the problem, if he really was wholly unaware, then he was nescient. In either case it was an indictment against him.

He was either clueless or bad-mannered.

Possibly both.

"Hmph."

She'd finished uploading a few pictures from that day's shoot, to make up for her lack of posting the day before and to help transition her followers to a new format. She was tired of taking daily photos of outfits no one would really see her in. Instead, she would slow down. The site was reaching a tipping point; were these people devoted enough to remain through the changes or would they fall off the wagon?

It was a test that needed to be given; she had to know how well she was really doing. There were many daily visitors to her site, but how faithful were they?

There had been a surge in hits because of the attack and she'd addressed it briefly, but it was difficult to say whether or not those people would stick around. The loyal, and there seemed to be a lot of them, had offered praise and words of comfort.

 _ **Thanks to all of your support I've gotten so much work that everything is really hectic now! I'm afraid I won't have time for all my Daily Look posts, but instead of that I thought I'd put up pictures from work! How does that sound to you? Would you like to see 'behind the scenes' things? I hope so because that's whats coming! It's getting hard to put up the pictures of all my meals, so I'll be regulating that a one day a week showcase. Don't worry, I'm not going away and we can still talk in the comments here! Also, I'm sure some of you have heard about what happened the other day, you can follow this link to read the specifics, but just know that I'm fine. I love you all sooo**_ ** _much~!~ –Haruka-chan_**

It was gag worthy, but they ate that kind of stuff up. Already comments of support were flowing in. There were a few naysayers who predicted her downfall, said she was backing off because the pressure was too great, but they paled in comparison to the passionate replies of those who took her words to heart.

 _ **-Did you not see what she went through!? And she's still posting just a day later! Who do you think you are? Does anyone know you? No? Okay then. ttyl or better yet not.**_

 _ **-Jealously is ugly, you should get off at the station. c'ya (Some people wear green all day long!)**_

 _ **-Ignore those kinds of comments, Haruka-chan! Real supporters are here!**_

 _ **-If you have something against her then why are you here at all? All you do is bring traffic to her site! Great job supporting someone you claim to hate. Guess no one ever accused you of being smart o.O**_

"Good." That was the way it should be. She'd never done anything to make them think she didn't appreciate their assistance and this only proved their allegiance.

She didn't need to worry about Ryuzaki or his lack of emotional intelligence. What was he to her? All he was good for was catching Kira, if he could even do that. Right now it seemed like they were about to hit a dead end.

Light wasn't foolish enough to mess up in the face of increased scrutiny and with no new evidence the surveillance would be pulled. She could think of nothing L could do to force her brother to prove himself, but she quickly pushed the thought aside. That wasn't for her to figure out.

 _He_ was the detective.

/~/~/~/~/

Yagami, Light was his number one suspect, but he had nothing on the boy except a gut feeling and his sister's accusations. Neither would stand up in court.

He had a plan, but it would have to wait. Implementation would come at a specific point, but until then he needed to occupy the task force.

"Continue collecting data on criminals, watch the patterns very carefully. If anything changes we need to be immediately aware. I do have a plan of action, but this isn't the right time to begin. For now we act helpless, let Kira think he's on the edge of winning. When the rug is pulled out from beneath him he won't be able to help getting angry. He may retaliate while in a heightened emotional state and that could expose him. Mistakes are made when acting in anger."

Speaking of anger, Haruka seemed to be getting over hers. She'd moved past glaring at him every chance she got to ignoring him completely.

Childish.

On the other hand so was he, so that wasn't much of an insult. If anything it was an indictment against himself. She was younger than he, still a minor until the end of February; her actions could be more easily excused and, as Watari had so _helpfully_ pointed out, she was female.

If he'd been one to roll his eyes he would have done it at that moment. Her gender was no excuse. She was too sensitive, too bratty and too pretty for her own good.

He didn't use the term in a complimentary way. Her good looks had done nothing for her personality. She was used to having her way and almost incapable of accepting defeat; certainly she didn't do so with grace.

"She is young, Ryuzaki," Watari came to her defense. "You are right about her bad habits, but can you blame her for them?"

It wasn't that he blamed her, if anything it was the fault of her parents, but she did grate on his nerves more severely than anything had in a long while. The little terror was good at putting on a nice face for people she needed things from, but he was not held in high estimation, neither was there anything she wanted out of him, so he received nothing but attitude.

All of that was well hidden from the public. He'd placed undercover agents in her path before and they had nothing bad to say about her. Covert interrogations of those she worked with, people at her school, brought up no dirty secrets. If she had one it was the illicit relationship with her brother and she'd told him of that on her own.

Haruka wasn't a problem that needed solving, but she was most definitely a thorn in his side. The easiest way to deal with a thorn was to pluck it out and flick it away, but that would not fix the issues she presented. She was his closest link to Light and to send her off would leave him forever wondering what it was about her that aggravated him so thoroughly.

What he needed to do was dissect her behaviors one by one and then end the ones that bothered him the most. However, he had no idea how to do that. Even if he could pinpoint which actions _exactly_ were causing his irritation, how could he put a stop to them? Playing nice wouldn't do it. She would mock him for it.

" _You think pretending to be_ _pleasant_ _will get you anywhere? HA!"_ or _"So, you like me now? That's too bad because I don't like_ _ **you**_ _."_

Yes that was precisely what she would say.

Returning her discourtesy in kind would only escalate the situation.

" _You can't talk to me like that!"_ and _"Who do you think you are!?"_ as various objects were sent flying past his head.

Her father admonished her for the behavior she displayed, but it was clear she didn't take him seriously and he'd never really threatened the girl with any type of punishment. L thought it obvious that she'd never faced serious correction in her life.

From what he understood the pregnancy she'd come along with had been thought to hold only a single infant, the boy. Her arrival was a surprise. A gift was the likely way her parents thought of her, something special, and they would have treated her as such. A pretty child with pretty manners when it suited her; there wouldn't have been many times in her life when it didn't, which would explain why no one interviewed had ever experienced this side of her personality.

She was well aware of how to act properly. She was choosing not to.

Matsuda, unenlightened as he was, had confronted Haruka on her the difference in treatment and for a moment L had felt sure that the man was about be on the receiving end of her ire, but the clouds passed as quickly as they arrived. It seemed she thought his question innocent and answered truthfully.

"He insulted me."

He knew what she meant, as did her father who passed a hand over his face, but though he'd spent far too much time thinking of it he _could not_ understand where her difficulty lied.

That wasn't an insult! It was a statement of fact! Had her father not deserved to know why she was in such a foul mood? Why had that triggered aggression?

She'd been through a trying moment, he could forgive that lapse in judgment, but it had been a week and she still clung to her grudge with a vice grip.

His hands tightened imperceptibly on his knees as he murmured, "She is so irritating."

The words drew Watari's attention, but he refrained from speaking. There was nothing he could tell L that would remedy the situation and it was rather entertaining to watch him struggle. Ryuzaki had a good grasp of human nature, but his knowledge was general. Now, faced with a specific person harboring specific feelings for a specific purpose, he had trouble understanding motivations. This wasn't a case to solve, there was no definite conclusion to reach. Haruka had done nothing wrong, not really, and Watari suspected it was L's own ignorance that led her to scorn him.

He was still unsure of what had transpired during that first meeting, but it had been intimated that L spoke of something she took offense to and Watari had no trouble believing that. Still, he wanted to know the truth.

Ryuzaki offered no objections as he left the room and Haruka was not adverse to speaking to him when he requested her company. The task force had disbanded for the night, there was little to discuss at the moment, so he sat with her in the main living space.

Tea was offered and accepted.

"So, Asahi-san, I must admit to being curious as to what he did." He did not feel the need to preface his questioning.

"Did he put you up to this?" she asked, defensive.

"No, he did not."

He waited in silence as she considered whether or not she believed him.

"He said I had an 'ill-conceived sensitivity' _to my fathe_ _r._ " Watari coughed, nearly spilled his drink and failed to recover before she noticed his mistake. "I don't care what he calls it, but why did he say it to my dad!? Who does that?!" She shook her head in disgust. "Is he really that stupid or does he just not care?"

"Asahi-san, it isn't that he doesn't care," probably, "and I don't think stupidity is the proper term either, but he does have a slight... deficiency," Ryuzaki wouldn't appreciate that word, "when it comes to understanding how others feel. Especially if it isn't work related."

"That's no excuse! How could he say that and then be confused by my righteous indignation?" She ground her teeth. "I never liked _him._ I liked L!" She paused, seemed surprised by her admission and quickly added, "And it was only a little!"

"Asahi-san, don't you think it's time to explain this to Ryuzaki? He will never know if you don't tell him."

She'd crossed her arms and was shaking her head before he finished speaking. "No way."

/~/~/~/~/

This had gone on long enough. "Ryuzaki."

"Yes, Watari?"

"I have been informed by Haruka-san that you told her father she had formed an 'ill-conceived sensitivity' toward yourself."

He blinked, expression blank as ever. "I did."

" _L_!"

That caught him off guard. Watari had an immeasurable amount of forbearance and it was very rare that the supply was drained. Regardless he failed to understand his meaning so he said nothing.

When his long-time caretaker heaved a sigh and refrained from continuing for several minutes he spoke again. "I do not see where you mean to bring this train of thought, Watari."

"It was not what you said that upset her so much as it was to whom you said it."

A light bulb.

"Ah."

He understood.

/~/~/~/~/

Or so he thought, but his apology was not well received.

"You can't just apologize!" She brought her hands up, held them out in front of herself as she shook. " _You_ told my _father_ that I had _stupid crush_ on you! Who do you think you are?! Why would you do that!?" She stamped her foot. "In what universe does that seem like a good idea?! GET OUT!"

He had the sense to leave the area before she started flinging things.

/~/~/~/~/

" _I may have made a mistake."_

He thought that was an apology?

" _It might have been insensitive of me."_

 _MIGHT_ have been insensitive?!

"OH MY GOD!"

She couldn't stand him. He was an idiot. An absolute idiot!

The second laptop hit the wall outside her bedroom door.

/~/~/~/~/

"Hey, does Haruka-chan seem kind of tense to you?"

"Oh my gosh yes! Not like it's affecting her work or anything, but like something unpleasant happened."

"Do you think someone might have said something rude to her?"

"Maybe. There's always going to be that jealous type. It might have been a shock to her. She's so nice, she might not expect someone to be mean!"

Much to her secret displeasure Haruka received pep-talks from more than one person on the set that afternoon.

/~/~/~/~/

"Wow," Matsuda spoke up once Haruka had stalked through the room. "Did you do something to her, Ryuzaki?" His question was met with sighs and shaking heads. "What?"

/~/~/~/~/

Light was entirely oblivious to Haruka's trials. He had his own life to worry about. Not only was he sexually frustrated, plagued by dreams of his sister and then left wanting, but _her_ dream, of his death, troubled him.

Shot in a warehouse. Dying alone.

He didn't want to believe what she'd said, tried to convince himself that she was simply paranoid, but it was too coincidental. The path he was on might be leading to that kind of ending.

Ryuk was worthless. He had no idea what it might mean or if things like this happened on a regular basis in the human world. He'd never heard of anyone knowing the future in the Shinigami Realm or of any way to circumvent some predicted route.

Knowing about it didn't set it in stone. That one time, just the once, she'd successfully changed an outcome; this could be repaired as well. He would not die alone, he would not loose to L.

Haruka would come back to him and he would rule the New World as God.

 **Other Facts**

A human may hasten their demise through poor choices and/or risky behavior, but can never lengthen their own lives. This applies to all humans be they Death Note users or not.


	9. Observational Experimentation

_Chapter 9_

 _Observational Experimentation_

 ** _A/N:_ _T_ _he_ _L_ _+Haruka relationship explained in musical form:_ _"The World" by Soulero_ _(_ _find it on YouTube. Monstercat 0_ _10_ _-_ _Conquest_ _)._**

 ** _Chrysanthemum_ _Sugar Spoon. Used the current exchange rate of US dollars to Japanese Yen, which is 1=121.11_**

 _ **ALSO I made a Polyvore just for fanfiction outfits, the link is can be found at the bottom of my profile. I had the sudden desire to see some of Haruka's outfits irl... The creativity is flowing! So, if you want to know 'What's in Haruka's Bag' or what her outfit in chapter 4 looked like (the day Light crossed the line) check it out!  
**_

 _ **Polyvore Username: rosewhite007**_

Haruka had never seen L consume anything resembling a balanced meal; he ate nothing but sweets. The human body couldn't possibly function well on a diet like that. Perhaps this was a partial explanation for his other strange habits? A lack of essential nutrients had led to the development of infantile tendencies including, but not limited to, thumb sucking and a refusal to wear socks or shoes.

He appeared to have problems with his back, but she'd realized that his bad posture was a preference rather than a physical deformity. She would have thought he needed a chiropractor had she not witnessed him standing at full height without trouble. There was no grimace, no sign of pain to be seen. Clearly his hunch back act served a purpose, maybe to keep others away? It _was_ exceptionally off-putting.

Ryuzaki sat in all chairs the same way, knees drawn up with his upper half curved forward, and he preferred to sit alone. She'd not once caught him on a couch. She could only guess where this inclination came from. He clearly didn't have mysophobia nor did he seem to have any anxiety issues; she refused to ask so she supposed she would never know.

He held things very delicately, often using only his fingertips to grasp small objects. She saw him with a cell phone at one point, holding it in that odd way with his wrist bent at a seemingly uncomfortable angle. He'd been on and back off the device quickly. He didn't seem to like telephones.

The rings under his eyes were permanent. He rarely slept and apparently suffered from some kind of disorder. Or multiple disorders. She thought that a definite possibility.

His clothing choices did not have variety. He wore a white long-sleeved shirt and blue jeans. Period. She'd never witnessed him in anything else and wondered if he had an unending supply of that one outfit. He didn't exude any obvious odor, so she assumed he _did_ change his clothing, but it was impossible to know for sure.

L's hair was always a mess, but it didn't seem tangled or dirty so he had to at least brush it on a regular basis. She could make no conclusions about how often it was washed; the man rarely saw the light of day so there was little opportunity for his hair to collect dirt or dust. Relying on the presence of an oily look was unreliable, different internal balances made for different hair types. He could be one of those people whose hair never seemed greasy.

A toothbrush was unquestionably something Ryuzaki owned. He had all his teeth and that wouldn't be possible without extreme attention given to his oral health, especially considering the incredible amounts of sugar he ingested. He probably flossed too. Unless his teeth had fallen out long ago and been replaced... She couldn't think of a way to check without being noticed so that was something else she'd never know the truth of.

He spoke almost exclusively in monotone with very little variance in pitch regardless of the subject. Not that she'd spent much time speaking with him, but she had overheard (read eavesdropped on) a few conversations between the task force members and his tone rarely altered. Be their discussion centered on recently deceased criminals or Matsuda's lack of insight his voice remained level.

/~/~/~/~/

" _What_ is that?" She jerked her chin at the table and the offending _thing_ that sat upon it.

"I assume your question is rhetorical."

So it was, but that didn't make her any less annoyed.

Flowers. They were flowers. A large glass vase full of them and covered in strings of pearls. It was obviously expensive.

And also an experiment.

"Don't want 'em."

He didn't seem disheartened or surprised; Haruka supposed that meant she'd reacted the way he'd thought she would.

She was tempted to push it off the table and shatter the vase, but that would pose a danger to herself and she thought he might expect it of her. She wasn't _that_ immature.

Instead she walked away, waited for him to close himself off in some other room and then overturned the decoration in front of the door he'd disappeared behind.

/~/~/~/~/

Ryuzaki wasn't _actually_ a thumb sucker and he'd taken offense to the insult, but she would use it again even though it wasn't technically correct because that was the first time he'd reacted so obviously to something she said. She'd also noticed him making a concerted effort to keep his hands away from his face, but it seemed the habit was difficult to break. There it was now, his thumb resting on his lower lip.

L was rude. He spoke without regard for the feelings of the other participants in conversation. He paid no heed to looks of shock and disregarded expressions of revulsion, like the one she was currently wearing as he followed her into the elevator.

Even in public, in a space where others walked regularly with God knew what on the soles of their shoes, he _wouldn't_ _put on_ _footwear._

"Gross, thumb sucker."

/~/~/~/~/

Insincere verses heartfelt.

Would she be able to tell the difference?

The gift of flowers had not gone over well, she'd been aware of the insincerity behind his actions as he'd predicted she would be. She had managed to surprise him with her reaction, it had been far more restrained than he'd expected; there was no shouting involved. Of course she'd then proceeded to send water flowing beneath the framework of a door, starting a small electrical fire and ruining a few copied files that had been left scattered on the floor, but all in all he thought the experiment a success.

Now for the next attempt.

"Gross, thumb sucker."

...

He shoved his hands into his pockets.

/~/~/~/~/

Ryuzaki had never seen Haruka wear the same outfit twice. Excepting her school uniform, which wasn't at all flattering, she appeared to carefully select her clothing. Everything she wore was fashionable, color coordinated and correctly sized. And, on the subject of the things she wore, her skirts tended to be on the short side though it was winter and very cold. He did not understand that trend.

High-heeled shoes were never worn in front of her father, instead she changed into/out of flats just outside the doorway. In order to accomplish this task she always carried two oversized tote bags with her out the door, where she placed the offending footwear, but he'd observed that she often left the building with only one. As it turned out she sometimes charged the front desk with the care of a bag and retrieved it when she returned to the hotel.

Her hair required constant maintenance and specialty products. She did not use shampoo and only truly cleansed her hair once a week, but brushing under running water was mandatory on a daily basis. A vinegar rinse was employed on occasion. She did not use the usual hair bands, hers were supposedly tangle-resistant and more expensive; even so he'd seen her forced to cut them out of her hair when she used them for ponytails. More than once he'd been tempted to pull one of her curls to see how long her hair really was, and to find out if it would bounce back, but so far he'd been able to quell the impulse.

She was useless before six in the morning and after midnight. A whiny, weepy, uncoordinated mess. She was rarely awake at either of those times, but it did happen infrequently. She would come shuffling through a room only to bump into the edge of a table or trip on the upturned corner of a rug. She'd once hit the floor and _stayed_ _there_ for the rest of the night.

If it took her more than ten minutes to fall to sleep she began complaining to her father. Or Watari. Whoever she came into contact with first.

When she was young Haruka embodied the phrase "cutting off the nose to spite the face". If she thought wounding herself would hurt someone who'd wronged her, she would do it. Chief Yagami had recounted her childhood tendency of purposely putting herself in harm's way to upset others or garner sympathy. They'd attempted to break her of the habit early on, but she'd recently displayed the same inclinations when making her family promise to keep her work life a secret from her brother, leading her to be more upset than the one she sought to insult. L thought it a case of nature winning out over nurture.

She'd lately participated in an incestuous relationship with her twin. Their contact had only been severed because her father believed she was suspected of being Kira and thought she was being kept for observational purposes; in fact that was partially the truth, but Light's chances of being guilty were much higher than his sister's. However she'd been in a vulnerable position and more easily accessible. Ryuzaki hadn't yet had the opportunity to cross-examine her, but the probability that her information would be useful stood around the seventy-five percent mark so he was willing to wait.

On her MP3 Player was a set of near one hundred songs that she listened to repeatedly. The most often played was titled Ordinary Day. The second: Whenever, Wherever. Her musical tastes varied, but the majority of her playlist was excessively sentimental. L had little interest in music, but this provided some insight.

Haruka's singing voice wasn't terrible, but neither would she win any contests with it. Her ability was modest and she may have benefited from lessons.

An expert eavesdropper she would never be. She was prone to sounds of annoyance when conversation lulled and too quick to give up listening. She remained unaware that he was cognizant of her attempts.

L had been told that Haruka's recent explosions of violence were out of character. Prior to their first meeting she'd expressed anger through silence. Her father was apologetic for her actions, but could offer no viable explanations.

/~/~/~/~/

"What is _that_?" She pointed to the huge, wrapped box in the entryway.

"I assume your question is rhetorical."

"Not this time."

"Generally one would open a container to find out its contents."

She didn't appreciate his condescending tone, as slight as the change in pitch had been she'd caught it.

This was another test, but curiosity was getting the better of her.

"You open it."

"If it's for you, shouldn't you be the one to open it?"

"Who says it's for me?"

He shuffled forward, lifted a large tag attached to the pink ribbon bow. "Well, would you look at that?"

 _Asahi, Haruka_

Instead of doing as he said she turned and dashed away, around a corner and down the hall. Matsuda was inside one of these rooms, she just had to figure out which.

L found her with an ear pressed to a door.

"Ah, ha!" She knocked once and pushed open the barrier. "Matsui-san," a stage whisper. "I need your help for just a second!"

Matsuda was quick to accept her fear that the top would be too heavy for her to lift and was easily persuaded to open the box for her. Yet she did not find the stereotypical carnival-sized teddy that she'd been expecting inside. Instead there was another box.

Her interest was captured and she gently shooed Matsuda away to finish the task of unboxing herself.

By the third box she'd forgotten Ryuzaki existed at all, let alone that he was the one who'd set the display up to be used for research.

At box number five her impatience got the best of her and she cursed.

Box number six looked to be the last and in her excitement she realized too late that she couldn't reach it without tipping into the opening.

"Ah!" Haruka released a short yelp as she found herself stuck, half inside and half out, kicking her legs in an effort to swing upright. She'd gotten hold of the last little box, but opening it would be impossible in her current position.

How long would it take her to ask for assistance?

L hypothesized it would be within five minutes. He knew Haruka wouldn't want help, more specifically she wouldn't want _his_ help, but he was the only one nearby and she had no means of getting herself out.

He recognized that his refusal to offer a helping hand might be interpreted as a lack of common decency and acknowledged that allowing her to remain in discomfort when he had the ability to change her circumstances was undeniably rude, however this was a central part of his investigation into her character and necessary.

Haruka counted two hundred forty-one seconds before accepting that Ryuzaki would not offer aid and resigned herself to requesting help, but it was another full minute before she could work around her pride to do it. When she emitted a loud, long sigh it had been _more_ than five minutes and it was at least another thirty seconds before she actually spoke.

She'd lasted longer than he thought she would, but she met his expectation of impolite behavior by refusing to acknowledge his role in extracting her from the trap.

Within the smallest container, a rectangular robin's egg blue box, was–

"A _spoon_?" It was decorated with a thin, white ribbon tied about the handle.

/~/~/~/~/

It was difficult to say whether or not she'd appreciated the gift. While she hadn't had a tantrum, thrown the utensil away or misused it, neither had she utilized it at all.

He concluded that she was not offended by this present, but it would be impossible to fully understand her reasoning without further observation.

/~/~/~/~/

What was the meaning of this 'gift'?

For two days now she'd been trying, and failing, to decipher the true significance behind Ryuzaki's actions. It was some kind of experiment, but what was the point? What had he learned about her through all of that?

Why did he even need to know anything more about her? Much to her chagrin she'd made her character painfully obvious; he knew how immature she truly was. Some of her reactions surprised even her, she'd not thought herself so vindictive or easily angered. In most situations she remained composed. Even if someone was ridiculing her to her face she could accept the abuse gracefully, with the expectation of making the insulter seem ridiculous.

She couldn't do that with L, but, then again, what had he done to her? That thing with her father was humiliating, but to be honest she wasn't sure Soichiro had understood the significance of the detective's words. Since then Ryuzaki'd not said much to her, hadn't _really_ provoked the wrath she'd unleashed. Her reactions were unwarranted. The worst part of it was that even though she realized how silly she was being, she couldn't stop the involuntary reactions.

In the dark she sat, in a new room once more. The process of switching hotels was not a burden to her, it always happened while she was at school, but she was growing tired of it all the same. It seemed that L was winding down on this precaution though. There had been no new leads, the household surveillance had been removed and all the task force had to go on were the continued deaths of criminals; unfortunately it appeared that Kira had claimed victory this round.

With all of that in mind, and taking into consideration the seriousness of the situation, he was choosing to spend time planning ways to test her. Was this related to the Kira investigation in some obscure way? If it was someone was going to have to clue her in because it didn't make a bit of sense to her.

The spoon.

What was the importance of a sugar spoon?! More than that, why did she want to understand so badly?

Elbows on the small round table, one leg crossed over the other, she held the spoon up in front of her face and rested a cheek within the other palm. She'd looked at the stupid thing a hundred times; researching it's origins left her even more confused than she'd been initially.

It was from Tiffany's, cost over twenty-one thousand yen. What the hell did he think she'd do with an absurdly expensive _spoon_? He was the sugarholic, not her. In fact she didn't think she'd ever eaten something sweet in front of him.

Maybe it was meant to be an insult. Perhaps he was implying that she needed to be sweeter.

Her fist came down on the tabletop and she bit her lip. There was only one way to know for sure, but that would mean asking the one who'd initiated the contest. Surely he was waiting for that, waiting for her to breakdown and demand answers. That would be playing right into his hand, she was sure of it.

And there was another problem, one she could hardly stand to acknowledge. Some tiny part of her, a stupid, irrational, ridiculous part, was shouting as loudly as it could that this was a good thing. It was the part that hadn't fully let go of the crush, the one that had been the most hurt by the things he'd said about her feelings.

She _knew_ it was dumb, so why couldn't that bit just shut up already? Ryuzaki had made it clear what he thought of her feelings. "Ill-conceived." That was what he'd called her. Misguided. Foolish. She refused to fall for a person like that, someone who could so easily belittle the affections of another.

It wasn't like she'd been in love with him and even if she had, even if she'd been so stupid as to love a person she didn't know much about, who was he to knock her down so carelessly?

Well, she knew him now and he was a Grade A Freak. A jerk. Altogether socially inept and– and...

And she still liked him!

What was _wrong_ with her?

There was no reason for this attraction. By all accounts she was way out of his league and under normal circumstances she wouldn't have looked in his direction twice. Well, maybe twice, but certainly not a third time and no way would she have looked long enough to start liking him. No way.

"No way."

This was probably Light's fault. After that illegitimate romance her subconscious was looking for his opposite and had bestowed the honor of being the fallback on L. That made sense, right? It wasn't so much _him_ that she liked as his differences from her brother. Prior to meeting him she'd already placed a lot of hope on Ryuzaki, so it only stood to reason that she would start to idolize him.

Even now she recognized that he was the world's best chance of stopping Kira.

All those reasons combined almost allowed her to forgive her own stupidity, but not quite. There was something else.

She called him a thumb sucker, knew it wasn't true, but did it anyway. Why? Not because she was trying to provoke him, but because she had to say something contrary to what was really going through her mind when he put his finger to his mouth.

"Of all the dumb things," _this was the dumbest._

Whenever he did that, whenever she noticed, it made her want to touch him. Pull his hand away or something, she wasn't sure what, but that urge needed to be squashed so she insulted him instead. Most of her insults stemmed from reactions like that.

Okay, so it was all of them.

Suffice it to say _that_ was why she couldn't forgive herself. Even if this was Light's fault _she_ was the fool in the end. It was her heart that would be emptied by the time this was over, not his.

L didn't know of her regard, he was too emotionally blind to see behind her actions. Criminals he could understand, but this was different. While he was testing her for reactions he missed the point. Haruka had little fear that she would be found out, but that didn't mean it wouldn't be safer to get rid of the blasted feelings.

The only problem was she didn't know how to do that.

/~/~/~/~/

She'd not been combative for the last few days, but now it was time for the cross-examination and he wondered if her new attitude would be able to withstand his questioning.

"I need to know that you are not Kira," he began. "And I need to know why you claim to suspect your brother of holding the title. Right now my suspicion of _you_ being the culprit stands at one percent, however that still places you in the second spot as the only person with a higher chance of being Kira is Yagami, Light.

"I have little evidence to support my belief in either case, but please be aware that should you do anything to suggest that _you_ are Kira you will immediately be placed under heightened security." He reached for his cake and instructed, "Start at the beginning. When did you first suspect Light of being Kira?"

"It was probably when he start getting so touchy-feely with me, which wasn't long after he found out about my work so... I guess it was at the start of December?" she cocked her head to the side. "Yeah, it definitely was because that was when I saw the red in his eyes. I remember thinking that he didn't have a soul."

"You felt like he didn't have a soul. Explain."

"I don't know, his eyes just seemed dead, like there was nothing inside. I thought he looked soulless, but it wasn't just that. The way he believed me so easily wasn't right, he just followed me up the stairs without a second thought. It was like he didn't even think for a second that he could misjudge what I was doing and he's been that way ever since. His ego is _huge_. I can't swear that he's Kira just because of that, but he isn't Light either and I think he _is_ Kira. Not only that, but I'm positive I know what his end-game plan is."

"And what would that be?"

"He wants to be God. He wants to rule the world and thinks he has the right. Whatever power he's gotten hold of, or maybe its gotten hold of him, has gone to his head. He looks at people differently now, like they're all scum. No one is good enough anymore."

L considered her words as he finished his first slice. "You're right. You don't have concrete evidence against him. However, your observations are valuable. I assume no one else is aware of the relationship you had with him?"

She shook her head violently. "No one."

"This letter," he pushed the paper forward. "Why did you write it?"

"Because I knew we would be under surveillance eventually and if L was in charge of the investigation he'd be the one ordering it. Ultimately it would make it's way to him and I thought some information was better than none."

He recognized that she didn't equate himself with L, but shelved that discussion for another time. "So it was. Why were you so sure that your household would be watched?"

"...It only makes sense, right? Even if it wasn't just us the police would be watched. Information was leaking out so–"

"And how do you know that?"

"Because it's obvious! Nothing the police did was working. Dad was home later and later every night, more tired than ever. If things had been going well that wouldn't have been the case. Also, Light seemed really smug. At one point I got him to show me what was on the home network. He had no trouble getting into the police files. I acted like I couldn't understand what I was looking at, but let me tell you...What I had to do for that–! UGH!" She shuddered. "Anyway it wasn't hard to figure out. Even if Light isn't Kira, someone else could hack in with minimal effort and why wouldn't they?"

"I should inform you that I've increased your chances of being Kira to two percent."

"Oh for-" she reached out and took his plate away, ignored the shock on his face. "Listen here, Ryuzaki! If I was Kira I would have given myself away by now _on purpose_. I would hate myself. I would be dead because I would've committed suicide. Do you know what I've done to get as much out of Light as I could? It's disgusting what I've allowed. My Dad would die of a heart attack if he ever found out.

"You know, I had to convince Light _not_ to kill our sister? He wasn't actively plotting her demise, but I knew he would, I could _feel_ it. She's the most innocent person on the face of the earth and he would kill her if he thought he could gain something from it. He was enraged when I said I'd kill myself if she ended up dead, mad at _me_ for it. He's Kira. I don't care if you put me in a padded room with a hundred cameras trained on me twenty-four hours a day, but you'll only be wasting your time because _I'_ _m not Kira_." She tossed her hair. " _You're_ stupid if you seriously think I am."

"In that case, tell me, how do you think Light commits his murders? And give that back."

She would have refused, but she'd known this question was coming and with her answer would be the crucial admission of a hidden truth. So, she pushed the plate back, waited until he'd taken another fork full and spoke. "I don't know for sure, but he needs a name and a face to kill. Seems like ESP or something, but even if that sounds crazy I would believe it. I," she hesitated and looked away, to the floor.

L noticed her change in countenance, but refrained from calling her out on it. It was interesting though. She'd switched from snappish to unsure in the blink of an eye.

"I would believe it was ESP because," another pause. He wasn't going to believe her, she knew he wasn't, but that didn't matter. What she said was the truth. "Because I have a– well, _power_ isn't the right word, but I have a strange ability. It comes and goes though," she spoke quickly. "I can't do anything about it except hold people at arm's length. If I don't care too much, I won't see anything about them." Her voice died and she watched him with guarded eyes, her hands clenched into fists. His expression hadn't changed; she couldn't tell what he was thinking.

Ryuzaki was unsure of what she expected him to do with that admittance. She hadn't even explained herself properly. He tried to make her continue, "Are you saying that you've experienced psychic phenomena?", but all he received in reply was a jerky nod of the head. "You think he could have an extrasensory power because you believe you have experience with one?"

"That's not the reason! I just don't have trouble thinking he might."

She was growing pouty. Her arms were crossed now. He could feel her irritation, but she needed to be more forthcoming with a description of what she thought she'd experienced. "Explain."

Haruka heaved a sigh. This was even more unpleasant than she'd thought it would be. Why did she have to care so much about what he thought of her? "I used to see the deaths of people I cared about. Two of my friends, years and years ago when I was in elementary school, passed away and I saw it before it happened. Once in middle school I was able to prevent a death, but lost the friendship because of the way I did it. I'd get a terrible pounding in my head and then I'd see it, like watching a movie, the death and how it happened. Recently, I saw that man who died after trying to take over a bus to Space Land. I didn't know him, but I'm sure Light was involved somehow. I was going to meet friends, it happened on the way and no one was around, but..." she took a deep breath. "The headache came and I saw a hand in a brown jacket lying in a puddle of blood."

" _Yeah, uh, I was just wondering, what kind of jacket did you wear this morning?"_

" _Sorry, sorry! Just tell me, was it brown?"_

He pulled the memory forward. Haruka had called her father on Wednesday December 20th at work, to ask about his choice of outerwear. He'd overhead the conversation. That had occurred nearly forty-five minutes before the death of Kiichiro, Osoreda.

" _Is it two shades of brown? Like darker near the wrist area? Also, are you planning on wearing it outside any time soon?"_

"I called everyone but Light because I knew he wasn't wearing a coat like the one I'd seen. Even so, he was the only one out besides me that day. I thought it was strange then and now I'm sure he was involved. I never got him to admit it, but he'd said he was going on a date. It was probably to Space Land and he was likely on that bus."

"Anything else?"

"Tch." He was as calm as ever. What did that mean? Did he believe her, think her insane or a liar, or maybe he was reserving judgment? "The last thing I saw was different. It was a dream, but it felt so real that when I woke up I had to go see if Light was still alive." Her eyes grew glassy as she recalled the horror of her nightmare. "He was in a warehouse, I don't know it," words jumbled together, "and he was _shot._ So many times! But he ran away," the tears spilled as grief took over. "He died _alone,_ " for her that was almost the worst part, but there was one thing even more troubling than that, "There was a demon. I only saw it for a moment, black wings and a grotesque face." She was openly sobbing now, but plowed ahead with the tale, "Then I saw Mom and Sayu at his funeral. Dad wasn't there and I realized he was dead too, but I don't know where I was. It didn't seem like I was there," and that was where she stopped with a gasp because, impossibly, Ryuzaki was standing over her, awkwardly patting her head.

It was irrational, she knew it as soon as the desire came, and he likely wouldn't thank her for it, but she _needed_ a hug.

/~/~/~/~/

L went stiff. Physical contact wasn't something he solicited or had much experience with, so even though he had an immediate reaction to keep from falling over Haruka's jumping into his arms was unexpected and he didn't know whether it was normal or not.

So there he was holding the seventeen year old beauty, he'd long ago recognized that she was good-looking, while she cried into his shoulder. One arm around her back and the other too close to her posterior for comfort, but it was that or drop her.

The real question was, what did he do now? He did not have the educational training to deal with this type of situation. Haruka was still crying, but the intensity was dying down. Was it appropriate to put her back in the chair yet? And what was he supposed to do after that? He needed to know more about what she'd seen in that dream, it would undoubtedly be insensitive to press for details, but he had to know.

A compromise then.

"Haruka," he felt her grip around his neck tighten. "Did you see anything else? Was there any sign of a date, anything to indicate when it happened?"

She shook her head and spoke with a muffled voice. "It was a while away, Sayu looked older at the funeral and she was in a wheelchair. Light seemed older too, at least a few years from now." She hiccuped. "It was all industrial, no trees. The ground was just dirt. I couldn't tell what season it was. Not winter though, he was breathing heavily as he ran," a few more tears leaked, "but I didn't see his breath, so it wasn't cold."

"Hm."

She couldn't be sure that he believed her, but at the very least he hadn't pushed her away, even though she'd thrown herself at him. She'd half thought he would toss her off the second she made contact.

"Actually," she paused. This was something she hadn't told Light, but L needed every detail she could give him. "I saw someone else too. Someone I don't know. I didn't tell Light this part, I thought he'd try to find him, well, I'm _sure_ he would have. He looked young, maybe a middle schooler, his hair was white–!"

She hit the floor hard with a shout, "Ouch! Ryuzaki!", but it seemed he hadn't heard her as he moved, more quickly than she'd ever seen before, out the door. She scrambled to her feet, attempted to follow, but he was already out of sight.

/~/~/~/~/

 _Near_.

How was that possible?

"Roger."

"L!"

"Where is Near?"

"Near? Here of course, asleep I'd think, but..."

"That's fine. He does not need to be informed of this."

"Alright. If that was all-?"

"Yes."

As per usual he ended the conversation without a formal goodbye.

"Watari, keep an eye on on Near."

"Yes, Ryuzaki. However, I would like to say that if I were to be concerned about anyone it would be Mello."

"You may say so and under normal circumstances I would tend to agree. Look into the surveillance from the bus involved in the Kiichiro, Osoreda incident in December." He offered nothing more in the way of explanation. Instead he ambled from the room, only to face an aggravated female.

"Ryuzaki, I realize that I surprised you when I, you know," she shifted uncomfortably. "Well, it was a surprise to me too, but you didn't have to _drop me_."

Rather than apologize he requested more detail. "Tell me what the boy was like."

"Eh? What he was like? He was weird, as weird as you. I don't know what it was about him, maybe the way he touched his hair like you," she slapped his hand away from his mouth. "Do _that_. Or, maybe the way he sat on the floor...? I can't be sure, but I feel like you must be related."

It was certainly Near she spoke of.

"You said you kept this from your brother."

"I did. I was afraid he would try to find out who the boy was." She turned as L slouched past her, followed closely to keep from loosing sight of him again. "Why? Do you know him? The boy with the white hair?"

"I believe I do."

Her eyes widened. "What? Really?!"

"Really." He turned his attention to the task force. They were gathered in the main room, looking over files of the recently deceased. "Haruka is still under suspicion of being Kira," he announced, drawing sighs, frowns and one loud huff. "Her chances of being Kira have been increased from one percent to two percent. Because of this she will remain under quasi-house arrest. Nothing changes."

"Ryuzaki," Soichiro spoke from the couch. "Is this really necessary?"

"Yes." He could feel her glaring holes into the back of his head. "Even if she isn't Kira, I feel that she may be targeted by him. It is best to keep her close."

Haruka watched her father deflate. He was surely growing tired of all this, the waiting and watching. There wasn't much to be done; she knew he acknowledged the truth of the situation, but that didn't make it any easier. He had to hate being on the sidelines. Kira seemed to have the upper hand, but it was only a matter of time before the scales tipped again. What really mattered was being able to recognize when events started moving in their favor and whether or not they were prepared to act quickly.

She looked to Ryuzaki. As much of a genius as he was, as amazing as his abilities as a detective were, he was clueless about how she really felt and would likely never catch on either. If jumping into his arms wasn't enough of a hint she didn't know what would be; she'd cursed herself for that, afraid he would find what she was hiding, but he remained in the dark.

It was probably better that way. Did she even want him to understand? He would mock her again, except this time the ridicule would be fully deserved. She _knew_ what he was like and wanted to be with him anyway.

Her teenager tendencies were finally kicking in. She'd never had a crush before, now she choose the person least likely to return her feelings as her target. Some irony! At least her friends liked reasonable people. Boys their own age, people they saw regularly and got along with. She'd looked down on them for it, but now she envied their choices. Even Sayu's crush on Ryuga, Hideki made some sense; he was a celebrity and appeared to his best advantage at all times.

L was too interesting. When she thought of it, it did make sense that she would like someone similar to him. She'd always found everyone boring and easy to understand; L was neither of those things. She'd pegged him a freak, still thought he was, but apparently she liked freaks so...

"You can go," he waved a hand without looking at her.

...so she was stupid.

 **Other Facts**

A human may avoid their date of death, but only if someone else gives up something to prevent the death. This may be done unwittingly.


	10. Emotional Emotions

_Chapter 10_

 _Emotional Emotions_

 _ **A/N: Polyvore username: rosewhite007**_

 _ **Reminder: Light+Haruka song: "Ideekay" by Ephixa – L+Haruka song: "The World" by Soulero**_

"Haruka-chan, did you get a boyfriend?"

"Wha–? No way!"

"Really? I could swear you did! You keep smiling like something good happened."

"No, no. Definitely not."

Unless someone thought Light counted as a boyfriend, but he certainly didn't evoke involuntary smiles. She would have to be more careful with facial expressions. God forbid her father realize something was amiss; he would likely tell Ryuzaki. Even worse if Light caught wind of her unrequited affection! She could only imagine what his reaction would be.

Shock. Fury.

She'd eaten lunch with him that afternoon, followed without comment when he took her to an unused classroom in the older part of the building, and let him have his way with her. He didn't try for much, but it was clear that he was frustrated with the lack of contact.

"When will they let you come home?"

He blamed her for her continued absence. It was obvious he thought she could be doing more to get herself away from L, but that really wasn't the case. She didn't have to lie about that and though he didn't like it he'd accepted her excuse.

"L thinks I have a two percent chance of being Kira. I know that doesn't sound like much, but it's more than anyone else." Almost. "So there really isn't anything I can do except prove that I'm not Kira. But, I'm not there often so it's a little hard."

He'd been pacified by her words, allowed his mind to stray when she said she missed him.

Reaching for his hand, leaning close and kissing him was all it took to change the flow of his thoughts.

It was almost too easy, she worried that it _was_ too easy, but he didn't seem to suspect that anything was wrong and she wasn't about to look a gift horse in the mouth. Keeping Light happy was still important; if there was any way to change that horrific future she would find it.

Kira would have to die, but did Light need to leave the world alone in an abandoned warehouse? She couldn't let it happen. Even after all the things he'd done, all the things he was still doing, she didn't want that for him. She could hardly think of a worse ending. His life should have been so bright, so full of purpose! How had he taken such a dark turn?

He could have been like L. She saw similarities between the two of them. Light wasn't outwardly peculiar, but they seemed so much alike. She couldn't put her finger on what it was, but L and Light had something in common; at least, they had at one time. The old Light would have worked well with Ryuzaki. They would have been friends.

That was the core of her problem. The old Light. She was still looking for him, searching for any vestiges that might remain, yet she had the sense that her brother didn't exist anymore. She honestly couldn't see him, even buried deep within Kira.

Nothing about Light was the same. He didn't look at people the same way, he didn't speak the same way, he didn't act the same way... There was nothing. Even the way he carried himself was different.

"Hey, Haruka-chan, I got your magazine!"

The publication was produced for inspection during an unforeseen free period and lauded over by her classmates. Haruka was obliged to blush and attempted to downplay the importance of this milestone, but as she'd expected it would be her humility was brushed aside in favor of more praise.

"–with Misa-Misa!"

"–already in a major magazine and it's really amazing that–,"

It was all anticipated, the words and phrases were unoriginal. She'd heard similar things before, but she recognized that some of this praise wasn't genuine. There was jealousy brewing, but the end of high school was on its way and would act as a cushion against any blows classmates tried to land. There wouldn't be time for fighting or petty arguments with important college entrance exams on the horizon.

"I bet Light's super worried you'll come home with some amazing boyfriend!"

That called her attention back to the conversation. Of course Light would crop up somehow. He always did.

She answered sharply, "I don't think that's on his mind at all. He studies too often to have time for thoughts like that." It was better to put a stop to this line of thinking quickly.

"How could he not think about that? He wouldn't say it obviously, but you're so close that it would weird for him to ignore it."

"Ahh," someone else whined, squirming in her seat. "Why couldn't I have a brother like Light? Mine is such a slob!"

The conversation took a turn from there and despite her best efforts Haruka was unable to change the topic. She was subjected to a ten minute discussion on Light and all the reasons that he was better than other brothers. In the end he was bestowed the title of Best Onii-chan by the girls in her class and she was sure it would soon spread.

"I think I'd call him Onii-sama, though," Sakura sighed.

"Just thinking about that could give me a nosebleed."

"Haruka-chan, what do you call him?" Minna asked.

"Just his name usually."

"'Usually'. So, when you want help or something, you call him _cutely_ right?"

Of all the vapid, unimportant, ridiculous...

"Sometimes." There were things they wanted to hear and this was one of them. Also, it was true. She'd called him 'Onii-chan' more times in the last few weeks than she had in the past decade.

"Hey," a pair of bright, mischievous eyes looked to her. "The next time Light comes to talk to you, call him 'Onii-chan', okay?"

"What!?" That was unexpected. "No way!"

"Yeah, do it for us!"

" _Please_ , Haruka-chan? We want to see how he reacts!"

"He won't react. He'll just say whatever he came to say and leave. Like always."

"So you say, but if that's the case then there's no problem!"

What kind of request was this? She failed to keep the grimace from her face as she took in the eager looks of the girls around her. This was something they really did want. To turn them down might be dangerous to her position.

"Okay, okay! I just have to say it right?"

"Do it cute!"

"That's too much!"

/~/~/~/~/

She was dreading it. All the way to the location of her shoot she was dreading it. All the way to the hotel she was dreading it. All the way to the elevator, all the way down the hall, all the way into the room and past the task force she was dreading it.

L noticed.

Watari was given the task of learning the secret.

"What?" she'd asked, with a harried look in her eye.

"Ryuzaki would like to know what is troubling you. He would have asked himself, but there was an important discussion."

She was reluctant. "It's really nothing."

"Nothing is nothing."

He seemed so genuinely concerned that she told him without meaning to. "It's so stupid! I mean really, it is _that_ dumb, but it bothers me sooo much!"

"What is it that bothers you, Asahi-san?"

She put her cheek to the table, looking toward the window. "Today a bunch of girls in my class started talking about my brother. They do it all the time. Usually I can change the topic, but they were stuck on Light. A lot of things were said and in the end I agreed to call him 'Onii-chan' the next time he comes to talk to me during school. It's so embarrassing!"

Watari was at a loss for words. He had experience with adolescents, the Whammy House was full of them, but his brand of child was generally too busy with their individual interests to have time for problems like this. He'd thought he had a good grasp on young adulthood; dealing exclusively with geniuses had left him with a narrow view.

He was saved from being made to answer though. Once she'd begun, Haruka could hardly stop.

"I mean, why? Why ask me to do that of all things? They crowed him Best Onii-chan right before telling me they wanted me to say it to him! How can they make that kind of assumption? They don't know him!" She stood suddenly, took to pacing. "Okay, so they think they know him. That's not really their fault, they only see him at school and there's a lot of unaccounted for time that they have no clue about. I don't understand why they think everything must be so perfect!"

"Asahi-san, perhaps they–"

"I know that isn't exactly their fault either, but still! How can they make me do something so embarrassing?!"

"The only part of your life they are aware of is what you allow them to see."

"I know! But, still! Why? Why that!?"

"Obviously they think it will be entertaining in some way."

"Oh right, really funny to humiliate me!"

"Perhaps that isn't the way they perceive it."

"Tch." She bit her thumb. "I know that too. They all like Light, but they don't know him. It's dumb to like someone you don't know, right?"

"Things like that can be involuntary."

 _Involuntary._

"Right, but still."

A slight smile came to the face of the older man. It had been a long while since he'd participated in such an informal conversation and this one was proving to be diverting.

"Asahi-san, I suspect this now has less to do with your classmates and more to do with yourself."

"What? No. No way," she shook her head violently. "Not me. Well, just a little, but I am _so_ over that."

"'That' being–?"

"Nothing. _That_ is nothing."

He considered her denial. "Ah. You're speaking of the slight sensitivity," he put it as delicately as he could. "You held for Ryuzaki."

"NO! Not Ryuzaki! That was for L and it was _nothing_. And still is. It's _nothing_."

"I notice that you speak in the present tense."

That was when she froze, sank to the floor, put her hands on her head and muttered, "I want to die. Right now. I want to die right now!"

/~/~/~/~/

Watari would not tell L. Even if she hadn't made him promise, threatened to harm herself if he went against his word, he would not have told the detective. This was something Ryuzaki would have to find out on his own.

It was a fascinating turn of events. To think that L could have captured the interest of Haruka without putting any effort into the endeavor... Of course, that was likely the reason her regard was possible in the first place. Had L attempted to make himself endearing, and Watari could not even imagine what that might entail, she may well have denied him.

As things stood there was nothing he could do to help Ryuzaki recognize the feelings Haruka was harboring, but L would probably find the challenge interesting enough to search for an answer on his own.

In fact, at that very moment, L was growing curious about the secret. Watari had made a promise to remain mum on the subject of Haruka's unwitting confession, but that did not mean L was unaware that _something_ had been said. He was very conscious of the fact that Watari had spent near twenty minutes conversing with the girl and for him to offer no explanation, except to say that her problem would resolve itself, was unusual.

What sort of secret could Watari be sharing with her?

They got along well enough, but he'd not seen anything to indicate that they were especially close. It was possible that Haruka was somewhat reminded of her own father when she spoke with Watari, he did have a paternal aura and he was very good at dealing with children; perhaps she'd spoken of something to him that she would not tell her own father.

What could that thing be?

She'd been upset at his speaking of her feelings to Chief Yagami and it stood to reason she may have another problem like that. She would not want to tell her father about 'boy troubles'.

So, who was the boy?

Not Light. She wouldn't have told Watari about that. Ryuzaki was the only one in on that particular secret and he knew she had no plans to expose the relationship to anyone. Someone she went to school with? But, no. She was almost as bad as her brother when it came to the way she looked at people. She'd never indicated a preference for anyone in her immediate surroundings. Maybe it was someone she worked with.

Again, that didn't ring true. He'd had her followed on more than one occasion and she hadn't been more than friendly to any of the men she'd come into contact with through modeling. That wasn't to say they had been uninterested in her _,_ but she categorically turned down offers to go out.

He could think of no explanation. Unless–

Watari saw the moment L realized the truth. He also saw him try to deny it. It was a subtle widening of the eyes followed by a small shake of the head.

That couldn't be right. It didn't make enough sense. Haruka had made it clear that she no longer held any feelings but disdain for himself. He'd greatly offended her and even though she appeared to have moved beyond the anger it was unlikely that she would return to that first set of emotions.

He knew she didn't hate him, she would not have sought comfort from him if she did, but that was a far cry from a crush. She didn't refuse to speak to him, but that meant nothing. It would have been more telling if she had.

"Watari."

"Yes, Ryuzaki?"

"What did she tell you?"

"I'm sorry, Ryuzaki. As I said before I promised not to tell a soul."

If what he suspected was correct that kind of promise was definitely in line with Haruka's thinking. She would not only be embarrassed, but disappointed in herself. However it did seem out of character for her to keep this quiet. He would have expected her to declare herself without hesitation.

Perhaps she would have if he'd not insulted her so thoroughly the first time.

"Is there nothing you can tell me?"

The older man considered this petition. She had not forbidden him to speak of her most pressing problem. "Her distress this evening was due to a request from various classmates that she speak to her brother in a particular way."

L frowned.

"More specifically they asked her, and she reluctantly agreed, to call her brother by a perceived term of endearment the next time he goes to speak with her in her classroom."

That was one mystery solved, but the other was far more important.

He left the room, wandered toward her designated space, and stood outside the entrance debating whether or not he should confront her.

If he was right, to accuse her would only earn him a door slammed closed in his face; to even hint at his suspicion would cause the same reaction. If he was wrong she would laugh at him.

What kind of response did he want anyway? Which was the better outcome? What did any of this mean and why was he so concerned?

His eye twitched. That was incorrect. He was not concerned.

L had never seen the point in lying to oneself; after twenty seconds of internal debate he acknowledged the truth.

She opened the door when he knocked, took a step back in shock and made to shut the barrier again, but he took hold of her arm before she could do it.

"Your feelings are not wholly unrequited."

Haruka slammed the door in his face after shoving him away.

/~/~/~/~/

" _Your feelings are not wholly unrequited."_

What–- What kind of confession was that!?

"Haruka-chan, you're smiling again. There has to be guy involved!"

She put a hand over her mouth as she shook her head. She couldn't take him seriously with a declaration like that, she might have misunderstood. It was too ambiguous.

" _Your feelings are not wholly unrequited."_

Why was it so impossible to be straightforward? This was important! Could he not just say, "I like you too," or "I like you, but not like _that_ ,"? Which was it? It could be either one!

She refused to get her hopes up over this. He would have to clarify his words before she would allow herself any kind of hope.

"I wonder if Light will come today?"

"Our classes both have a free hour at ten, so I bet he will!"

"He'd better. I can't wait to see how he reacts!"

" _Your feelings are not wholly unrequited."_

To L that probably seemed like a definitive statement, but if that was the case then he really was socially inept. There were too many ways to interpret it. If he was unsure of how he felt he could have said so. Making such a confusing announcement did her no good.

Class started then and Haruka was forced to put her irritation, and a small measure of happiness, aside. The day rolled on, from one class to the next, until at ten o'clock the free period arrived. It was then that she remembered the promise she'd made and as her friends had predicted he would Light did come to her classroom.

"Okay, Haruka-chan! Go!"

"Do it for us!"

The whispers of encouragement did little to calm her nerves. She could feel their anxious stares as she approached the doorway, saw Light notice the way her schoolmates were hyper focused on the two of them.

She briefly wondered what he was thinking, but his face gave nothing away. Whether he was annoyed or confused, she couldn't tell. More than likely he didn't much care.

She squared her shoulders; if she was going to do it she might as well go all the way.

When she was almost directly in front of him she 'tripped' forward, one foot catching on the other. Light caught her.

She could hear the suppressed squeals.

So could Light and he had to work to keep his expression neutral. It was obvious to him that Haruka was putting on a show, to what purpose he couldn't say, but there was probably a convoluted train of thought behind it. He couldn't be sure whether he wanted to know or not.

Standing upright once more she kept a hand on his arm, took a step closer, and the kiss she pressed to his cheek was met with a not-so subtle explosion on the other side of the room.

"Thank you, Onii-chan."

His smile seemed genuine to everyone else, and they were all watching by that point, but Haruka detected a hint of arrogance. Even so he preformed flawlessly by moving a hand to her shoulder, putting the other behind her head, and kissing her forehead before saying, "I wouldn't let my dear imōto fall."

/~/~/~/~/

Haruka didn't think she was ever going to hear the end of this one.

"He—He is so _perfect_!"

"I'm dying. I'm dying! I can't stand it!"

One girl had gone to the infirmary after passing out.

"I can't believe it happened like that!"

"AH!"

More than one had a nosebleed.

"The only thing that could have made it better, well, besides _me_ being in your position, would have been him actually kissing you!"

" _What_?!" She couldn't be serious. "That's so gross, Minna! What are you saying?"

"For anyone else it would be nasty, but I'd forgive it with you and Light!"

"Me too!"

"I'd pay to see it."

They were something else, but she doubted their sincerity. Had they been aware of what truly happened when she was left alone with him they wouldn't have been so supportive, right?

Then again, looking at their faces, they might have liked it just as much as they claimed they would.

"You can stop that right now because it isn't happening."

If by some twist of fate Light really did take over the world and she was made to stay with him, it seemed that her friends wouldn't abandon her over it.

"Never say never, Haruka-chan! All it would take is for you to see Light like we do, just one time, and you'd be hooked too! We could never blame you for it."

Their thoughts were so careless. If their relationship ever became public knowledge they would surely eat those words. They enjoyed the idea of it, but in reality? That would be different.

She folded her arms and leaned on the desk. "What if I told you Light and I had already done things, what would you say?"

Multiple pairs of hands met her person and she was suddenly being rocked back and forth. "Did you?! Did you!?"

Haruka shook her head, exasperated. "Of course not! I'm just saying 'what if'. I mean think about it. That wouldn't actually be okay with you, would it? _Really_ think about it."

At least they took this request seriously. The three girls sat in quiet contemplation for several minutes.

Minna was the first to speak. "I know what you're saying, but I really think it would be fine. It's like a whole new world, right?"

"Yeah, criminal activity is way down," Yuuki added. "Thanks to Kira."

 _Thanks to Kira_.

Yuuki continued, "Maybe last year I wouldn't have supported something like that, but it seems trivial now. People who aren't doing anything wrong should just be happy."

"I know you don't support Kira, Haruka, and I still think it's wrong to kill people too, but– I guess I can't help being relieved anyway," Sakura confessed. "It feels so much safer. There used to be a mugger in my area, but he's gone now. I don't know that he died, actually I don't think he did because I'm pretty sure I saw him in town, but he's stopped breaking the law. That's good, right?"

This wasn't an argument she could have. It was too easy to understand Sakura's position, it was the one most people held now. They didn't know Kira, to them he was almost a god; if she had been as uninformed she might have fallen into that trap with them.

"I guess if you and Light really were together that wouldn't seem like such a big deal. So many things are changing. People who really love each other can be together, right?"

"I'm not saying I think you should, Haruka," Minna told her. "Even if that would be the stuff of legend, and I will continue to root for that route because it would be great to watch, but it'd be fine if you did."

Classes resumed soon after that and Haruka found herself lost in haze of thoughts.

Kira really was winning. He'd won the majority of the public, at least in Japan. There were still some who didn't, a few who refused to, openly support him, but many were resigned and slowly growing to appreciate the new level of comfort.

What they failed to recognize was that it couldn't last. Haruka could see the outcome of this. If Light did claim victory and Kira became God of the New World, things would quickly devolve into chaos.

This was where Light failed miserably; he'd always been too idealistic. He was handing down 'justice' without thinking about the reality that would come later. He was completely disregarding human nature. People were not made to be ruled by fear, but they would seize power at the first opportunity and use that style themselves.

If Kira came to power he would have supporters, massive numbers of them, but there would still be those against it. What would happen to _those_ people? The supporters would happen. Even if it was only a tiny percent of them that took the initiative others would soon follow and violence would return in full force.

She could imagine it. They would burn buildings owned by non-supporters, torch their cars, drag them out for public beatings and kill them in the streets.

Kira could not erase human nature and at the moment she couldn't be sure whether or not Light would be against that kind of behavior. If he wasn't the entire world would go up in flames, but Light was one for order. Everything in it's place. She didn't think he would be content with pandemonium; what would he do though? Killing the instigators would be his only option.

Even more death and then the world would be ruled by a monster. Everyone balancing on the tip of a needle, terrified of the new God who killed people who didn't support him _and_ those who were too enthusiastic.

Life wasn't perfect now, but it would be even worse if Kira was in charge. People were too blind to see it and she could foresee the type of blowback that would come if anyone pointed these problems out to the public, but maybe she could still bring it up to Light.

She'd have to ask him out on a date.

/~/~/~/~/

She ate lunch with him again.

"They asked you to do that?" Disbelief in his tone, haughtiness in his eyes and a smirk on his face.

"Not exactly," she muttered. "They wanted to see what you would do if I called you 'Onii-chan'."

"And you improvised the rest?"

She nodded with a pout. He could never know about the things they'd said in the wake of that disaster. If she'd known they would take it to that level she wouldn't have done any of it.

Light moved forward, pressed his mouth to hers. They'd been too far apart for too long and his patience was waning.

Did L truly think Haruka was Kira? He was a fool if he did and yet it did indicate the possibility of increased surveillance on their household. The cameras and wiretaps were long gone, but more could be on the way. Perhaps there would be another informant sent to follow him. If that happened it would be unwise to kill them. He'd gotten away with Penber's death by the skin of his teeth; had Misora told anyone of her suspicions he may well have been found.

Having his twin on the inside could be an asset, but he needed to find a way to propose the idea of passing information without making it seem like he was using her. She would never agree if she thought all he wanted her for was exclusive data.

Now wasn't the time and his thought processes were quickly shutting down anyway, her hands were in his hair, her tongue in his mouth. She was pushing him, before he knew what was happening she had him lying flat on the floor, and was purposefully sliding down his body.

This was dangerous. They weren't likely to be discovered, but it was a possibility.

"Haruka, we shouldn't–" his attempt to dissuade her was half-hearted and fruitless.

"Sush, _Onii-chan_." Her grin was like his own. "You can't go back to class like this. I'll just take care of it for you..."

It would have been a lie to say that he hadn't desired this. For weeks, ever since she went away in fact, he'd been in discomfort. Taking care of the problem himself was unsatisfying and the introduction of another just as worthless. There was no one but Haruka.

He was seeing stars in minutes and she was prodding him to return the favor, though in a different way.

"I don't want that in school, it's too strange for me."

He rolled his eyes.

"Take me out instead. I have next Sunday clear."

/~/~/~/~/

She returned to yet another hotel around five-thirty. The outdoor photo-shoot had gone well and even ended a bit early. Her manager sent her off with a few proposals to consider. The agency had received numerous requests for her to appear in various ad campaigns; a couple included television spots.

"Haruka, there's a box for you. I brought it from home."

It felt nice to throw her cares to wind and open an unexpected package, which she did by unceremoniously plopping on the floor and tearing into the container, tossing aside packing paper to get to the contents.

The postage indicated that it had come from YouToo, the makeup company she'd agreed to promote, and their parcel didn't disappoint.

She laid out the different cosmetics in a pattern before retrieving her camera.

Her photography was largely ignored. The older men were eating pizza, something she'd noted they often did, while Ryuzaki spelled out the next phase of the program.

"Unless Kira does something overtly provoking we're backing off, at least in appearance. As I told you previously I do have a plan, but it cannot be put into action yet and it would be unwise to delve into specifics too early."

She caught that phrase. It seemed L rarely used specifics when dealing with important matters.

Rather than dwell on her bitterness she began dividing the makeup by type. Lipstick, lipgloss, eye shadow, everything with it's kind.

Her photos turned out well and were quickly posted with a note extolling the company's good points and referencing her own use of the products, along with a disclosure that they'd asked her to try their makeup while assuring her audience that she wouldn't recommend anything she didn't like.

She spent a bit of time replying to the first few comments before signing off for the day. There were other things to think about, like her upcoming date with Light.

"Hey, Dad?"

The task force hadn't been busy lately; they'd been sent back to the office more than once and spent many full days away from the hotel. Kira's activities had decreased, followed a predictable pattern and were as untraceable as ever.

Soichiro found solace in having more time to spend with his family, though one member was noticeably absent. The loss of Haruka's presence hit the household hard. Even Sayu was dispirited by her missing sister and asked, constantly, when she would be allowed to return. He wasn't able to provide much consolation; being told that she was well was not the same as having daily contact, as his wife had reminded him more than once.

He'd spoken to L privately to no avail, his thoughts far from reassuring. Haruka had managed to up her chances of being Kira during her one-on-one interview with the detective and, for the life of him, Soichiro couldn't think of what she might have said or done that led to that outcome.

Even so, she was not much restricted in her movements and Light remained the number one suspect.

Knowing that his eldest children were under suspicion of being a psychotic mass murderer, who may or may not have some kind of extrasensory power, was nearly intolerable. With his background in the justice system and strong core beliefs he couldn't ignore L's concern, but they remained innocent in his eyes. He admitted he may be biased, having known the two since they were in diapers, and as their father he sought to see the best in them, but the truth was that there was no hard evidence against either Light or Haruka.

"I have a date next Sunday and–"

Innocent in some ways, though not all.

This was one of the things he least wanted to hear coming from the mouths of his daughters. Light was another matter, but Soichiro's feelings were not based on gender bias. Their personalities were different. He worried less about Haruka than Sayu, but the elder was nearing adulthood and with a career in the entertainment industry, an idea that had never before entered his mind, his concerns had ballooned.

Who were those people behind the cameras? What was her agency, Float, doing to ensure she worked only with reputable companies? Should she have a bodyguard? Was the guidance of her manager sound?

Despite the meetings he'd insisted on being involved in as Haruka began this new phase of life he still felt unsettled.

He'd always expected to see the two go off to college together. Perhaps on in different courses of study, maybe even to different schools, but this was a departure from what he'd counted on. Financial planning had been thrown out the window in Haruka's case. Her cut of the education fund was now under debate; should it be given to her? Should they continue to save? Should it be spent on a long, well deserved vacation to a remote, tropical island?

Since her Dinner Declaration Soichiro had spent many hours in quite contemplation. It wasn't that her request was outrageous, but to think of her moving out on her own...

"Dad? Did you hear me?"

 _Yes_. Of course he'd heard her! She had a date coming up. A _date_.

Should she move away when would he learn of things like that? Surely she wouldn't be as forthcoming with that information if she was out of the family home.

"Who with? Someone from school?" He hoped. Oh, _God_ , he hoped it was just a boy from school and not some pretty, boy-bandesque fellow model who routinely got into scandals with others in the profession and–-

"Yeah, he's from school."

What kind of boy from school? Did he have good grades? Was it the boy who followed Light in the rankings? He seemed almost acceptable, but was Haruka interested in that? Probably not. She routinely poked fun at Light for his studying habits. More likely she would be drawn to the outsider type. The punk type. The rebel wannabe with hair dyed an unnatural color who was older than her because he'd been held back a few times type and–-

"Dad, it's Light! I'm going out with Light! Geez! Calm down! Kira's not going to have to give you a heart attack, you'll have one all on your own."

The pulsing vein in his forehead ebbed as relief colored his face.

"With Light?"

"YES."

Crisis averted.

/~/~/~/~/

"Wow, Chief! Haruka-chan might be right, you need to stay calm. I'm sure she wouldn't go out with someone you can't approve of."

"You're probably right." Matsuda's words were of little comfort, but he did appreciate the attempt.

"Yumi is still in elementary school," Aizawa spoke. "And I can't imagine what my reaction will be when she comes home and says she has a date." A horrified expression came to his face as he shook his head and said, "No, I really can't imagine it."

L observed the conversation with slight interest; this was something he had no experience with. He did not feel compelled to contribute yet, though he did consider that Haruka's expected behavior would have been normal for her age. He thought it stranger that she'd not had boyfriends in the past, as the Chief was now explaining.

"I guess it was just a shock. She's never come home with news like that before and I wasn't expecting it. Sayu is far more prone to crushes than Haruka."

"Is it possible that she has been on dates before and not told you?"

The team looked to him with wide eyes, but L paid no attention to that. His gaze rested on Yagami as he waited for an answer.

The older man considered the question, but answered in the negative. "Someone would have known. Light, her sister, even her mother. She may not have told me, but I would be aware. None of the children leave the house without providing specifics."

"When I was her age I often left the house for days without telling anyone where I was going or explaining my absence when I returned." He either failed to notice the air of awkwardness that had descended upon his team or didn't care. "I don't recall that anyone was particularly concerned."

Matsuda tried to dispel the heavy atmosphere. "Uh, Ryuzaki! Why don't you tell us more about when you were a kid! I bet it'd be really interesting to hear about how you grew up!"

L thought over the request. He was disinclined to agree.

"Yeah, Ryuzaki," Haruka returned to the main living area, sat on the floor beside L's plush chair. "Tell us a story about when you were young."

His eyes narrowed. He knew an insult when he heard one, especially when it was as thinly veiled as that. "To speak as though I was once young but now am not is an improper use of terms. I don't think I fit the popular definition of 'old', Asahi-san. But, I suppose I can tell you something about when I was _younger_."

"Great!"

"Matsui," Aizawa muttered as he elbowed the younger man in an effort to curb his enthusiasm. Out of all of them Shuichi was the one who liked L the least. He was still unable to fully trust the strange man; Aizawa was committed to his job, L seemed to be the only one able to hold the line against Kira and he held a certain amount of respect for the detective, but that meant nothing when it came to friendly feelings.

"I had many traps set in my room," Ryuzaki revealed. "One of them involved a large spray bottle full of paint. I did not think anyone foolish enough to attempt a break-in, but one day I returned to find multiple children coated in yellow. Obviously they had tried, and failed, to gain access to my room, but none could be persuaded to explain why they'd endeavored to get past the locked door to a space they'd been expressly forbidden to enter."

Haruka picked up on the hint he'd dropped and decided that it was more than an accident. 'Multiple children'. Did he have siblings? Most people wouldn't refer to family members that way though. Children he was not related to yet lived with.

"Ryuzaki," she asked suddenly, interrupting Matsuda mid-sentence as he spoke of some similar childhood experience. "Did you grow up in a group home?"

An incomprehensible looked crossed his face as his eyes found hers, only to smooth into his usual blank stare. "I did."

"And you won't elaborate?"

"I won't."

"Never?"

He didn't answer.

/~/~/~/~/

The relief on her father's face when he realized she wasn't about to elope with a bum was almost comical. Hearing that she was going out with her brother had brought instant comfort; if he'd known the truth–

But, he didn't and he never would if she had anything to say about it. She hoped that secret was going to follow her into the grave. Ryuzaki had shown no interest is speaking of it, as yet there was no benefit to revealing the twisted relationship, but she couldn't be sure it would never come up.

There was no sense in worrying about it. Even he had some idea of how badly that revelation would be received. If he did like her, and that was a big 'if', he would keep his mouth shut.

That was another problem she would need to solve. Finding out how L felt would be as simple as asking, she didn't think he'd lie, but when was the right moment for that? And why should she have to ask in the first place? He could tell her on his own time. Maybe hearing nothing more from her would teach him a lesson in the importance of speaking about emotions with clarity.

She had other things to be concerned about, like what she would wear on her day out with Light.

To wear a skirt might be inviting trouble, but would be appropriate given it was supposed to be a date. She didn't think he would be pulling her into any seedy alleyways or low-class love hotels, he was too far above that, and they would be within public view the entire time.

A skirt it was then; he'd find anything else strange anyway.

Now the question was, which skirt? This was about more than just Light; to be out in the crowds brought the possibility of being recognized. That hadn't happened yet, but it was only a matter of time. Her fans were located all over Japan and sooner or later one of them would see her during the course of a normal day. She couldn't afford to look anything less than perfect. She needed to meet, better yet surpass their expectations.

It was with the utmost care that she choose her outfit. In the end she ditched the idea of a skirt and choose a white sweater dress; it was short, but no shorter than any skirt she would have worn. Her father wouldn't like it of course, but fans would.

It would be paired with a belt and ankle boots. Simple enough.

One challenge down, one to go.

She really did want to find out what L thought of her, but to ask him would defeat the purpose.

He'd told her something about himself, did that mean anything? Had he expected her to understand? He'd worn an unusual expression when she asked about where he'd grown up, perhaps he hadn't thought anyone would piece together the clues he'd provided.

Certainly the task force wouldn't have. Matsuda had already moved onto speaking of his own childhood and no one else had been prepared to speak up.

Had that been another test? He must have known they wouldn't understand what he was saying, in fact he'd been about to deny Matsuda's request for memory sharing in the first place. Why had he changed his mind?

Haruka would have liked to think it was because she'd added her petition, but that was a dangerous thought and not necessarily true. Until he came forward with a more concrete confession she would make no assumptions. Besides, he'd not detailed the revelation. Then again, he hadn't said he never would.

She sighed. This was too confusing. Ryuzaki was too confusing. Everything about this situation was off the rails and there didn't seem to be any way to get back on track. What would happen when she left high school? Before that she'd be a legal adult. They couldn't keep her in the hotel then, but would she leave?

Her father was expecting that, she knew he was. He thought she'd move into an apartment of her own the day of her birthday, but was that what she wanted? Money wasn't going to be an issue and she was almost certain her allotment of the educational fund would be coming to her; even if it didn't, she'd saved more than enough to get into a decent place in a safe neighborhood.

Would L stop her? Did she want him to?

To be honest was to admit that she wanted to stay with him, but unless he would be honest too there was no reason for her to act on those feelings.

If he didn't try to stop her, if he didn't care that she left, her heart was going to be in pieces. It might serve her right. She'd been dumb enough to fall for him, fully aware of how emotionally incognizant he was. If he wasn't as invested in her as she was in him, she had no one to blame but herself.

" _Your feelings are not wholly unrequited."_

What did he know about her feelings? Even if Watari had spilled the beans, and he didn't seem like the type to do that, L hadn't heard anything from her. He had no idea what she was experiencing! It was so irresponsible of him to speak of things he knew nothing about. What if she'd lied to Watari? He'd be making a total fool of himself.

"World's best detective." The title had gone to his head. She wasn't some common criminal he could puzzle out by analyzing her behavior. Unlike the people he usually dealt with she didn't have an ulterior motive and he was probably attributing more to her actions than she put behind them.

What was he even thinking she felt? Did he realize that his entire statement hung on her being aware that he knew how she felt about him? _And that she_ _wasn't_?

He could think she hated him. His actions weren't those of someone who thought that way, but it was possible. He was weird! Who knew how he would react to hatred?

He could have been telling that he hated her. He could have been saying, "I like you too." He might have meant that he kind of liked her, but not as much as she liked him.

Again, he didn't really know how she felt so what he'd said meant nothing.

Ryuzaki was so conceited! He thought he knew what she was thinking and even if he was right how idiotic was it to act without finding out for sure first?

Those thoughts combined and propelled her from the bedroom to the living room where her father, Matsuda, and L remained.

"You!" she shouted, pointing at the source of her vexation and causing those in the room to jump in surprise. "Are clueless! You idiot! You don't know anything about anything and until you do don't talk to me!"

/~/~/~/~/

Soichiro was as concerned as any father could be about Haruka's aggravated statements. It seemed that he'd missed some crucial interaction between the head of the investigation and his eldest daughter and, though he hated to think it could be true, he had the frightening thought that it might have something to do with romantic inclinations.

He was aware of what L had said during that first meeting. Apparently Haruka had been partial to the idea of the detective and her enraged reaction proved the accusation true. The fact that she'd remained upset for so long had alleviated any fear he might have had of a resurfacing, but lately her annoyance had shifted. She didn't seem so much upset anymore as exasperated. She was annoyed by Ryuzaki, but not enough to hate him, not enough to curse at him and–

Had she just blushed?

"Uh, Chief? Do you need water or something? Maybe you should step outside? You look kind of red."

His eyes were darting between the two. L had not seemed to react, but something must have happened.

What had he just missed? What caused that faint pink tinge to touch her cheeks and why were her shorts so short? That wasn't the fashion was it? It was winter! What sense was there in wearing short shorts and–

Ryuzaki had been looking at her.

"Chief? I'm getting you a drink, okay? Just hold on a second!"

This was impossible. He had to be misreading the situation. Haruka was a minor and she had no interest in anyone, much less L. He was certainly not her type. She complained about him too often and he thought she could be Kira. He wouldn't involve himself with a potential criminal.

He was over thinking it; there was nothing to be concerned about.

"Here, Chief."

"Thank you, Matsui."

Haruka was leaving the room already. Surely he'd misinterpreted her expression, had misunderstood her actions. L hadn't actually looked at her, had he? Probably not. It was unlikely. In fact, the more he thought about it the less likely it seemed.

Still, there was a small part of him that worried. Haruka often took the unpredictable route and he could think of nothing more unexpected than finding that she was interested in Ryuzaki.

It was rare that Haruka failed to acquire what she wanted. If she was after L's attention he had no doubt she would try to get it, but his real fear lay in whether or not the detective would reciprocate. He was not someone Soichiro wanted Haruka in a relationship with. His line of work was too dangerous, too close to the edge of the law.

"Haruka."

She stopped, pivoted, and glared.

"Did I not just tell you–"

"Have your brother come here to pick you up on Sunday."

/~/~/~/~/

This couldn't end well.

Haruka paced back and forth in her bedroom. Light would be arriving at any minute only to be greeted by L who'd insisted that it was time for him to meet her twin.

What did he mean by it? Obviously he needed to meet Light at some point, to see if Kira would surface during a face-to-face meeting, but was there an ulterior motive?

Could he be using this as a signal to her that he was seriously going to pursue her?

"Gah!" She put her hands over her face as she fell backward onto the bed. "Too optimistic!"

Ryuzaki meeting her family. What an insane picture that brought to mind! Sayu would be accepting after a moment's hesitation, her mother bewildered. She could see it, see him sitting in that strange way in the living room. Sayu would comment on it, Sachiko would shush her, and L would explain that it heightened his mental capacity. All the while _she'd_ be red in the and face trying not to explode on him for being so unusual, while mentally berating herself for thinking him cute despite, or perhaps because of, his odd habits.

That wasn't happening today. No, today Light would meet L, or Ryuzaki, or whatever alternate identity the detective choose to use, and everything she'd worked for would be shot.

Had they met without her around she could have pretended to be unaware, played the innocent card when Light started questioning her, but there would be no chance of that now. She'd told him at school after being given the directive and his reaction had been less than stellar.

"At the _hotel_."

She'd cringed.

"You've been staying with this guy at a _hotel_? Is that what you're telling me right now? Dad left you with some guy–"

"And an older gentleman!"

"–at a _hotel_?!"

He was so pissed. Nothing she did calmed him; he'd turned away her advances and then refused to speak to her. Haruka had worried he'd cancel the date, but a text came Saturday night reaffirming the address.

She wanted to strangle L, but he claimed that his plans were going to be put into action and that he needed to meet Light to do it.

She had no idea what he was going to say, but depending on what Ryuzaki told Light her plans for the day might need to be put on hold. There was only so much he could take. An unexpected encounter with the man chasing Kira down was probably going to strain his patience to the breaking point.

At ten minutes to eleven she left the bedroom for the parlor to find L standing, stooped as ever, by the door.

She didn't want to be alone with him, but he would think her weak if she turned tail to hide.

Instead she took a seat in the chair he'd claimed as his own and tried to look nonchalant by putting in an earbud and turning up the volume on her MP3 player. One ear free to hear Light knock, the other end of the listening device left to hang so she could bombard Ryuzaki with passive-aggressive lyrics hinting at how she felt because she was tired of keeping it to herself, but there was little chance to talk to him about it without the possibility of being overheard.

It was time to pull out all the stops. She'd never been timid and all this sulking was growing old, so she chose to play what she thought was the most appropriate song possible: Crush, by Mandy Moore. As it happened this was also one of the few songs she could sing along with halfway decently.

Still, it was embarrassing and she couldn't help but close her eyes because the thought of L actually paying attention was too much to bear, but so was the idea of his ignoring her. The song was half finished when she found the courage to recite the lyrics, but she thought it better than cowardly keeping quiet.

"I got a crush on you, I hope you feel the way that I do. I get a rush when I'm with you. Ooo, I got a crush on you, a crush on you. Ooo, I wish I could tell somebody, but there's no one to talk to. Nobody knows I got a crush on you–"

When had she turned into such a teenager? Such a _girl_? She'd never felt so airheaded in all her life! This was such a dumb thing to do, but it seemed like the only option. He wasn't stupid, surely he understood something as direct as this; if not she might have to give up for good because she didn't know how much more her heart could take.

"You say everything that no one says, but I feel everything that you're afraid to feel. I will always want you, I will always love you- I got a crush on you, I hope you feel the way that I do. I get a rush when I'm with you. Ooo, I got a crush on you, a crush on you."

Her eyes popped open when she felt a finger touch her cheek. A poke? No, it was more of a stroke and it was _L_ standing over her, his eyes as empty as ever, but what was he doing leaning closer? He couldn't be about to–

And then he did.

/~/~/~/~/

He was not unaware of her presence, he never had been, and at this point it would have been impossible to mistake her behavior for anything else.

She was clearly attempting to bother him into leaving his post so he would give up on his introduction to Light.

She was sitting in his chair, perhaps in a show of defiance or maybe, he could hardly think it, possession, but that upbeat American pop-song was incredibly annoying! Was she trying to drive him to the mad house?

He didn't place any significance behind the music until Haruka started singing along, not very well he noted, midway through.

" _I will always want you, I will always love you- I got a crush on you, I hope you feel the way that I do."_

L was sure that he'd never been so shocked by a revelation as he was this one and he acted on it immediately.

He'd known that her sensitivity remained, but what was that? Talk of forever. _I will always want you, I will always love you_.

He stood over her, quickly fighting a silent internal debate. Did she know what she was saying? Of course she did. What was the purpose of this? It was easier to use words that had already been spoken than to say something like that on her own. It was immature to regulate her thoughts to the words of a song, but if she thought it was an adequate expression of her feelings then who was he to question her?

Ryuzaki hadn't meant to touch her face, it was an involuntary action, but then he'd already done it and he didn't want to take it back. So, rather than stepping away when her eyes opened, he leaned down and pressed his mouth to hers.

He didn't know what he'd expected to come of kissing Haruka, if anything he supposed she might push him back in surprise; instead, though she trembled lightly, her lips moved against his own and he didn't think he'd ever experienced something so pleasant.

Well, perhaps that wasn't exactly the word for it, but nothing else was coming to mind and it was sufficient. At least it was, until her hands moved into his hair and she pushed her tongue into his mouth.

He wasn't sure what to do about that, but apparently reciprocation was a preprogramed response because without conscious permission he'd become entangled and suddenly something that had once seemed disgusting and unhygienic was perfectly perfect.

/~/~/~/~/

Yagami, Light was ticked to say the least. Haruka had confessed that her living situation was not all he'd been led to believe it was. She wasn't staying with _some member_ of the Kira Task Force, she was hotel hoping with L! She'd intimated that she was with L before, but this was more than he'd expected.

She swore she knew nothing much about who L was, that he was called Ryuzaki by the police and herself, that she had no knowledge of any secret information, but how could he believe her?

It would have been best to kill her. He should have. He had no idea what kind of dealings she might have had with L, how the detective might have poisoned her mind against Kira and yet she lived.

It was as he'd feared. He was incapable of killing Haruka.

The only course of action now was to get her away from L's influence, but their father had been fine with her staying in a hotel with the man, so what chance did he have of convincing Soichiro that Haruka would be better off at home?

He was taking her out that morning. Eleven o'clock was fast approaching and he was outside the hotel she claimed to be staying in. Should he go to the specified floor, to the indicated room number, and find that she wasn't there he could hardly be held responsible for any actions he may take.

Ryuk whistled. "Wow. Some hotel! She's livin' it up, huh?"

That was not helpful.

/~/~/~/~/

She was kissing Ryuzaki. Okay, heading toward second base more like, but after wanting to be with him for so long it was almost indescribable.

Had it really only been a few weeks? It felt like months! But, no. It was just the start of February.

Once they'd set in the hormones had really kicked her in the ass. The mystery of Teenage Girl Syndrome had finally been solved; she still couldn't fully comprehend the desperation behind some of the lengths her classmates were willing to go to find a relationship, but at least she understood wanting to be with someone in particular.

Reality settled hard when the knock sounded on the door.

Light had arrived.

 **Other Facts**

No one knows what happens to the soul of a Shinigami who has given their life for that of a human. Most speculate it is destroyed entirely.


	11. Revealing Revelations

_Chapter 11_

 _Revealing Revelations_

Haruka wondered if this meeting could be more awkward.

"Hello Yagami, Light my name is Ryuga, Hideki. I'm dating your sister."

Ah yes, it could get worse and L had made sure that it did.

She couldn't read the look on Light's face, his acting skills were top-notch, but she suspected a murderous whirlwind of emotions was swirling behind the mask.

"That's not true!" she spoke before he could lose his composure, grabbed his arm. This was not the moment to see Kira unmasked. "He's Ryuzaki and he's _weird_. And a liar."

It seemed that was enough to put Light into the character of the affectionate sibling. He patted her head with a laugh. "Well, that was sudden. I guess you'll have news like that someday though. I should prepare myself." Prepare himself to kill whoever was fool enough to think they could be deserving of Haruka. Surely this man's name wasn't in common with the pop idol, but even if it was, and he wrote it in the Death Note, there was a chance he'd kill the superstar.

"You call me Ryuzaki, Haruka, but to your brother I am Ryuga. At least for now. You may also think of me as L, but please don't use that name."

A tiny widening of the eyes, he couldn't hide it. Was this really L? He was a strange figure. Round-shouldered as if he had some sort of deformity and barefooted. Whatever the case he'd called his sister by name and she hadn't–

"Who said you could call me by name?!"

He very nearly sighed in relief; she didn't seem interested.

The urge to kiss her was repressed and in the larger scheme of things Haruka's non-relationship with Ryuga was hardly important. This threw up a solid barrier. He'd never dreamed that L would introduce himself! Even if this was L, even if he'd just given his real name, to kill him would be like signing his own death warrant. Be this some stand-in or not this person would have to live. The Shinigami Eye Deal was worthless. If this guy died Light would be, without question, the number one suspect and Haruka high on the list as well.

This was an unwanted development; L had claimed victory this round. To act out would only make him seem suspicious.

"It's nice meeting you, Ryuga," he held out his hand in way of greeting, but it was ignored.

"I told you he's weird," Haruka supplied an explanation as the offer was withdrawn. "A real freak."

"That's not a nice thing to say," though he agreed. "Different isn't bad, Haruka." An older brother scolding his little sister. It was an easy role, but not one he enjoyed. "Anyway I think we should get going. It was—" his parting words were cut off as Haruka pulled him from the threshold and closed the door behind them.

It was several seconds before he felt he could ask her to clarify without sounding suspiciously angry. They were within the elevator, being watched on a closed circuit television system he had no doubt, when Light questioned her on his most pressing concern.

"So, was that really L?"

Haruka had to hand it to him, he kept his character well. Even now, though she knew he must be burning inside, wanting to demand answers, he played it cool. Interested, but not _too_ interested.

"I would say so."

"You're not sure?"

"I don't know how I could be. I mean, I really do think he is, but I can't exactly prove it. He's definitely a detective and definitely one of those people on the line between genius and insanity."

"And Dad believes he is."

More of a statement, but she answered in the affirmative anyway. "He does."

They exited the lift, drew eyes in the lobby and when they stepped into the sunlight more than one person stopped to watch as Light put an arm around her shoulders. An innocent gesture, easily perceived as otherwise; she wondered which he trying to convey. Was this a poorly concealed show of ownership?

"Light," she called his attention. "I'm really not dating Ryuzaki. I don't know why he said that." Another partial lie. She could guess why he'd told Light, but it was true that she didn't think of their relationship as 'dating'. L still hadn't told her what he was feeling. Kissing her was an unmistakable clue, but she wasn't sure that she could be happy about it.

"I know." His smile was false.

She let the subject drop. Nothing she said at this point would be enough to convince him; he was too agitated by the whole exchange.

It was a very good thing she didn't know L's real name. Light might have tried to coerce it out of her, would then find himself forced to kill her when she refused. Even if he asked her now, though she could honestly say she didn't know, he might feel compelled to end her.

Kira couldn't be trusted. Light wanted her, she knew he did, but if she became too much of a liability she didn't doubt that he would discard her. The moment his suspicions outweighed his lust was the moment Kira would strike and there was no telling when that would happen.

Haruka turned on the waterworks. She wasn't as good a performer as Light, but she could at least try to pull on whatever heartstrings he had left; maybe buy herself some time and sympathy.

With teary eyes she stopped walking, forcing him to stop as well. When he rounded on her, prepared to question the sudden halt, she wrapped her arms around his middle and said, "I'm sorry, Onii-chan." A false apology for not being able to be home blended into a real apology for failing to fix the underlying problem.

She still wanted things to go back to the way they'd been before. Why could they not be a happy family? Was there really no way to change the past? Light was Kira, she knew in her heart that it was true, but there remained an inexpressible sense of injustice deep within her psyche. He hadn't turned into a monster under his own power and if she could find and destroy the source of that power maybe she could have Light back.

It was a foolish wish, she acknowledged that, but she wanted it all the same.

She wanted so badly to believe the best in him when he hugged her back, saying that she hadn't done anything for him to forgive, but the too tight hold betrayed his real intentions. He was still upset and he still wanted her in all the wrong ways.

The curious gazes of onlookers were ignored and the siblings continued on their way through downtown Tokyo, both acutely aware that they were subject to lingering stares.

Haruka supposed it made sense. They'd always drawn eyes when they went out together. When they were small they'd garnered pats on the head and pinched cheeks, but now they were too old to be approached by strangers so people settled for whispering and pointing.

They couldn't think they were being discreet, could they? Like she didn't see those girls up ahead snapping photos with their cell phones.

"People are really rude," she muttered.

"I thought you liked having your picture taken." Sarcastic, mocking. He was still against the modeling.

"...You're rude too."

"Only to you."

That was true. He'd never say something like that to anyone else, not yet at least. She imagined Kira thought in that tone all the time, looked down his nose at all the little people, but Light couldn't afford to conduct himself that way. He loved to present that image of perfection. No matter the situation immaculate Light wouldn't conduct himself impolitely.

He never would have behaved that way toward her either; it severed as a reminder that the brother she'd once known was gone. In the past Light had been nothing but kind to and concerned for his family. This new normal was troubling.

She'd scrapped the idea of bringing up Kira's numerous miscalculations and now she needed something different to talk to him about, but the issue was put on hold when, for the first time, she was called on to give an autograph.

"Um, excuse me, but you're Ha-Haruka-chan, right?"

Three girls, wide-eyed and Sayu's age or a bit younger, approached the pair cautiously.

She looked to Light quickly, saw the blank mask take it's place on his face, and then addressed the children.

"I am. It's nice to meet you–"

"Kyoko!"

"Rei!"

"Tomo!"

Bubbly pre-teens, their confidence growing when she didn't shoot their approach down, who asked her to sign a magazine they'd bought, the one she'd been featured in with Amane. They departed in high spirits, arguing over who would get to keep the signature, when she called to them and offered to sign two more pages.

Their excitement was unrestrained; exploding in squeals and giggles they pledged undying support for her career and as they walked away each was already on her phone calling friends to brag.

She and Light entered a cafe a few paces away, some new trendy place that sold deserts and foreign coffees. Orders in hand they moved to the sit on the patio. It was too early for the lunch crowd and the seating area was deserted but for the two of them.

"Aren't you special."

The level of resentment in his voice was surprising, his eyes had that hint of red. "Wow. Bitter? Don't be jealous, you're still number one to me," she paused, then added, "and probably Sayu." His lack of response worried her. "It's good for me to be loved by them." Here was the opportunity to start on the Kira talk; though she'd put those plans aside the perfect chance had presented itself. "Better than what Kira's doing."

His sigh sounded exasperated. "What do you mean?"

"Just think about it. To be loved or feared? Fear is the easy route. It's not too hard to upset or frighten people into following someone, but having them do it out of love? That bond is much stronger. People can overcome fear. To have someone who is truly devoted is special. Kira doesn't understand that. Out of all the supporters how many only stand on his side out of fear?"

"I don't see why that would matter to Kira." He observed her over the rim of his coffee cup, wondered why she'd decided to speak of this.

"Oh, it probably doesn't," Haruka waved her hand. "But that just goes to show how short-sighted Kira is. Eventually people will rise against each other, killing one another for not supporting Kira enough and such. All I can see is chaos the world over. Human nature isn't so easily broken and to try and use fear to do it? Ha! Kira failed before he started."

Light bristled. What was she talking about? Insolent. Brat. What did she know of human nature? He was handing down justice! Kira was followed because people were grateful to be able to live in a safe world.

"See, I've thought about this," she continued. "I don't think I'm so different from Kira, not really. I want to change the world too."

"Do you? And how does being a model advance that goal?"

He was openly taunting her, but she wouldn't be forced off the soapbox just because he didn't like hearing what she had to say; instead she scoffed. "Did you not see those girls? They'll do anything I say at this point! Not because they're afraid of me, but because they admire me. Sayu is the same way with celebrities. The problem is that all those dolts on screen follow the money and waste their influence. The only thing people need is someone to look up to and they'll happily be lead along like a dog on a leash." She sat back, crossed one leg over the other. "It's better for them to follow me than the idols of today, better to follow me than Kira. I won't led them to violence and depravity."

/~/~/~/~/

The date went downhill from there. Light barely said a word to her for the rest of the day and the three hours they spent together were full of subtle glares and elbow jabs.

Ryuk was obnoxiously amused by Haruka's declaration, wouldn't stop talking about it.

"She might be smarter than you, Light! It's too bad _she_ didn't pick up the Note. Now that would have been interesting! Maybe someone else will drop one."

Wanting to stand against Kira? To rise above him? Who did she think she was?

"Is this your first 'lovers-fight'?" Laughter. "What a thing to argue over! Which Yagami twin can rule the world better, Light or Haruka?"

Though he detested the way she spoke of Kira, and found fault with her fear verses love statement, she'd made a logical argument. There would undoubtedly be those who took their support too far and they would have to be dealt with. Even so, he didn't see the point in looking as far ahead as that. There were more pressing concerns; like the gothic-lolita blond who kept shooting looks his way as she approached.

"Haruka-chan!"

"Misa-san?"

"Ah, it's so great to see you again! Isn't it crazy how two people with so much in common can randomly run into each other?"

"Um," Haruka noted that Amane didn't seem to be speaking to her, rather her eyes were on the space above her companion's head. Strange. "Yeah, I suppose it is..." She chanced a glance at Light. His face was stony. "This is my brother, Light."

"Nice to meet you, Yagami, Light!" Misa held out her hand with an eager smile.

His greeting was reluctant, forced. Haruka didn't think he was even trying to hide his displeasure.

"So, uh, sorry Misa, but we were just headed back and–"

"No problem, no problem! I just wanted to say 'Hi' to my most favorite person in the whole world! See you soon!" And with that she was off, crossing the street and waving goodbye as she went.

Light offered no explanation for his ill-mannered behavior, though it hadn't seemed to upset Misa, and Haruka didn't ask. She wouldn't get the truth from him and there was no point in listening to him spin stories; what she needed to do was remember as much about that meeting as possible.

Misa had hardly looked at her. She'd focused all her attention on Light; that, in itself, wasn't surprising. Many women behaved that way around her brother, but the way Misa spoke suggested she was using some kind of code language, that she was trying to convey something to Light. Her statements could have been made to Haruka, they made sense in context and if she'd been unobservant she would have missed the implications, but Misa had not been speaking to her.

 _...two people with so much in common_? What did Misa have in common with a boy she'd just met? She knew nothing about him. Unless Amane was referring to their individual relationships with Haruka, but that didn't measure up.

Her ... _most favorite person in the_ _whole_ _world_? Haruka didn't think she fit that description. Who was Misa's favorite person?

There was research to be done so she made no argument when Light declined to see her to the hotel room. They parted on the sidewalk with distant words.

Indoors once again Haruka moved into the elevator and spoke her question aloud.

"Who is Amane, Misa's favorite person?"

/~/~/~/~/

"She's a Kira supporter."

Ryuzaki opened the door with that impossible answer.

"What? Misa is?"

"Amane was involved in a murder several years ago, her parents were both killed. Kira did away with the criminal."

Who could have guessed that kind of thing was in the peppy model's past? She made no indication of having such a depressing background. She acted so happy, was she really hiding deep wounds?

"I guess it's no wonder then, but she called Light her 'most favorite person in the world'."

"Now that is interesting." He shuffled away and she made to pass, but he took hold of her wrist. "However, I think there is something even more fascinating than Amane's interest in your brother."

She didn't want to have this conversation. She'd almost forgotten that anything had happened between them. With Light's ire and Misa's odd words, were there not enough things to be looking into? Didn't he have something better to do?

It was unlike her to employ avoidance techniques, to hide from a problem didn't make it disappear, but she wasn't in the mood to listen to L try and deconstruct the situation. This wasn't something they should have to talk about, was it? Weren't things like this best left to grow naturally?

She couldn't remember hearing her classmates ever speak of discussing their relationships with their significant others. Everything spiraled on it's own axis. If a problem ever arose that was then things were talked over. That was the norm.

Somehow she didn't think a relationship with L would be considered normal by her friends no matter how hard she tried to make him behave like an average person.

Haruka put a hold on those when she realized she'd been towed to a room she had never been allowed inside before. It was bare save a laptop computer and microphone that sat on the floor in the center of the room; the lights were turned off. On the screen she saw the members of the task force, who appeared to be within the station, looking over cases related to Kira she assumed.

She declined to sit, watched as he knelt in front of the screen and pulled up an audio file.

"You said some intriguing things to your brother about Kira."

It was a moment before his words took root. "Wait. How do you kn–" she broke off, put her hands to her hair, looked at the back of her dress and turned on the spot. "You bugged me!? Where is it?!"

"The belt."

" _Why_? You could have told me!"

"No, your speech wouldn't have been as natural had you been aware in advance."

"When. When did you wire it?" She'd had the horrible thought, the terrible idea, that he might have done it that morning. "Ryuzaki, tell me when this was bugged."

"Yesterday."

She sat then, her back pressed against his, and sighed in relief.

"What would you have done," he asked, "If it had happened today?"

"I would have wrung your neck. I would have broken your fingers. I would have knocked you out, restrained you, waited for you wake up and then cut off your lips."

"Charming." That might have been the ultimate betrayal in her eyes. L couldn't help but feel that he'd sidestepped a landmine. "I don't doubt your sincerity."

She fell silent and he resisted turning to look at her. It was strange, having someone in this room with him, even stranger to be sitting back-to-back with that someone. Strange, but not unpleasant. Soft curls tickled the back of his neck as he considered their position.

To be involved with Haruka brought the possibility of serious complications, a few had the potential to be deadly. He put the chances of loosing his life over this at the eight percent mark and the most likely of those deaths resulted from her father becoming aware of the relationship.

Ryuzaki had put the meeting of the task force off until that evening; there was little to go over and he'd needed time to think. Watari was fulfilling his role as stand-in once more. They were alone.

Surely there was something that needed to be said, they couldn't jump head-first into a pool of romance. Spontaneity was dangerous, things needed to be planned and thought over. Kissing her that morning had been a mistake, a move he hadn't meant to make. He would have to regain control of the situation.

"What happened this morning cannot happen again." He felt her stiffen and as she rocketed to her feet grabbed her hand before she could storm out of the room. "It would be in our best interest if you could learn to listen before making judgments."

"Yeah? Well, it would be in our best interest if you would just say what you mean instead of being cryptic!" Yes, she did recognize that he'd said 'in _our_ best interest' and it did give her hope, but how could he say something like that and not expect a bad reaction? "You are so dense, L! You can't just– just say things that way!"

"In what way?"

She sighed heavily. This required explanation?

"Like before. When you came to my door and said, 'Your feelings are not wholly unrequited'. You can't just say that! How would I know what you mean?!"

"I assumed–"

"Exactly! You assumed. So you were right, and I'll bet it never even occurred to you that you could be wrong either, but you could have been. And anyway this isn't all about you. For all I knew you thought I kind of hated you. You could have been saying that you hated me too!"

"But I wasn't."

"No, you weren't, but I didn't know that."

L understood what she said, realized now that his statements could have been misconstrued, but Haruka wasn't stupid. She hadn't seriously thought he might hate her, that was an emotional, irrational reaction likely born from insecurities. Irrational insecurities.

Irrational.

This was all irrational. What reason did he have to hold her hand this way? Why had she not pulled away yet and why did he find himself hoping that she never would? She'd not been kind or sweet or even-tempered. She was rude, bratty and too young. Her father would kill him if he found out about this in the wrong way.

He had no good reason to be with Haruka.

Except she liked him.

And he liked her too.

"From now on," Haruka continued. "You have to say what you mean clearly the first time! If that's even feasible and I'm not sure it is because you've been such a weirdo for so long that at this point it might be impossible for you to–!"

She wanted him to be direct. Once he'd pulled her down to eye level and, though he hadn't meant to, put his unoccupied hand to her cheek he said, "I like you."

Haruka avoided his eyes as she asked, "Just 'like'?"

"No."

"Then what else because I just told you to say what you mean, Ryuzaki! I'm a very straightforward person and–,"

"I know."

"– and I didn't think you were dumb, but it seems like this isn't making sense to you and stop interrupting me!"

"I don't know what else." He was not ashamed to admit that he was without a proper explanation. "It isn't something I can explain," he paused and then added, "Yet." He would endeavor to find an appropriate way of expressing himself.

He was still holding her hand and, for the life of her, Haruka couldn't _not_ be happy about it. She tried to tell herself it was nothing much, that plenty of people held hands, but this was... Different. It was different because it was happening to _her_ and _L was holding her hand_.

"What I was saying," he said, "is what happened this morning can't happen in that way again."

"Oh." She blinked. "Well, fine I agree with that, but–,"

He kissed her.

And he was still holding her hand.

/~/~/~/~/

"Ah, Yagami, Light," Misa sighed as she sat on her bed. "I only met him this morning, but I just know we're meant to be together forever!"

Rem looked on in silence.

"I know he has a Death Note and I can tell that he's Kira! He has that aura, the strong, beautiful aura of a man who is bringing justice to this world. Don't you think so, Rem?"

The addressed answered with a warning, "Misa, I would be wary of Yagami, Light if I was you."

"I know you worry about me, Rem, but you don't have to! It's okay. My life is extra long thanks to that other Shinigami, the one you told me about, so the eye deal was no big thing. Light hasn't made the deal so he doesn't know I have a Death Note too, but Kira will be so glad when he finds out! Misa can help him and I'll start right away."

Rem was not appeased by Misa's lighthearted attitude, in fact it only served to increase the shinigami's concern. The blond had her head in the clouds, her mind imagining romantic scenarios, but Rem did not trust Yagami, Light. Contrary to what Misa saw through her rose-colored gaze Rem identified the boy as someone unworthy of trust. He had been cold toward Misa during that meeting, impolite even. Too stiff. Too indifferent.

It would do no good to tell Misa these things. Rem was well aware of her temperament; she wouldn't hear a word against him now. The only thing Rem could do was stand between Misa and Light, protecting Misa at all costs against that boy and his soulless eyes.

 **Other Facts**

The Shinigami do not remember where they were before they entered the Shinigami Realm, however they are aware that they haven't always been there.


	12. Amane's Assault

_Chapter 12_

 _Amane's Assault_

 **Disclaimer: If 'Marker Magazine' is real I don't own it.**

 _ **A/N: The L vs Kira relationship explained in musical form: Boundless by Aero Chord (find it on YouTube. Monstercat 019- Endeavour).**_

Amane, Misa was in a rapturous state. Her plan was moving full-speed ahead. Four tapes sent to Sakura TV station, four tapes that were sure to call the attention of Yagami, Light the man she knew was Kira. The man she was in love with. He'd have to make contact with her after this!

Light would be so glad to have someone else on his side, someone like her. She would do anything, _anything_ for Light. Not only had he ended the life of the horrible, evil, vile trash that had taken her parents lives, but he'd done so much for the world.

"And he's so hot!" she squealed into a pillow.

If they got married she would be sisters with Haruka and because she'd done extensive research she knew she'd be gaining another sister as well. She'd always wanted a younger sister, someone to play with and share fashion advice with. When she married Light she would have two! Two bridesmaids to pick out dresses for, two weddings to go to in the future, two people to take on Girls Only vacations...

"Two aunts for our babies!"

Rem watched in silence. Misa would appreciate nothing the shinigami had to say, had ignored all warnings, and now her lifespan had dropped dramatically. If the natural course was followed Misa had no hope of meeting her goals with anyone at all, much less Yagami, Light.

Misa's death would be averted at the cost of Rem's own life, but it was a price the shinigami was more than willing to pay.

"I can hardly wait for everything to start!"

/~/~/~/~/

Hand holding.

It had always seemed like such a foolish thing, something her friends giggled over and bragged about.

" _We held hands the whole time!"_

Who cared about that? What was the significance? Haruka had never understood their exaggerated excitement over the act. Even now, though it made her happy, she couldn't see why it was regarded as a milestone.

Perhaps it was because the circumstances were different. She had no opportunity to hold Ryuzaki's hand in public and maybe that was a crucial piece of the puzzle?

She snorted at the thought of being seen with L, in any capacity, by the populace. What an odd pair they would make! She could hardly imagine it, walking down the street and holding his hand. Where she and Light drew admiration, she and L would draw confusion. How could they not? They didn't match.

Still, she wasn't much bothered by the idea and spent little time thinking of it. There was no purpose to dwelling on such an insignificant action, especially when she couldn't see it happening any time soon.

Regardless she couldn't stop smiling about it and had locked herself away in her room to keep the others from seeing her in such an unnatural state. Matsuda would undoubtedly comment, calling the attention of her father and that was the last thing she needed.

Her school books were her only source of entertainment and she found comfort in the unbiased, cold, hard facts contained within. Arithmetic was difficult, English a fond struggle. Other subjects were met with disinterest, but the end of high school was just around the corner and she didn't want to leave with poor scores. Modeling career notwithstanding, she hoped to have more to her name than a pretty face.

Haruka had never cared much for school except to the extent that it gave her the opportunity to endear herself to others. Being surrounded by people who admired her, who sought her attention, was what she'd always wanted.

From the time she was young she'd known that she liked having people do things for her, that she wanted them to follow her directions. She supposed most children were like that, most adults as well, but not many had the ability to convince others to comply their whims.

A natural trait?, she wondered. She couldn't think of a time when she'd _tried_ to make others do as she bid, it just seemed to happen. Even in elementary school it had been too easy to become the center of the classroom; girls were always sharing possessions with her, friendship bracelets and things like that, while the boys poked fun at her from afar. That hadn't been something she wanted, but she'd been told by a young teacher that boys behaved that way toward girls they liked and she'd wielded that knowledge against rude children of the opposite sex like a weapon.

In the end it appeared as if this was all fate.

She did believe in fate. There were too many 'coincidences' in life for her to think that everything was just one big accident. She'd been born for a reason, to her family for a reason and she knew that Light was Kira for a reason. Even his actions had a purpose, though she couldn't think what it was and she accepted that she might never know.

At the very least it had led to her meeting L.

"A fated meeting." It was a romantic notion, the kind of thing she tended to dismiss as one of those 'Teenage Girl Syndrome' symptoms, but what other explanation was there? Had Kira not popped onto the scene she wouldn't have even known L existed. If Light wasn't the number one suspect she wouldn't have been on Ryuzaki's radar.

She didn't blame fate for unfortunate circumstances, people made their choices and dealt with the consequences, but she did feel that life happened the way it happened because that was the way it was going to happen.

A decision could be made, an innocuous one, that lead to the loss of someone's life and people would call it an untimely death, but not Haruka. How many things needed to come together for that moment to happen? Millions upon millions of moments, so many actions made by people the world over, and then a death. Or a life. A fight. Love.

"Love?" She did love L; lying to herself would do no good. Honestly she'd never thought that she would feel this way, she couldn't even be genuinely happy in the presence of most, but Ryuzaki's strangeness had reeled her in before she had a chance to cut the line.

He wasn't people. People were easy to understand. People made the same mistakes time and again. People were boring. People were followers. People were foolish. People were stupid.

L wasn't like that and she'd only ever known one other person who managed to stand outside her estimation of the population.

Unfortunately that person was a mass murderer and her older brother, which had put Light out of the running for one-true-love, but L was neither of those things; he'd won the position without trying.

There remained, however, one glaring uncertainty in the relationship she was pursuing:

Ryuzaki had not said that he loved her. In fact he'd informed her that he didn't know how to explain what he felt. Perhaps that was a point in the direction of love, but maybe not. Being unable to talk about his feelings seemed like a very _L_ thing so it probably didn't mean much one way or the other, but it was still a source of some anxiety.

What if she'd fallen too hard? What if he didn't feel the same?

Her school books were abandoned as she moved toward the door and swiped her cardkey off the dresser.

This hotel had a special room for those on the upper floors; she'd never gone before but had seen it in a brochure, with a television, juice bar and finger foods. It was time to explore.

Prior to this she'd never had much interest in the places she stayed, but now she needed to keep away from L while others were around and this was as good a distraction as any.

Haruka paused with her hand on the knob, doubled back into the room, and made a call to the hotel's spa.

/~/~/~/~/

MP3 player and room key in hand she intended to leave without speaking a word, but her father's call for an explanation forced her to give a rundown of her plan.

"There's a spa here and I'm going to use it."

No further objection came and she left the task force members to their discouraging meeting.

Frustration seemed to be the predominate emotion. Everything was frustrating. There was little to go on, few things to discuss, and yet Ryuzaki remained as calm as ever. Soichiro could not grasp the detective's ability to detach from the situation; how could L sit there eating cake when six more criminals had been found dead just the day before?

Even so he didn't feel he had the authority to take issue with Ryuzaki's mannerisms. If not for him the Japanese Police wouldn't have gotten as far as they had on the Kira case. With a single television broadcast he'd discerned that Kira was located in the Kanto region of Japan, had proved the existence of the possibly psychic killer. He was their only real hope of winning this battle.

Strange though he was, L was perhaps the only person on the planet who could stand against Kira. Without his talent the Task Force would have disbanded long ago.

Now Ryuzaki, Matsuda and himself were left to discuss the few details they had.

"What do you think it means? 'L, do you know? God's of death love apples.' What does that have to do with anything?" Matsuda asked.

"It could be allegory, something symbolic. Kira may be telling me that he views himself as a god and apples are associated with the gain of forbidden knowledge. Perhaps Kira is alluding to his ability to kill in such an impossible way, saying that he has attained some kind of special power. Or he could be stating a fact. Shinigami might love apples. Of course that assumes that shinigami are real."

"Well, that is impossible."

"I would have thought it impossible to kill a man from a distance, at any time, with only the knowledge of his name and face, Asahi-san. However I no longer do. At this point I don't think it wise to assume anything is impossible."

"Hmm."

"It still seems crazy though... I guess I just can't wrap my head around it."

"It's rather easy to do if you can discard preconceived notions of what is and is not possible."

Matsuda's blank look was answer enough to his ability to see beyond his personal sphere of experience.

"In any case even if shinigami are real and among us it does not change our objective. Kira must be stopped. Yagami, Light remains the top suspect," the indignant frown on Soichiro's face went unheeded. "However I think his assistance could be useful. Not only to observe him more closely, but his observational skills could be an asset." In the event that the Yagami boy was Kira this offer would surely throw him off balance, just as their first meeting had; the teen had been so upset that his entire 'date' with Haruka would have been little more than a waste of time had she not broached the subject of Kira's mistakes.

Yes, that was interesting. She was more forward thinking than Light, perhaps she had a better understanding of human nature as well. Kira was childish in ways Haruka was not. Too idealistic for his own good and now egocentric on top of that.

"Ryuzaki I find it hard to accept that you still suspect Light of being Kira, but I remain sure of his innocence. In any case I don't think he would refuse the offer and if it will help clear his name I'll bring up the subject."

"Thank you, Asahi-san. I'm sure everything will turn out for the best."

/~/~/~/~/

"Hey, Light. You know–," he broke off, began to laugh. "Never mind."

This was getting better by the day! Why ruin it with a tip off? Instead Ryuk guffawed, thought of that date and the girl with the shinigami. She'd definitely made the eye deal and _she knew_.

His laughter doubled at the thought. Meanwhile here was Light, totally unaware! He was pissed about the things his sister had said, had no idea he'd been found out. What was coming next? He could hardly stand to wait!

"Ryuk that is very annoying."

The irate statement did little to calm his unwanted companion and Light ran a hand through his hair in agitation. Haruka's words, recent and those from weeks ago, haunted him. It was impossible. She couldn't be right.

How long had she cared about Kira? Why bring that up? She'd obviously been more interested in the subject than he realized and knowing what he did now, that she was close to L, made the situation seem all the more suspicious.

Dangerous.

What else did she know? What else had she thought of? Was she digging for information now, trying to find what he desperately needed to keep hidden?

He'd thought having her on the inside could be a good thing, but at the moment all he wanted was for her to leave the presence of the detective. The further she was from L the better.

"Poisoning her mind..." Very likely. Telling her lies about Kira, calling his noble work evil.

And yet she'd seen his end, had seen him lose to L. What was the point of this if his toil was for nothing? He'd made leaps and bounds toward cleansing the world! The crime rate had dropped to an incredible, unprecedented low. Was it all destined to be undone?

A cruel trick of fate that would be. To allow the human race to come so close to perfection and then rip away their only hope.

He'd spent many hours thinking of it, trying to keep the sense of foreboding at bay, but could find no solution. He had no idea which actions in particular led to that outcome. The future may have already been changed and he would have no way of knowing. Unless Haruka had another insight his hands were tied.

The unexpected ring of his cell phone jarred him from his thoughts.

"Dad?" he muttered as he looked to the caller identification. It was very strange to receive a call from his father at all, much less on a cell phone at this time of night. It was getting late. He answered, his voice in perfect imitation of the kind, concerned son his parents thought he was.

"Ryuzaki would like for you to join the Task Force."

Of course he answered in the affirmative, refrained from smashing the phone against the wall as he hung up, and kept his seething anger hidden from the rest of the household by digging his nails into the palms of his hands instead of shouting in frustration.

L! That bastard! What sort of crap was this? Clearly a trap, something to trip him up and dammit it had worked!

He'd always intended to find a way into the Task Force, but on his own terms. Not L's! He had no choice but to accept, it would be suspicious for him to decline after all the things he'd said to Soichiro about his commitment to executing Kira.

How many other surprises did L have prepared for him and how could be plan against them?

"Dammit!" he hissed. He was falling behind in this game; L was already pulling into the lead and Haruka had seen his death.

"Huh? Ah. That's interesting. Sudden drop."

Ryuk's comment broke through Light's haze of fury and his eyes flashed red. He tried to sound unconcerned as he asked, "People's lifespans, do they stay the same throughout their lives?"

"Nah. They can change... Not sure why it would matter. Everyone dies!" His laughter returned.

 _Sudden drop_.

/~/~/~/~/

Light was going to become an official member of the Kira Task Force. She badly wanted to throw a fit over the revelation, but could think of no reasonable explanation for a tantrum without letting her father know that Light was the only person in the world she thought capable of being Kira.

That was the second-to-last thing she wanted him to know.

There was nothing she could say to dissuade Soichiro on this front; it was better to act as though she didn't care.

"Whatever."

"I think it's really great!" Matsuda enthused. "Light's very intelligent and talented, I'm sure he'll be a valuable addition to the team."

Haruka refrained from rolling her eyes at his eager attitude. Matsuda, Touta was forever over energetic. Maybe it was a product of youth, but after having been on this side of the Kira investigation she would have thought he'd acquire a more reserved posture. In a way she envied him; nothing kept Matsuda in low spirits for long and he was always optimistic. Though he was also rather dense, she liked him. His personality could be helpful and he'd cleared the air many times after L's unsympathetic comments made everyone else uncomfortable.

"Yes, Light-san will doubtlessly be of great help to us. Our first meeting was rather strained, but I think we can overcome that. We will, after all, be fighting toward the same goal. The capture and execution of Kira remains our top priority."

This time she _did_ roll her eyes. 'Strained' was an understatement. Three days after that date and he was still acting standoffish and cold. School friends had called her out on their lack of interaction; she'd brushed it off as a typical sibling fight, but they were all eager to see the two getting along again.

"I wanted to invite you both to my family's restaurant!" Minna had huffed and demanded, "Haruka! Make up with Light!"

She wasn't going to apologize, but it didn't make sense to stay upset either. Considering that they would soon be in each others company more often it was in everyone's best interests that they move beyond their issues.

She wouldn't be returning to the hotel directly after school on Thursday, but Light would be participating in his first meeting with the Task Force. They had to find some measure of reconciliation before tomorrow evening.

"So, Haruka-chan," Matsuda called her attention. "How was your relaxation time?"

For a moment her mind went blank; thoughts of Light had the tendency to sweep all others out of their path. "Ah, you mean just now? It was _fantastic_. Thank you for asking!" Another distraction provided by Touta. "As you can see I had my nails painted and–,"

"As fascinating as that is, Asahi-san," L commandeered the conversation, ignored her sounds of irritation. "I think it best that they get going. Asahi-san you will need to debrief Light before the meeting tomorrow, I would suggest doing so tonight. Matsui please go to the police headquarters and inform the others of our plans."

His directions were followed without argument and formalities were exchanged without ceremony. He was left to the company of Haruka who, though she did seem inclined to remain his presence as she laid across the couch, did not to address him.

Observation proved useless. He could not find a logical reason for their unlikely pairing and they'd yet to formally define what that paring was. He supposed 'dating' was an approximately equivalent and socially acceptable term for whatever it was, but it felt inadequate and almost wholly incorrect.

He wasn't _dating_ Haruka. They were just together and that was strange enough. Togetherness was a near foreign concept to him. He'd never been together, always set apart. He did not tend to the majority and it was often more of a hindrance than a help to work in close contact with others; he had his doubts about what spending time with her would do to his productivity, but was unwilling to speak of those concerns.

What if she took it too personally and withdrew?

Instead he stared and decided that said staring was justified. Watching her may provide some insight and did it not stand to reason that if he could better understand her, Light would also become easier to interpret? But, again, that wasn't something he could say to her. She would think he was with her only to gain a better perception of her brother and even though that wasn't the case it would be no simple matter to regain her trust if he lost it.

An explosion of anger or, perhaps worse, she would cry.

He'd been at a loss when tears came during the cross-examination. Her nose had turned red, her eyes glassy and she'd sounded so heartbroken that he hadn't been able to withstand simply watching.

Thinking of it now he supposed that had been when his regard for her began to grow. In those few moments she'd laid bare her heart; instead of the surly brat he was accustomed to dealing with she had only been girl afraid for her family.

He was still unsure of her claims to seeing the future; it wasn't that he disbelieved her, but he lacked the ability to understand how it was possible. Her description of Near was enough to convince him that she'd seen something. Whatever the case it was a heavy burden to bear and had added a new dimension to her character.

Sharing secrets with her was novel. He had many things that he kept private, things that not even Watari knew of, but no one had ever gone out of their way to tell him things they'd rather the rest of the world not know. Indeed she'd sent him a letter hinting at one of her most serious problems.

The thought brought a frown. He'd made a conscious effort to keep those ideas at bay, but the fact was that Haruka had been intimate with Light. It brought him no pleasure to ask, but some things needed to be discussed.

"Haruka."

She covered a yawn with her hand as her head lolled to the side, eyes landing on the grave expression worn by her... Whatever he was. 'Lover' didn't sound right, but neither did 'boyfriend'. She eyed him, he seemed to have something serious on his mind so she pushed into sitting position before nodding that he should continue.

"This will doubtless be an uncomfortable topic, but I need you to be honest."

Her shoulders slumped as she realized what he referencing. "Oh." She'd known this day was coming, but that didn't make it any easier.

"Was anything forced? Were you ever made to do things?"

She snorted. " _Things_. That's a polite way of putting it."

"I'm sorry–,"

"No. I was never forced and you don't have to be sorry. It's not your fault. You don't have to ask either, I'll tell you." This wasn't a moment she'd looked forward to. "It started on the staircase at home, long story short I tripped and knocked us both into the wall. I thought something was off just before that happened, but things got... tense. Everything snowballed from there. I'd hoped he'd just bumped his head a little too hard, but I guess I'd already realized the truth." With a deep breath she continued, "I told you before that _that_ was why I really started considering the idea of Light being Kira. It was so unlike him. He would have never done any of that! It makes no sense unless something else is involved, something I don't know about." She shook her head. "Anyway, we never went all the way, thankfully. I'm sure he was anticipating it, but then I was attacked so there was never a chance." Vague enough that she didn't feel like vomiting, yet descriptive enough for Ryuzaki to understand the circumstances.

It was harder to speak of it than she'd expected it to be. Haruka had told herself to throw shame away, none of those interactions had been for her enjoyment, but it seemed that being apart from Light made the memories even more difficult to stomach. When she was at home, in his presence, it was easier to deal with; she could look at him and remember why she consented to their affair. Now, in a hotel with a person she actually did care about in that way, it made her face heat in embarrassment.

To know that L knew what she'd been a willing participant in was gut-wrenching. To think that he had some idea of the things she'd done made her heart stutter. To wonder if this would be a deal breaker, if he would close off her just-opened access to his feelings, was heartbreaking.

As they sat in silence Ryuzaki considered Haruka's position. She was in a vulnerable state of mind, likely recalling things she'd rather not and he had nothing to say that would heal those wounds, but he could try to assure her that he placed no blame on her shoulders.

"Haruka." She did not look to him. "There is no reason to fault yourself, you made a choice to try and stop Kira from fulfilling his goals. There was no one else in a position such as yours, who could stand in the gap the way you were able to. You have undoubtedly saved more lives than we will ever be aware of and–,"

"You don't know that," she interrupted. "There is no way to know that I've done any good. For all you know I might have–,"

"I _do_ know that you've done good." He'd considered telling her before, of Near, and this moment called for it. "That boy you saw in the dream, I am aware of his identity. He is a child who may well be in that exact situation at some point in the future. He is one of two who, I suppose you could say, is vying for the title of 'L'. When I die it seems that he will be the one to take my place."

She shook her head again. He spoke of his own death with too even a tone. "You aren't going to die."

"I certainly will."

"Tch, no time soon."

"I am not afraid of passing away and have made many preparations in the event of my eventual demise. The probability of meeting my end on this case is near the ninety percent mark."

"No, you don't understand. I'm _telling you_ that you aren't going to die. I would know if you were!" His certainty of meeting his end grated on her already frayed nerves. She wasn't going to let him do it even if he was set on it. "You are _not_ dying. Even if I saw it happen, I would stop it."

A blink. A hundred breaths. A thousand heartbeats.

He had nothing to say to that.

/~/~/~/~/

"Light, get over it." She didn't have the patience to be gentle with him. "I don't know why you're upset, but I do know it's time to move on." Untrue. She knew exactly why he was angry with her. She'd pointed out the glaring holes in his plan to be god and he was immature enough to act out his frustration. "Dad will be concerned if he sees us acting like this and he's got enough to worry about. Let it go."

It was a reversal of roles. He'd always been the one to try and end arguments, the one to seek her out, and now she found herself taking on that duty. She'd gone to his classroom, requested his company, had led the way to the unused classroom and now she was telling him to grow up.

Backwards.

It felt wrong.

She was supposed to be the childish one, the one who held onto grudges and refused to say "I'm sorry", not him. Being Kira had done nothing good for his personality and yet he thought he could be god. It was unfathomable. How could he possibly believe he was capable of leading the human race in a positive direction? He couldn't even handle his own upsets! He'd regressed! Did he think everything would magically turn around if he won, that all his problems would disappear? She couldn't understand his thought process anymore. He'd truly gone insane if he thought he could rule the world in this state.

Maybe he had. Maybe he actually had lost his mind. How could he not have? Killing hundreds of people, planning to kill thousands more before all was said and done... Those weren't the actions of a person with a healthy psyche. Even if he thought those people deserved death there was no way the act of killing, however he did it, left his soul unblemished.

She could see even more changes in him now. Having been separated allowed her to notice gradual alterations that she would have missed had they been in close contact. He'd lost a bit of weight and the shadows beneath his eyes were darker. He was under a lot of stress and she hadn't made his life any easier with her Kira observations, but that didn't matter anymore. He was _Kira_ , the most dangerous serial killer the world had ever dealt with. The worst of the worst, the lowest of the low, he was a killer who'd had no fear of being caught. There'd been no skin in the game for him.

Criminals, FBI agents and she'd heard the task force speak of a woman, Misora, who'd gone missing and Kira had probably done away with her too.

This wasn't Light.

/~/~/~/~/

Light never did offer an apology, but she hadn't expected him to. This felt like an insurmountable obstacle. If he wasn't going to cave, and she wouldn't either, there was nowhere for them to go but down.

To tell him the truth, after all the things she'd said, would be as good as suicide. He knew she didn't support Kira and if he ever found out that she was aware of his role he would be forced to kill her whether he wanted to or not. For her that knowledge was the final nail in the coffin.

Light was dead and Kira had taken his place.

"So, Haruka-chan, what do you think you'll do next?"

The interview was nearing completion.

"Well, everything depends on the offers I get. Of course I'd love to do something like a commercial someday, but for now I'm glad for any opportunity to show my dedication."

They'd asked about the attack, she'd answered in brief and the questions rolled on. It had almost been an hour since she'd arrived at Sakura TV station and she was very ready to leave.

The interview wasn't being conducted for the low-repute network, nor would it air on their channel, but their studios had multiple conference rooms that were utilized by other professionals and Marker Magazine was one of them.

Marker was known for helping to launch the careers of many of Japan's idols. They caught them early, just as they started to rise, and pushed them into the spotlight. This interview with Marker was the best sign of her success thus far. Hideki, Ryuga had his time with them right before he became a big star. Amane, Misa had been featured mere days ahead of landing a lucrative contract. The rest had similar stories and she was anticipating a breakthrough.

Cameras were put away, hands met for final shakes and bows were exchanged in formal goodbye.

"Okada-san, I'm going to stop in the restroom for a moment, okay?"

"Of course, Haruka-chan. Can you find your way to the front? I'll bring the car around," she spoke as she pushed a back door and exited the building.

With a nod of acceptance Haruka left the company of her manager to find the halls eerily quiet. Where was everybody? This was a 24 hour network, people were always around, but as she walked into the bathroom she saw not a soul.

It was as she washed her hands that a familiar throb of pain shot through her forehead, left her breathless as she sank to the floor.

Ukita. Dead outside the Sakura TV building.

Like every time before the pain was gone as abruptly as it arrived; she had her phone at her ear before it fully faded.

/~/~/~/~/

Yagami, Light worked to project a feeling of calm. No one questioned him upon arrival, not even Ryuga. Instead they began speaking of the disappearance of Misora, Niomi. He had nothing to be concerned over. There was nothing to connect him to the woman.

"Light, do you have any thoughts on this?"

A test, he was sure of it, but this was one he could easily pass. "You said she's been missing for a long time? And the man she was engaged to was one of the FBI agents killed by Kira. I hate to say it, but that sounds like the kind of thing that might lead to suicide."

"So it does, however I was personally acquainted with Misora and suicide is too easy an answer. If she could be found, dead or alive, we might have a clue to what really happened."

"Shouldn't we open an investigation into this matter?" Matsuda asked.

"If we do it should be coordinated separately from the Kira case," L said. "And we should use police sketches rather than actual photographs."

Aizawa interjected, "We're talking about somebody whose been missing for over a month already. Chances are she's probably dead."

"Ryuzaki," Watari entered the room, his voice hurried, and he spoke over the sudden ring of L's cell phone. "Something seems to be happening on Sakura TV."

A glance at the name on the screen and Ryuzaki was on his feet, the phone held securely in his hand. This difference did not go unnoticed by most of those present.

"What is it?"

"Ukita can't leave the hotel room!" she spoke quickly. "And no one else either. No one is allowed to leave! Do you understand?"

"Something is happening at Sakura TV. Where are you now?" He'd moved to stand by the window, neglected to answer the questioning eyes of the team as Watari wheeled a television into the room.

"...At the Sakura TV station."

/~/~/~/~/

She heard his short, sharp intake of breath, but his voice remained level. "Listen to this broadcast. I'm putting the phone on speaker."

"...In other words all the reporters and staff here are Kira's hostages..."

Haruka supposed that effectively made her a hostage as well, though she thought she might be able to get out of the building undetected if she took the back exit.

This made sense though. Ukita would rush to the station to stop the broadcast only to get himself killed by Kira in front of the building.

"Ryuzaki!" she shouted. She had no worry of being overhead. Still closed in the women's restroom she'd not heard a sound from the hallway. No one, not even a security team, was wandering the halls right now; they were all waiting for the end, waiting to see what would happen once the tapes were aired.

"Haruka?"

"Damn," she whispered. Light was there. Even so there was nothing she could do about it. She raised her voice and barked an order, "No one can leave. I'll go stop the broadcast."

"That is _not–_ "

"There isn't exactly a whole lot of time right now, L. It's not like you can stop me. People have already died, right? Newscasters, people who have done absolutely nothing wrong, were just killed on national television and this Kira is about to 'send a message' to the world. It has to be stopped. I'm going."

She hung up, turned her phone off and ran to the corridor, pushing open every door in her path. She came across a makeup room and made an impromptu stop to pull on a wig, put in a pair of colored contacts and pocket a cloth mask. It would do no good to bust into the broadcast room only to be killed the moment she entered.

This wasn't Light's Kira. This was something different, another person with the impossible power of killing with heart attacks from a distance. Even Light hadn't fallen this low yet. The two murdered TV personalities had been outspoken against Kira, but that had never been something he cared about. With his ego he'd assumed everyone would eventually fall in line. There'd been no reason to kill them.

"Excuse me, sir?" A man in a uniform was stationed at the end of this hall. She was getting close, but she needed a weapon. There was no way the money hungry dirtbag who ran this station was going to let her walk away with his ratings.

His eyes widened in surprise, but she was glad to note that he didn't seem threatened by her abrupt appearance. "Miss, what are you doing here?"

"I had an appointment," she stepped closer. "Could you tell me what's going on? I'm a little concerned. I haven't seen anyone at all for, like, ten minutes now and I think I'm lost."

He had no time to react as she reached for the pressure point on his neck.

"Sorry," she whispered, flinching as his body hit the floor with a thud. "Ooo. You'll be alright though, I hope."

Luckily he'd been well armed and after taking his gun she continued down the hall and around a corner where she finally found a door with a shining signal light. She paused briefly to secure the covering to the lower half of her face and then slammed into the room shouting, "Stop this broadcast or I'll shoot you now!"

/~/~/~/~/

"Was that Haruka-chan?!" Matsuda asked, aghast. "Did she just say _she_ was at the station!?"

Ryuzaki and Light both tried, and failed, to re-establish a connection.

" _The person you have dialed is either out of the service area or has turned off their phone. Please leave a message–."_

"Aihara-san, you know Deputy Director Kitamura's cell phone number, correct?" He did. "Light, please get in contact with your father. Rely to him the information I'm about to give Kitamura."

/~/~/~/~/

There was nothing for him to do but follow Ryuga's direction. In any case he didn't think himself capable of forming coherent independent thoughts at the moment.

Shock. Utterly shocked. What in the hell was going on? He had nothing to do with this broadcast, nothing to do with Sakura TV at all. He didn't even watch the channel. Their Kira support was all for show and rather obnoxious. In the beginning he'd appreciated the outlet for taking a firm stand on Kira's side, but they'd gone way over the top and into the realm of ridiculous quickly.

Haruka was there _._ Of all the places she had to be, why there and why now? That stupid interview because of her stupid desire for fame! And now she was trapped in the middle of it all, trying to stop the broadcast and–

The television screen went blank.

/~/~/~/~/

Soichiro could hardly believe the things he was hearing, but this wasn't the moment for disbelief.

He moved into a car with tinted windows, cell phone still at his ear, and the police procession toward Sakura TV station began.

/~/~/~/~/

She hid in a janitorial closet and stowed the hand gun in the bag full of Other Kira paraphernalia. The weapon would be gotten rid of later, but it was covered in her fingerprints and it would be foolish to leave it behind.

Her phone rang the moment she turned it back on.

"I will thank you for _never doing that again_ , Haruka-san." There was a hard edge to his voice; she thought he might be close to yelling. "When you return there are a few things I will need to speak to you about, so please go to the front of the building as quickly as possible without raising more suspicion."

"Well, I stopped the broadcast didn't I?"

He hung up without a reply.

The directive was followed and she managed to keep the pause in her gait brief as she left the building. It was a surprise, to say the least, to see the brigade stationed in front of her. This was definitely a stand against the new Kira and the old; she doubted the general population had any idea that this was the work of someone else, but it was still a brave move on the part of the police.

She refrained from speaking to her father, who was behind the wheel, as she pulled off her disguise and dialed the cell phone of her manager.

Okada was beside herself on the other end of the line, nearly cried in relief when Haruka told her that she'd gotten out of the building safely. A tale was told and gratefully accepted, forgiveness assured, and the call came to end just as they arrived at the hotel.

She was subjected to an unexpected embrace when her father hugged her and couldn't find it in herself to do anything but return the affection. She could only imagine how worried he must have been once he'd realized what she was doing. Still, he would worry even more if she didn't put on her 'strong, independent woman' face.

"Geez Dad. It's fine! I stopped the broadcast and got the things that were sent to the station. Let's just go already!"

His sigh was a tired one, but she knew he was glad to hear the familiar tone of impatience.

Nothing more was said between them and the second she set foot in the door of the suite she was being pulled by the upper arm away from the task force.

Closed in that dark, bare room once more she prepared for the unleashing of L's wrath. Surely he was going to shout at her? He probably wanted to hit her.

Ryuzaki did neither of those things. Instead he kissed her forehead, her nose, her cheeks, and she wondered if she might have broken the detective because it really wasn't like him.

"Hey! Stop that! What are you doing?" She tried to wiggle away as one of his arms snaked around her waist, pulling her close. "This is too weird, Ryuzaki! Be normal again!" Her commands went unnoticed. "I'm fine so stop it already!"

The protests were halfhearted. In actuality this attention had her on cloud nine, but there were other things to be doing.

"I love you."

There was _nothing_ else to be doing.

 **Other Facts**

Ryuk says there was no 'fate' involved, that the whole thing was an accident. "It just happened to fall around here and you just happened to pick it up." He is incorrect.


	13. Logical Love

**Disclaimer: If '47 Sky' is a real place I don't have anything to do with it.** _ **  
**_

 _ **A/N: I've added this story to the Inkitt Fandom 2 contest. I've got a link you can copy/paste on my profile to the story if you'd be wiling to go give it a review & vote for it. I need to be in the top 10% to be considered for final judging, the top voted story so far has 50 votes. I'd appreciate your help if you're enjoying DNR!**_

 ** _NOTE: It is currently listed at #380 under 'Most Voted' with 0 votes...Sadly enough. I FEEL LIKE A FAILURE. (Gosh, I hope this doesn't impact my emotional stability and the frequency of updates...)_  
**

 _Chapter 13_

Logical Love

The realization that she was in imminent danger, running head long into peril, had done strange things to L's heart and mind. He felt he'd hidden his affliction well enough to keep the suspicion of the task force members at bay, but now that she was back he could hardly be expected to contain himself.

Part of him wanted to yell at her, to admonish her for taking such a risk, but she'd done the right thing and he couldn't fault her for it. That broadcast had to be stopped, she'd been within the facility and had taken the initiative to do what needed to be done.

Her lack of response to his confession was attributed to shock, as her eyes were wide and her lips set in a small 'O' shape.

He found it difficult to understand why she hadn't slapped him yet, felt that he didn't deserve to hold her this way. He'd done many wrong things, had turned a temporary blind eye to criminal activities that worked in his favor and as much as he'd never cared before he recognized that he was socially inept. These were all strikes against him, ones he'd never thought mattered because the idea of being with anyone in this way hadn't been considered.

In any event there were words that needed to be spoken, facts he needed to find out.

"What happened?"

That was what _she_ wanted to know. What had happened to make him act this way? Was it her recent brush with death? Being in a building so clearly targeted by a Kira and deciding to take matters into her own hands had probably forced him to reconcile his feelings for her.

Well, she hadn't planned it, but she couldn't say she wasn't glad for it.

Haruka caught him off guard when she kissed him, threw her arms around his neck and made him stumble with the force of her attack, but she'd pulled away only a moment later, talking a mile a minute.

"I went to the bathroom after my interview, thought it was kind of weird that no one was around, but I didn't know what was going on when I saw Ukita dead so I just called you because I recognized the building to make sure no one would leave so they couldn't die like I'd seen and since I was already there I decided to stop it myself and if I had left my phone on you would have given me away by calling it or something so I _had_ to turn it off and I'm not sorry. Also, I'm going to have to tell Light about what I saw because otherwise he'll be suspicious and he doesn't know that you know so don't say anything about it because I don't want to deal with another tantrum that could end with me dead and I don't think Light did this."

Her words were spoken so hastily that he had difficulty comprehending what she told him, but most of what she expressed had already been surmised. She'd seen a death and had the opportunity to prevent it. She was of the opinion, one that he held as well, that this Kira was different than the first.

"You will explain the circumstances to the task force," he directed, opening the door and walking ahead of her, hands in his pockets and back bent.

She almost sighed. His telling her he loved her was a shock; she'd hoped he felt that way, had tired to keep her own feelings from growing in that direction for fear that he never would. To hear it from him, to know that he meant what he said, made her heart melt, but Ryuzaki had returned to his usual state of mind and she wondered if they would ever have a chance to play at being normal, or as normal as L could ever be.

She wanted to reach for the hem of his shirt, wondered what he would think of her for that childish display of affection, but didn't do it. Even though there was time, a moment she could have used, she kept her hands to her sides. What would reaching for him accomplish? He would pause for half-a-second, walk forward and because her grip would be loose the fabric would slip from her fingers; she would blush, embarrassed by her lack of tact, and it would be noticed by task force.

Maybe he would have been happy? Maybe he would have smiled that odd smile of his?

Now she would never know.

The thought lodged itself in her mind. Never knowing. Never knowing if it would have made Ryuzaki happy to have her reach for him. How many other things would she never know?

Just a few steps away now. The end of the hall was right there and they'd be in view of everyone else. Her father. Matsuda. Ukita. Mogi. Aizawa. Light. Even Watari. "Ryuzaki," she spoke suddenly, pivoted and moved back down the hallway before he had the chance to object. "Come here for a minute. There's something else I have to tell you."

She heard him sigh, but he did follow her.

All the way to the other end of the hall she went, passing the door they'd been closed behind only fifteen seconds ago, and when he stood behind her she took a deep breath, closed her eyes and ordered him to, "Turn around!"

He considered this command, thought of questioning the purpose. What was she doing? He wanted to know, but as he examined her he realized that she stood stiffly. Agitated. To question her would bring no satisfactory answer, so he did as she said and turned his back to her.

"Did you do it?"

"I did."

Haruka bit her lip. This felt stupid, but which was worse? A little humiliation or never knowing?

Her face was cherry-red before she took the very edge of his shirt between her finger tips and she couldn't stand to look at him when he glanced back in surprise, but she forced the question from her lips because she had to know. "Does- does this make you- happy?"

He blinked. She'd stopped their return to the task force, delayed telling necessary information, to find out if this strange little act of fondness would cause him to have a favorable reaction? Truly he could not understand her reasoning, thought he might be doomed to never know why Haruka did most of the things she did, but if he was to be honest then, "Yes." In fact it wasn't just this moment that made his heart swell, but that she'd brought shame to herself, and he was sure she did feel ashamed, to find out if something she did would make him happy. "However, I want to know why you felt this experiment couldn't wait."

"It's depressing," she muttered as her light clasp tightened. "It's really depressing, but I thought if I don't do it now, maybe I never will." She hated that her vision blurred, but she looked to him anyway. "I thought of doing it before and didn't. I thought it didn't really matter, but then I realized it might have made you happy and I would never know." She wiped at her eyes furiously with the unoccupied hand. "I'm not even really sad right now. I don't know why I'm crying." An uneven breath. "I just had to know and I had to know now because what if–" she didn't want to say it. "What if I don't get to find out later?"

/~/~/~/~/

As it turned out L didn't have a reply to give her after that admission. Instead he looked away and stood still for another moment before heading toward the living room once again. She held onto his shirt the entire time, right to the edge of the room.

Now she was made to sit between her father and Light, while the latter attempted to wipe her eyes with his handkerchief. She swatted his hands away, insisted she was fine, and launched into an abridged retelling of the last few hours.

"I was already at Sakura TV for an interview. My manger went to bring the car around and I went to the bathroom. It seemed a little eerie, I didn't see anyone, but while I was in there I overheard some people talking in the hallway about what was going on and I decided I could stop the broadcast myself." Light didn't believe her, she knew he didn't; his hand flexed on her knee.

"Haruka," he father spoke. "That was foolish."

"No, what would have been foolish is someone else rushing in there. They would have just died right? I was there already. I didn't have to go outside or anything." She argued her case. "I wore that disguise, I'm positive no one recognized me and-" she broke off, her eyes widened and she cringed. Soichiro wasn't going to like this part. "And, I might have knocked out a guard and stolen his gun and maybe it's still in my purse because it has my fingerprints on it so I couldn't leave it behind and maybe the surveillance should be wiped because if anyone goes back to look at it they'll see me go into a dressing room and the person who held the staff at gun point come out, but the point is I stopped the broadcast and got the tapes, right?"

If there was ever a moment for her father to go into cardiac arrest this was it, even Light looked genuinely shocked. L's expression hadn't changed, but his eyes were locked on her and the rest of the task force was in stunned silence.

"So you know, Dad, those self-defense classes were a really good idea. Really."

/~/~/~/~/

It was nearly two hours later that she was allowed to leave the presence of the group. The weapon would be appropriately disposed of, the surveillance had already been taken care of and she was made to explain, more than once, exactly what had happened. By the end of it Haruka found herself hoping she would never again find herself in a situation like that, if only to avoid the interrogation that came afterward.

Light's false concern was sickening, so much so that she'd shrugged away from him, to his silent fury, when he tried to put his arm around her. She knew she'd upset him, but she couldn't help feeling that this was all his fault. Those dead newscasters were Kira's fault. Was this not exactly what she'd warned him about? A crazed supporter, obviously after Kira's attention, had gone haywire. This new murderer had somehow acquired the same power and was trying to win approval from the original.

If he thought she was done talking about Kira's numerous missteps he had another thing coming. This would add fuel to her fire and, even though she knew without a shadow of a doubt that it was absurd, she hoped it would cause him to rethink what he'd been doing. Maybe he would stop and find a way to undo the damage.

It was ridiculous and impossible, but that tiny flame refused to flicker even now. Human nature was a powerful, foolish thing and she'd learned that she wasn't as immune to it's effects as she'd thought she was. Never had Haruka thought herself prone to wishful thinking, but it seemed she couldn't help it.

When he followed her into her bedroom she wished he was just concerned. When he closed the door behind them, turned the lock, she berated herself for hoping he wasn't about to try what she knew he was about to try. When he stood behind her, put his hands on her shoulders and leaned forward to kiss her cheek... She didn't even know what she wanted anymore.

There was no point in wanting something that would never be hers.

Light wasn't coming back. Her brother was gone, dead, replaced by Kira and he was the one she'd been engaging in sexual acts with. He was the one her father stubbornly defended, totally oblivious to the truth of the situation. Kira had killed hundreds of criminals, had now spawned a copycat who didn't seem to hold the same ideals and now he was with her.

She wouldn't waste these few minutes.

"I was right, right? Is this your kind of apology, Onii-chan?" She could feel his annoyance. Clearly this wasn't what he'd had in mind. "Well, I don't want it. I've had a long day because of Kira and his lack of forethought and I really just want a bath. Alone." _Back off_.

He was grinding his teeth, she could hear the scraping, and his voice was tight when he replied. "You haven't missed me at all have you?"

For whatever reason that was the final straw for Haruka. Tears of fury pooled and she whipped around to face him; the angry crimson shine in his eyes was proof enough that he didn't care what she'd been though. She could act tough, but at the end of the day she'd held a gun to the face of a man, never mind that he was a scumbag, and threatened his life.

Kira didn't care.

"You think I don't miss you?" She could hardly say it. He didn't know anything. "I can't even describe how much I miss Light." He didn't understand what she said, of course he didn't and he never would. "But right now, right this very moment, I am _fucking tired!_ " She pushed him and he was too appalled by her language to do anything about it. "I'm _fucking_ tired and I _know_ you don't care. I know you don't care and I know you don't understand because if you did you wouldn't be asking me that question. Now get out!"

He didn't move, just stared at her. It was like he couldn't believe she'd speak to him that way. Just a month ago she would never have thought to, but this was not the past and as she shoved him out the door she hated herself, and _him_ , and even her father and her mother. She hated that she'd been born. She hated that she'd put herself in this position. She hated how blind her parents were.

But, she was done crying. Sinking into despair would do nothing worthwhile.

Instead she did as she'd said she would. A long, hot bath was deserved and she would be damned if she let anyone, even herself, guilt her out of it.

/~/~/~/~/

Furious was not a strong enough adjective to describe the emotion that Light felt and for the first time in months it was directed at himself. He'd contemplated ending Haruka's life on his own terms before, but to think that her death could have come at the hands of someone else was unacceptable.

" _... because of Kira and his lack of forethought..."_

She blamed Kira for this and he found, though he tried to deconstruct her arguments, that she wasn't wrong. It was as she'd said. A supporter run amok, trying to garner his attention, had moved into the realm of objectionable behavior. To top it off this couldn't be just any supporter; this was someone who had access to a Death Note.

Who was this absolute idiot impersonating him? Why would they think this was acceptable behavior? The moment he found out who this other 'Kira' was they would meet their end.

"Amane." That strange blond girl. She bothered him. The things she'd said, certainly she hadn't been speaking to Haruka, hinted at something he couldn't dismiss. It was absurd, but he felt sure she knew. As per usual Ryuk was no help, refusing to give even the slightest of hints though his laughter when Amane was mentioned was clue enough.

If his suspicions were correct she'd gotten hold of a Death Note and had likely made a deal with a Shinigami for the eyes. From the little he knew of her she was a Kira supporter and the quintessential dumb blond. She'd become a model using her looks and cutesy attitude. Whether or not she was actually as stupid as she pretended to be didn't matter, if this was her doing he would have to get rid of her, but it wouldn't be safe to do that with L so focused on him.

The detective had to know that he'd met Amane and for her to suddenly die would only make him suspicious. Even if by all rights it seemed like a freak accident Ryuzaki would undoubtedly try to hold him responsible.

L would realize this wasn't the work of the original Kira. As deeply as Light despised the man he recognized that he held his position for a reason. He would want to find this culprit and if they were as foolish as they seemed it would be no difficult task to call them out.

Either this was a person to be used or discarded. If this was Amane Misa, if she was as devoted to Kira as she seemed to be...

No. That was too dangerous. This whole incident put her on the kill list, if it was her, and she needed to disappear. It didn't matter what the level of allegiance was, this had been a dicey move and he couldn't afford to have people acting on their own this way, but neither could he be the one to rid the world of this nuisance.

He would allow L to create the plan that would call out the impostor Kira. If it worked and that person ended up in a cell he would then orchestrate their death.

/~/~/~/~/

"Your brother is going to record a message to the other Kira."

"Whatever."

The moment she returned to the hotel she'd known that she wouldn't be able to play her part. The school day, coupled with a long meeting at the agency to discuss potential steps after she turned eighteen, had taken all her energy. She'd never thought herself weak, but that evening at Sakura TV had done a number on her.

"We'll be moving to a permanent location at the end of the month."

Had she not been so exhausted by life she would have found that interesting, as it was she hardly shrugged before trudging away from the task force and into her room. They were undoubtedly worried about her state of mind, afraid that she was on the precipice of a mental break, but if she could get some real rest she'd be fine.

Fortunately that agency meeting had cleared many hurdles. There were things for her to consider now, like how soon she'd try to transition into more adult modeling, if she did at all, but it was something different to focus on.

Like how her father would definitely meet an early grave if he was ever unfortunate enough to see her in an underwear ad.

She shuddered at the thought. Even a bathing suit collection was toeing the line of impropriety where he was concerned. She didn't think he'd go looking for her ads, but it wasn't impossible that one would come to his attention.

For the moment she'd agreed to do a magazine advertisement and a commercial for a high end perfume. If this went well, if there was a noticeable spike in sales and talk about the product, the company had agreed to put up a billboard.

Misa-Misa hadn't been on a signboard yet.

An unrestrained smirk that rivaled the worst look she'd ever seen on Light's face could not be helped. The idea of beating someone to the top was more satisfying than she'd thought it could be. Haruka hadn't entered the modeling business with any particular goal in mind when it came to winning out over other talents; she wanted influence over the general population and she'd never thought to consider others rivals, but if she had one it was Amane.

They were very different. Misa spoke of herself in third person, was seen as a cute, happy girl without a care in the world. Haruka knew now that wasn't true, Misa had a dark past, but that was the way the public saw her and maybe that was her true nature. Amane could be one of those people who was bubbly all the time.

Haruka had never tried to put on that act. It was one that worked, she knew it did, but it was overplayed and she didn't have the confidence that she could put on that face without ever slipping up. She wasn't that kind of person and to pretend to be would only make her seem fake.

Very different indeed and Misa had been in the spotlight longer. This was something of a test. Who did the public trust more? Amane had done many promotions before, good ones, but nothing that rose to the level of garnering enough attention to put her on a billboard.

To have her face on high, lit up for all of Tokyo to see, before she left high school would be a huge accomplishment.

Still, Essence-Aroma had set the bar higher than she'd ever imagined trying to reach and it would be no easy task to meet their expectations. This would come down to whether or not she was capable of rising beyond 'acceptable' to 'extraordinary'. They wouldn't have chosen her if not for that incident with the drug addict, she knew it; her face was still fresh in the minds of consumers so it would be a boost and she'd gained a lot of positive attention for returning to work immediately after the attack.

The contract made it clear that she would be replaced if she couldn't meet the expectations of the photographers and director.

The fragrance was titled Enchanted. She already had an overview of the advert and a copy of the concept art; she was supposed be something like a fairytale princess lost in a dream. Wandering through a sound stage forest in a half-awake state she would find the crystal bottle and spritz the scented liquid.

The details needed to be finalized as far as filming was concerned.

She felt she had an advantage. Her entire life felt like a dream at the moment, admittedly more of a nightmare most of the time, but she could imagine this.

A girl moving through a hazy imaginary world softly, gracefully. Finding a beautiful bottle full of some curious colored fluid, desiring to find out what it was.

It reminded her of Alice in Wonderland.

This was the type of advertisement, if done well, that she liked. There was more to it than using a popular idol to sell the product, there was a real idea behind the campaign; certainly this wasn't anything like that recent soda commercial Hideki had done. All flashing lights and bright colors. Nothing about the ad had anything to do with the drink, not that it seemed to matter. He was still popular enough that his face alone was enough to sell just about anything, but she'd noted multiple people in his target range pass a poster for something different without looking at it even once.

Overexposure was striking again. If his management was intelligent they would become more discerning about which companies they associated with before they lost too many fans.

Whatever happened to the celebrity of Ryuga, Hideki was no loss to her; she needed to focus on her own career with the hope of avoiding the pitfalls and trappings of fame. It would be very easy to say yes to products just to fill her schedule, but she couldn't afford to loose credibility.

It was better to accept only a few amazing offers than to take on a load of mediocre ones.

With that in mind she poked her head out the door, listened for the voices of the task force. More specifically for Ryuzaki's voice, but she heard nothing. With small, careful steps she peeked into the living room. No one was there.

" _Your brother is going to record a message to the other Kira."_

Right. They were probably doing that. Kira contacting Kira.

She snorted. Of all the convoluted paths for her life to have taken, why did this have to be the one? She shook the thoughts away before they could cement themselves; that wasn't a productive line of thinking.

Instead of returning to her room Haruka found herself drawn to L's chair, her legs moving on their own accord to stand beside his seat. She wanted to sit there, but who knew when they would finish their work and return? To be found in Ryuzaki's spot would lead to questions she couldn't answer and would probably tip Light off to her newest secret.

He could never know. He would definitely kill her and would damn well try to do the same to L with even more furor than before. This was something Kira would never forgive her for.

A chill shot through her veins as a new thought occurred to her. Perhaps death wasn't the worst he could do. If he was truly obsessed with her, if he really did need to have her, death might be too kind.

A horrendous thought and yet she couldn't dispel the fear that things may have progressed even beyond that point. He'd been surprisingly lenient during school, not pushing for anything, but that didn't mean he wasn't plotting something.

"Plotting," she murmured. "Planning..." her eyes widened. "No way."

Haruka looked quickly about the room, searching for a calendar, and her eyes came to rest on a planner left upon the coffee table. She snatched it from it's resting place, flipped it open to the marked page.

"No way," she repeated. It was the ninth. The ninth of February. Their birthday was only nineteen days away. "How did I forget?"

Plotting? He certainly was. She knew it. What would Light want on this birthday? There was only one thing she could think of and it explained his more amiable attitude. He wasn't trying to pull her closer because he planned to take it all.

Sudden weakness overcame her and she found herself on the edge of L's chair, gripping the arm rest with one hand while the other moved to her forehead.

Light was waiting, exercising patience while expecting that the real prize would soon be his. It made absolute sense. He'd always been one to appreciate symbolism and this could be the ultimate in symbolic moments. Being physically joined on their eighteenth birthday in an act that was supposed to be limited to lovers.

 _Of course_ that was what he planned and she wondered why she hadn't realized it sooner.

There would be no escaping this on her own. To be afraid or try and pull back would assure his wrath. He believed in her love, in her blindness to the truth, and there was no reason for love-sick Haruka to turn Light down when there was no possibility of being caught.

She had nineteen days to find a way to avoid having sex with her older brother.

/~/~/~/~/

 **Eighteen days.**

She couldn't keep herself from dwelling on it. The school day passed in a blur of words, pencils and false smiles. Her friends didn't see her distraction, they were too caught up trying to prepare for their own futures to worry about hers, and at lunch Light behaved in the way she expected him too. He didn't act as though he wanted anything but kisses, didn't talk about anything of importance.

He was biding his time.

Haruka could only imagine what his full plan might be. A surprise birthday gift most likely. Perhaps taking her out to a fancy hotel restaurant, orchestrating a series of calamities that would lead to them being forced to stay for the night. Pretending to be wholly innocent, acting as though he was shocked by the turn of events and then seducing her while they were 'trapped'.

Really, he could have any number of plans to get them alone. Kira could do anything to anyone. All he needed was a criminal to manipulate and he could engineer the perfect scenario while remaining free of suspicion.

 **Seventeen days.**

She didn't speak to Light at all on Sunday. A few extra hours of sleep were well spent, but the moment her shrill alarm sounded she was on the move. To the shower, to the suitcase, out the door with a purse to meet her manager. She'd hardly said a word to the familiar faces in the living room before exiting, wondered too late if that might be rude, but dismissed the thought. They had enough to be doing. Enough to be worrying about.

No doubt anything she said would come out the wrong way in _his_ presence. The simple act of looking at him was almost too difficult to handle.

 **Sixteen days.**

Another day at school, another day of playing her role and hiding the darkness. They could never know. They wouldn't believe it even if she told them; she didn't think they would be able to accept it, regardless of the declarations they'd made.

It was a strange idea. To think that they'd put enough thought into the matter to form an actual opinion on the subject was a bit frightening. How much effort had that taken? Why had it been something on their minds in the first place? Certainly it wasn't normal to imagine incestuous relations between a friend and her brother, right?

Little did they know.

 **Fifteen days.**

There were other tasks to focus on, other thoughts that called for her attention. She couldn't spend all her time worrying about something that might not even happen.

The planning for the Aroma-Essence commercial was moving forward at a reasonable pace. She'd participated in another meeting that evening and it seemed filming was on track to begin the next week. If she did well it would be done in a day. If she was simply passable it might take two. Three days of filming would be unacceptable.

One shot to leave her mark on the city, one opportunity to get her face on one of the most coveted billboards in Tokyo. If she let this chance slip away she may not have another.

But, before that, there was something else to be taken care of.

 **Fourteen days.**

She gave Light his chocolate during school; in hindsight it may not have been the best idea as he was also obligated to accept all the gifts given by classmates who worked up their courage to present homemade candies to him.

She couldn't be sure what he thought of her offering, the atmosphere wasn't exactly conductive to inappropriate displays of affection, so the kiss he pressed to her cheek could have been done in obligation or actual thanks.

Haruka doubted he was thankful. Surely he expected to be given something by her; Light would have been furious if she'd been bold enough to slight him. His narcissism had reach epic proportions. Though he'd been shocked by L's forwardness he had recovered safely, had given no clues to his true motivations. It was still impossible to incriminate him as Kira.

He did not go to the hotel that day so she was free to give chocolates to the task force and Watari, though Matsuda wasn't there and would receive his later in the night when someone went to relieve him of his position at the police station. Ryuzaki had been presented with his share that morning, before she left for school. There was no telling what Soichiro would have thought had he known, as it was he shook his head at what appeared to be a show of dishonor, but Haruka thought he seemed a little relieved.

Shut away in her bedroom she recalled how embarrassing it had been to give candy to L. He was the last person in the world who needed more sugar, but she'd felt duty-bound to give him something. In the end she made him fruit based lollipops, not chocolate, just to feel better about giving him sweets.

Blushing as hotly as ever she'd pushed a white box decorated with a pink bow into his hands and declared that it was a Valentine's Day present before rushing out the door and leaving for school.

She didn't know what he'd thought of them, hadn't waited to find out. If he didn't like the sweets he was sure to tell her without consideration for her feelings. Now it was a matter of waiting for the others to leave.

Haruka shook her head at herself. She'd never thought she'd be in a position to worry over what someone thought of a gift she'd given them, she didn't think she'd ever worked so hard preparing a present either. Thankfully she wasn't inept in the kitchen and it was easy enough to follow directions so making his lollipops hadn't been a hassle, but it was more work than she was used to putting in. If she'd gone through all that and he didn't like them, well, she wasn't sure what she would do.

" _Ba_ ka," she muttered. Like it mattered whether he actually ate them or not. It was the thought that counted.

 **Thirteen days.**

It wasn't the thought that counted.

She wanted to kill the Other Kira herself. The murders on live television were bad enough, but all of this new work kept her away from L. She had no idea what he'd thought of her Valentine's Day gift and there was no safe opportunity to ask him about it.

There were at least two members of the Task Force at the hotel at all times, Watari had informed her that the others were on duty at the police station, waiting to see if any tapes would be sent there. It was more likely a reply would go to Sakura TV, but in either case the police would view them first.

What that meant for her was that she had no chance to see L alone.

 **Twelve days.**

She received an invitation to the grand opening of a new club in downtown Tokyo in the morning. She'd gone to an early shoot before school, one that saw her awake before dawn and she'd been hopeful that this would finally give her a chance to speak to L, but even at that hour there were task force members present.

The request came from '47 Sky' and it was set to open on Saturday, March 3, just a few days after her 18th birthday. They were sending out invites to many rising stars with the hopes of earning good press.

A text arrived from Amane asking her if she was going to attend while she in was the middle of break at school.

 _We can meet b4 we go! Misa knows a g8 salon that does everything, even clothes!_

The sparkly, emoticon filled message generated waves of excited chatter, though she'd attempted to keep it to herself, and the gossip spread like wildfire. She had no hope of keeping the plans from Light.

 **Eleven days.**

He was against it, totally and completely as she'd known he would be, but Haruka refused to surrender this battle. If she gave him an inch he would take a mile, she was sure of it. To allow him even an extra ounce of control would be the end of living autonomously.

He played dirty though, told their father about her opportunity in an off-hand tone during the next task force meeting. Watching Soichiro so closely Light failed to see the momentary stillness that overcame L, but Haruka noticed.

She almost felt bad when his eyes flickered to hers, but she turned away to deal with her purple faced father.

"Dad, don't worry! I'm even going with someone—"

That did _not_ help.

"A girl! I'm going with Misa, another model you know? Sayu has a magazine with her on it! Calm down, geeze!"

 **Ten days**.

He wanted to tell her not to go. Of course he had never been to a nightclub, but he knew enough to understand that behaviors that would have otherwise been deemed unacceptable would be encouraged.

Jealousy. That's what this was. Deep, seething envy and he didn't like it, but he was no longer a stranger to this emotion.

Light went to school with her, had the chance to see her everyday and spent time alone with her doing unspeakable things...

And _he'd_ only kissed her _twice_.

 **Nine.**

 **Eight.**

 **Seven days.**

She'd done it. She could hardly believe it. Even now, several hours later, she still felt as though she was wandering through a dreamworld.

In all honesty Haruka'd not had much confidence in her abilities. She hadn't ever been on camera this way before, home videos taken during her toddler years didn't count, and she'd felt so pressured to do well that she'd been sure she would crack under the strain.

But, her fears proved unnecessary. They'd been nodding their heads off to the side when she finished the first round of takes; she saw them standing and staring with critical expressions as they appraised her every move and when the first final shot came they turned to one another with smiles so tiny that she hadn't dared to hope that she'd actually seen them.

She was going to be on a billboard.

 **Six.**

 **Five.**

 **Four.**

 **Three days.**

They had a party for her at the office, both in celebration of her upcoming birthday and her milestone achievement.

 **Two.**

 **One.**

 **Zero days.**

Time was up.

 **Wednesday February 28, 2007**

She'd been permitted to return home after school, though only for a few hours and then she was to be on her way back to task force headquarters. Her mother and Sayu were in raptures over her return, so much so that she couldn't help making a face at Light as she was welcomed with more enthusiasm than he was.

Their mother had made a veritable feast, and cake was had by all, after Haruka gave her assurances that all was well.

She was on the edge of her seat the entire time. His plan, whatever it was, was about to be set in motion. Something was going to happen that would get them alone and he–

"What?" Deadpanned. His face showed no emotion and that usually meant anger. His cellphone had rung as the dishes were cleared away, but she'd missed whatever expression had come when he first heard the voice on the other end of the line. "Fine." He hung up without a goodbye; that could mean only one thing: L had just ruined his designs.

 **Death Note Facts**

The Shinigami have no ability to fully comprehend or experience the true power of the Death Note.


	14. Haruka's Haste Or

_Chapter 14_

Request For Ryuzaki

Haruka would never know what Light had planned for them, but a criminal did die on the night of their eighteenth birthday in an elaborate show that would have delayed their return to the hotel had they taken the most direct route. She could only imagine where that was supposed to lead them, but in any event his plan was derailed.

They did go to HQ, but this was different. The days of skipping between hotels were over; well disguised as a luxury apartment building, complete with lower floor shops, the new official headquarters would never be suspected of housing a team of investigators who were chasing Kira.

Looking up at the towering building now Haruka remembered seeing it under construction and wondering what kinds of people would be able to afford to live there.

A valet stood ready to take the car into the private parking garage, a door man welcomed their arrival. The windows were tinted and it would be impossible for anyone on the street to see what was going on, even in the entrance hall. It would seem to the public that this was a building designed for the super rich and famous.

She, Light and their father entered the lobby and were greeted by the rest of the task force. All of them.

Haruka tsk'd at the sight of L, still without shoes and looking like a hunchback. He did not at all fit in with the surrounding opulence. Honestly he didn't seem to fit anywhere except that small, dark room with his laptop and microphone.

Genius and very close to insanity.

Yet, in the end, she supposed that _she_ was the crazier of the two. She was the one who'd wanted to start a relationship despite his eccentricities.

Stupid.

"As you are aware this building has become the permanent location for the task force meetings. These gatherings will be held in the basement, in a room accessible only with a certain type of card key and pin code. The rest of the building is a front though it will function as designed for the sake of the illusion." L spoke in his usual monotone, offered no change in pitch when Watari stepped forward to hand an envelope each to the twins. "You could think of these birthday gifts, but really they're for the sake of my convenience."

Within both missives were store bought 'Happy Birthday' cards, the generic type with pictures of a dancing cake and numeral candles indicating that they were meant for an eighteenth year celebration. However, what was inside the cards was different.

Light got his open first to find a card key and another key. A car key.

"Obviously you'll have to pass the driving test and be issued a license, but once that is done you will find the vehicle within the parking garage."

With her brother suitably rendered speechless, Haruka tore into her 'present' only to be immediately disappointed.

"What?!" No car key. "Is this a mistake?"

"No, I wouldn't trust you behind the wheel of a vehicle."

"Thanks."

"So what is contained in your card?"

He was mocking her, she felt sure of it. Talking to her like she was a child. Leading her to the answer without giving it away. Annoying. "Two card keys."

"And one is like Light's?"

" _Yes_."

"Then what might the other relate to?"

"You could just tell me!"

"Or you could figure it out yourself."

Or I could walk out of here and never look back, she thought sourly. Why exactly did she care about him again? Was it too late to rescind her confession?

They were all staring at her, she could feel their eyes. Everyone knew. Whatever it was they were already aware and she felt like an idiot for being so blind, but her aggravation was clouding her judgment. For the life of her she _could not_ understand what the-

She stomped away, toward an elevator and refused to turn even as the door began to slide shut behind her. She was so _stupid_. What else could a card key be for in a place like this?

A loud, long sigh escaped her.

An idiot. She was such an idiot!

Despite those self-depreciating thoughts Haruka had realized what her sort-of-a-gift was. All that remained was to go see it for herself and in spite of her prior irritation excitement began to build as the elevator climbed higher. Once she'd slid her key into the slot the lift had begun it's ascent and she'd known that her guess was right.

One key would take her to the basement. The other to an apartment.

Twenty-three floors later, and at the top of the building, the doors opened. Haruka released a small puff of air as the realization hit: That this would have been L's decision; to put her on the highest floor, in what she assumed was the best of the available accommodations, was exactly the kind of thing the freak would do.

This was his _stupid_ , _weird_ brand of affection and she couldn't help but love him for it.

/~/~/~/~/

Haruka didn't think she was ever going to be able to beat L in the gift giving department, not after this. She would try of course, but what would win out over a furnished highest floor apartment?

Something money couldn't buy. Something she didn't want to give to anyone else. Something he'd actually saved once already.

It was an embarrassing thought, but she couldn't deny the truth. Ryuzaki had, once again, come to the rescue. He'd recognized the direction of Light's plans, probably before she had, and had a counter move ready; not only that, but giving Light a car likely served more than one purpose. As he'd said it was partially a matter of convince, but it would also be a way to keep Light on the move and away from her.

Her brother was about to become the errand boy.

She could only imagine how angry he was, fuming in silence while forced to keep up a facade of gratefulness.

Birthdays had never been made into a large affair within their family. If they were given a gift at all it was something deemed useful, like a new book for advanced study or notebooks for the same purpose. The computers had come when they turned sixteen and were assigned for the practical use of school work.

How many presents had L given her so far? Those flowers, that spoon, but even before that he'd given her a laptop and then another when she destroyed the first.

There was no way for her to pay him back except with _that_ and she wanted to, she couldn't imagine caring about another person the way she cared about Ryuzaki.

This whole apartment thing was more than what it appeared on the surface, even she understood that. This was symbolic. He'd placed her on the top and regulated himself to the bottom. Whether or not he realized this she couldn't say, but it was the root of a new worry. What would he do to keep her safe at the expense of himself?

"What would I do?" she asked the silent room in a whisper.

Step into high speed traffic. Jump in front of an oncoming train. Take a bullet to the head.

Move herself away from his side and pretend she no longer cared.

A familiar pain pulsed through her forehead and she cringed as she dropped to the floor, both hands on her head. Rocking on her heels she fought to see more clearly, but this vision was blurred. It was not the death of a person she saw, but the end of a relationship.

She wasn't going to let him do it.

/~/~/~/~/

Light was predictably furious. His plan had been perfection incarnate, brought so close to fruition and then ruined.

By _L_.

And he could do nothing about it. There was nothing he could say, no obscenity he could scream, no act of violence he could preform. Nothing. His hands were tied, but it was even worse than that.

He had the sinking feeling that Ryuzaki's actions were more than mere coincidence. L had taken Haruka away in the first place and now it seemed that he was hell bent on keeping them apart. Was it possible that he knew?

He could think of no other explanation, but how could that be? He'd not allowed his infatuation to get out of hand, there was no reason for anyone to suspect them.

Unless she'd told L.

No. That was impossible. Haruka had been just as annoyed by the whole display as he was and more visibly so. Even if she regretted their relationship she would never tell someone and he didn't think her capable of hiding something like that from him. Granted they hadn't been physical in some time, but she'd never shown an aversion either. Haruka was incapable of keeping a secret like that.

/~/~/~/~/

After Haruka's departure, with a scowl that was perhaps permanently etched upon her face, L led the way to the cellar meeting room. Truly he couldn't help feeling a little smug and he thought he'd done enough to warrant this hint of arrogance. He'd pulled the rug out from beneath Yagami, Light and the boy didn't even have a solid accusation to pin on him.

No doubt Light had planned for a special night with his sister, but that was something he would work against. It was no longer a matter of right and wrong; this was about jealousy and possession.

The eldest Yagami siblings could not be allowed to form that type of connection. Haruka could very well be damaged beyond repair if she was forced into that situation. He knew she thought she could deal with it, but the emotional harm would be greater than she realized.

"Mori and Matsui will remain here, the other three are to return to the station with Watari and Light-kun should probably go home as he has school tomorrow."

Directives given he wandered away from the group and began the trek to the top floor.

He'd disappeared before any one of the others had a chance to ask questions, but as always they followed the directions of their leader, though there remained an atmosphere of confusion.

Matsuda was the only one to attempt a comment. "Did anyone else find it kind of weird that he–", but the looks on the faces of the his coworkers successfully subverted his unfortunate choice to speak.

Still, those few words were then planted in the minds of those present. In fact each of them found the entire evening strange and for basically the same reasons. L's 'gifts' were practical, but also very expensive. A few were able to push aside the desire to dig deeper into his reasoning with the thought that this was a cultural difference, but Matsuda and the Yagami's had no such luck.

Matsuda couldn't help but question Ryuzaki's actions. Despite all that he lacked in conscientiousness he was neither stupid nor blind and he was beginning to put pieces of this puzzle together. His understanding was hampered by the facts he couldn't find, but he wasn't so reckless that he would go looking for clues that were purposely hidden, not in this case at least. Even so, it was hard _not_ to see what was going on. He felt certain that L and Haruka were in some kind of relationship and judging by the look on the chief's face he'd had the same thought.

Soichiro was reminded of his previous fears that romantic inclinations existed between his daughter and the detective. He'd dismissed the worry at the time and he still couldn't find it within himself to understand how it might have happened, but Ryuzaki's actions were unmistakable. If nothing else _he_ liked _her_. He was paying far too much attention to Haruka for this to be innocent. It was one thing to require her to be under surveillance, but giving her an apartment in this building was something else entirely. They been told that they also had spaces assigned and that offered him some comfort, but she would still be out of sight more often than ever before. Could he trust her? Could he trust L?

Maybe not in this instance.

He was going to have a talk with Ryuzaki.

/~/~/~/~/

She heard the ding of the elevator, but she couldn't bring herself to greet him properly. Instead a demand spilled from lips.

"L! Marry me!"

Haruka hadn't meant to say it that way, acting like a needy brat was probably not the best way to propose marriage, but she wasn't going to take it back or apologize.

Sitting alone had given her time to think and she'd realized that there was never going to be another person on the planet that she could love this way. She was too picky, too difficult to get along with and L was the same, though in different ways. He was The One for her, as sappy and ridiculous as that sounded, and she'd never been the type to beat around the bush. She knew what she wanted and she was going to get it.

The look on his face said it all though. He was shocked, startled into silence by her sudden request; she could see that he was going to have a hard time pulling himself back together so she took up the task of carrying the conversation.

"I mean it," she stood from the step that separated the entrance way from the rest of the apartment. She wondered how long she'd been sitting there. She'd not moved since the last vision, the one she was trying to prevent now. "L, I don't care how we do it, if you use an alias or whatever! I don't care." Standing before him she brought her hands to his face. "Right now. I want to get married right now!" Stamping her foot was childish, but she couldn't help it and immediately after that show of immaturity she kissed him.

Unfortunately he remained in a state of disbelief and not even this show of affection was enough to shock him out of it.

This called for shameful behavior.

She snickered when he jumped back. Apparently putting her mouth to his ear was far enough outside his comfort zone to get a reaction, but she'd actually been hoping to push further than that. Perhaps another time.

"Your request is unreasonable."

She sighed. Ryuzaki had returned.

"I doubt very much that your father would be accepting of the idea. As a matter of fact I'm sure he's become aware that something has happened and he will very soon be requesting my company."

"What, you think he's going to have 'a talk' with you?" She couldn't keep the incredulity out of her voice. "My dad may be the Chief of Police, but he really doesn't notice things like that."

"You underestimate him."

"Ehh...Do you think so?"

He looked to her with suspicious eyes; her demeanor had changed again and she was slowly advancing. L was sure that he was never going to have an easy time predicting her movements. As simple as it was for him to understand the minds of criminals, to see through practiced smiles and counterfeit anger, Haruka's actions always surprised him.

Demanding marriage. Had she guessed that he was incapable of denying her something she honestly wanted? He'd hoped she would remain unaware of that weakness for a while longer. That was a dangerous weapon she wielded and he had no doubt that she would use it without hesitation once she realized it was part of her arsenal.

"Ryuzaki," she was going to try a different angle. "I don't care what my father thinks, okay? I'd want to keep it a secret anyway, only we would know, for obvious reasons." Kira would kill her. "I don't know if you could tell, but getting married wasn't ever really on my to do list. I wasn't against it, but I didn't think I would ever find someone I wanted to be with forever." Confessing her feelings again, even more clearly than the first time, left her breathless. It was embarrassing and exhilarating at the same time. "I want to be with you forever. L," she paused to gauge his level of attention. Wide eyed, perhaps slightly nervous. "To me, forever really means always. If I die and find out there's a way to be with you again I'll do it without a second thought. You're not allowed to leave me, do you understand? I won't let you," she grabbed his arm. "I'll handcuff myself to you and– Well, maybe I won't do that..."

His snort may have been amused; she doubted he was offended.

"Anyway when I say forever I mean it. If you try to leave I'll follow you. If I get lost on the way, if I get hurt, you'll only have yourself to blame!" It was a low blow, but it was the truth and he deserved to be forewarned, just as she had been.

He would have tried to leave her, that was what she'd seen him do. Haruka wasn't going to allow a future like that to come to pass because in those few moments she'd felt a pain unlike any other. It wasn't just the pulsing in her head, it was a terrible ache in her chest, like her heart was struggling to beat.

It was a first. She'd never seen or felt anything like that before, but perhaps it spoke to how deeply her feelings ran. Should Ryuzaki leave she would feel as if _she'd_ died.

L did not doubt that she meant what she said, Haruka was not generally a liar, but this posed a serious complication. He could not allow her to learn his name, not until Kira was caught and executed, and their relationship could not be exposed until that time either. Any legal step they took had the potential to be found out.

"In this case feelings are not to be considered," he spoke bluntly. "We cannot afford to leave a paper trail. Your brother is also suspicious of me, though I don't think he suspects that your loyalties have wavered, but he will undoubtedly be watching."

"Tch." Light, ruining everything he set eyes on. She was going to have to placate him somehow, keep him from growing too mistrustful. L was right, it wouldn't take much to cast her under his suspicion. If they were to legally wed, and Light went looking for evidence of her betrayal, she would likely die within minutes of his discovering the truth.

She'd been running on emotion alone, disregarding the reality of their situation. Nothing could be done until Kira was six feet under.

Another thought occurred to her as L paced away to sit, in his usual strange way, in one of the white armchairs. There was more than one way to bind herself to him. Marriage was a legal process, but being together physically was even more of a tie in her eyes.

Light had not given up on his quest for her virginity, she was sure. His plan had been postponed, but there was no way he'd stop scheming just because L got in the way once. At some point she was going to find herself in a room with Kira and trying to back out would be certain death.

She didn't want to give that to him.

"Okay, you're right. I was being emotional and not thinking of the reality, but I–," She was cut off the ring of his cell phone.

She _knew_ it was important, she knew it was, but she didn't care. So, as he pulled it out of his pocket and made to answer she snatched it away, hit the 'reject call' button and tossed the device over her shoulder.

"You–!"

He would have chastised her had she given him the chance.

/~/~/~/~/

L wasn't sure if he should allow this. Strike that, he knew he shouldn't allow this, but how could he tell her "No" when he craved this intimacy just as much as she did? He understood what she wanted and why she was doing this, her reasons were multifaceted, but he would admit that this was also something he desired for entirely selfish reasons. He wanted to be with her and the idea that Light might take her to bed was bad enough; to think that that Kira would have her _first_ was intolerable.

He didn't know if he would be able to protect Haruka from her brother entirely, but he could keep her somewhat sheltered.

At some point they'd left the living room and later, when he wondered how it happened, he would find the trail of discarded clothing. In those first few minutes of heated kissing he'd not been sure how far she would try to go. He'd though it might have been her way of expressing anger, but when Haruka pulled off her shirt and forced him to his feet he'd had a moment of panic.

For one moment he couldn't help thinking that this wasn't the right thing to do. For one moment he thought of pushing her away. For one moment he considered ending everything.

But then she said, "L, I love you" and suddenly he could hardly imagine being anywhere else with anyone else. This was right. He would never love another the way he loved Haruka and he would never be able to consider staying away from her again.

Now they were in the bedroom and he was infinitely grateful that he'd had the foresight to place a block on the surveillance for this floor of the building. Should an attempt be made to access the feed all that would be seen or heard was static. Though at this point he wouldn't have much cared who was watching. His rational mind had been abandoned, lost to a fog of love and lust.

Haruka was in a similar state, but she thought she might have more of a grasp on reality than Ryuzaki did.

They were supposed to use protection, yet she'd made the conscious decision that she didn't care. If something was created through this act, well, that just put a tight time limit on ending Kira. She could hide a pregnancy for a few months and if a new life was at stake she would work even harder to dethrone the terrible god.

Those thoughts came and went, drifting through her mind at random intervals as their pace moved from frenzied and haphazard to intense and deliberate. Long, deep kisses and soft touches had replaced wild, careless groping and Haruka was close to coming undone.

A shudder racked her body and a small pant broke through when his fingers entered her body. Light had done this before, but it felt so different. The same actions with contrasting feelings behind them. L loved her, Kira did not.

"Ah," just a quiet sound as she tensed around him, her walls clenched and then released. She was left gasping as he hovered over her, waiting for his resolve to cement. She knew he worried, always considered the worst outcomes, but this was right. "L," his dark eyes met hers. "I love you so... So, don't be afraid. This is what I want."

It seemed her words were enough and with one fluid stroke he was fully sheathed within her.

The pain was sharp yet brief; he remained still while she adjusted to the change and when she gave a nod of assent the rocking began.

Haruka lost her sense of decency completely. In the hours to come she would be embarrassed by some of the sounds that came out of her mouth, but in the moment she hardly cared; she wasn't sure what she'd thought sex would be like, a physical pleasure certainly, but this was so much more than that.

She was _one_ with Ryuzaki, connected to him in a way she'd never expected she would be with anyone and she knew that she would never want to be this way with anyone else.

/~/~/~/~/

L gave no explanation for ignoring the phone call that he'd received, however he did tell the attending team members that he'd solved several other cases while absent, which was entirely true. Seven others to be exact. Two missing persons within the Untied States, one missing pet in London and four money laundering schemes in South America.

"It is sometimes beneficial to step away from a problem," he told Matsuda, who seemed to accept the excuse though it was clear he he did not completely believe the reasoning.

Really, it didn't much matter what they thought of his absence as long as they stayed far from the truth.

"A reply tape was sent to Sakura TV, Watari sent a copy of the video."

" _I have found Kira."_

 **Other Facts**

The Shinigami Realm was not always a wasteland.


	15. Misa's Mistake Or

_Chapter 15_

Requiem For Rem

 _ **Disclaimer: I've nothing to do with any Ruby Room Salon & Spa irl, but I do have DNR up for voting on an Inkitt contest! Copy/paste the link in my profile. Do me a solid and give Haruka a 'heart'!  
**_

The second Kira had made a move. Sending another video tape, along with a piece of paper that seemed like a diary entry, s/he claimed to have found the real Kira. Not only that, but s/he wanted to meet. However, this person had refrained from explicitly setting a meeting date or time, but the team agreed that the dates on the journal page were likely a poorly concealed message.

It was decided that certain members would be dispatched to facilitate this meeting and another video, narrated by Light, was aired in response to the Second Kira's request.

Light would be sent to each meeting point, posing as Kira, to be sure that the voice would match in case the second demanded a test.

L announced that Amane, Misa was under suspicion of being the second Kira. After extensive investigation clues pointed to the young model and she would be arrested should she make an appearance during the course of the meet-up. This would be done as quietly as possible and they were coordinating with the police force to decrease the possibility of public outcry.

Haruka was made aware of the proceedings, certain factors anyway, and was asked to watch Amane for any strange behavior during their day out on Saturday.

/~/~/~/~/

Rem was on edge. Misa's life expectancy had made another drop with the sending of the next message and though the shinigami was prepared to step in should this get together go awry, she would prefer to avoid the conflict altogether.

"Misa, I wish you wouldn't do this."

"Rem, don't worry about it! Everything is going perfectly!"

As much as Rem cared for Misa she was not blind to her faults. The blond was too optimistic, too carefree. She lacked depth of thought and her flaws were propelling her toward demise yet she refused to see the darkness ahead.

"Misa if you will not change your mind–"

"I won't," she interrupted stubbornly. "Rem, this plan will work. I have Kira's attention and I know his identity. It's not like I'd waltz out to meet some strange person. If it isn't Yagami, Light I won't say anything!"

So satisfied with herself and yet so blind to the truth. The Yagami boy would never love Misa, in fact Rem would not have been surprised to learn that he was planning her death, but the child rejected anything said against him. Even telling her that her lifespan had shortened did no good.

"I'm sure it's a mistake and if it says that right now it can change! I'm sure Kira will save me if anything is going wrong."

Misa should have known that it was impossible for a shinigami to incorrectly interpret the numbers. Her misplaced faith would have dire consequences.

There was nothing Rem wanted to see less than Misa's death, but there was only so much she could do. Should the necessity arise she would, without a second thought, intervene; however, she only had one chance. She was the final barrier and even though Misa would gain time with Rem's sacrifice there was nothing to be done if she insisted on following a life-threatening path. Rem would no longer be there to protect her and there was no one else to stand in the gap.

"I'll be with him at the Blue Note cafe on Sunday!"

Rem saw the death of the human she loved fast approaching and her grief was unimaginable.

/~/~/~/~/

"I can't believe you're seriously going to miss school tomorrow!" Minna had hold of Haruka's arm and shook it as she spoke. "I mean it's just a study day really, but still!"

Everyone knew. As hard as she'd worked to keep this under wraps it seemed her efforts were for nothing. The entire school was aware that she would be skipping out for a day of pampering with Misa-Misa before hitting up a new club with an exclusive invite.

She'd wanted to avoid this scenario if it all possible. There were too many people already on the borders of jealousy and this had tipped the scale. The situation wasn't dire, no one was bold enough to say anything to her face, but it was an annoyance.

Haruka knew she would have to learn to deal with this type of behavior and thankfully her school days were coming to an end, but she'd tried to delay the inevitable. She'd done enough to give herself some shelter against people taking physical action against her, she was too popular with the public for anyone to risk putting themselves in the spotlight that way, and she would be out and away from her schoolmates in a few short weeks.

Still, she held concerns about some of the more reckless girls in school. Daikoku Private Academy was very strict as far as what types of behavior were permissible, but there would always be those few who toed the line. If any one of them got too full of themselves she might find herself in a bad position.

She needed a buffer.

"Yeah, it's crazy, but you know I was wondering what you're doing on Sunday?"

"On Sunday? Nothing much, why?"

"Well," she dropped her voice to a whisper. Though they were practically alone in the classroom this lunch hour, the weather was nice and most had gone outside to eat, it was still better to be cautious. "First you all have to promise you won't tell anyone, I mean _no one,_ about this."

The three made solemn commitments to keep the secret.

"I wanted to ask if you'd all like to come over and help me figure out how to decorate my new place."

Squeals of excitement and acceptance were quickly hushed and plans were made. Haruka would text each of them the address and at eleven on Sunday morning they would meet.

Their happiness at being included in this was palpable; to be part of an important secret with her was a major sign of friendship. They would stand for her should anyone attempt to do harm to her reputation.

The joy simmered beneath the surface for the rest of the day and by the time school ended Minna, Yuuki and Sakura were already attempting to coordinate a color scheme and making lists of furniture stores that sold classy yet girly, as they'd decided the theme would be, furnishings.

Whatever they decided Haruka was fine with. They did know her fairly well, had a good grasp of her sense of style and she really did trust them with this.

It wasn't that she relied on them solely for their usefulness; if that had been the case there were plenty of other girls who could have filled their roles. They were her friends. She genuinely cared about them, despite her best efforts, and she recognized that if anything were to happen to one of them she would likely see it ahead of time.

That aside their presence would serve another purpose. They would be an alibi.

If Misa was arrested on suspicion of being the second psychic killer Haruka would also have to be questioned. L hadn't said this, but she knew it would come up. She was going to be spending an entire day in the blond's company just before the arrest, if it happened, and it only made sense that she would be called in as a character witness. Though, if her suspicions were correct, things might not be done completely by the books. She had her doubts about the way the system would handle nabbing a Kira; human nature was too volatile for this to be simple. The case would probably be rushed through just to get it over with, to give the police the ability to say they'd done something.

As yet there'd been no perceivable headway and that was leading to complacency by the public. Kira was sort of accepted as an unavoidable unseen force, but if something big happened, like the capture and execution of a person with Kira's powers, it could turn the tide of public opinion. To learn that Kira was actually a person, albeit someone with incredible abilities, was to understand that he was fallible.

She wondered what effect that would have on Light. No doubt he wouldn't equate himself with a fool who got themselves caught, but maybe a seed of doubt would be planted.

She could only hope.

Unfortunately any expectations that had arisen were knocked to the ground that evening when she received a phone call from her brother asking for Amane's number.

His excuse was believable, but she knew better. He told her he wanted to have a word with the person who would accompany her on Saturday, to make sure the girl was trustworthy, and of course she had to pretend to fall for it while tossing in a bit of jealousy. Anything less would have been suspicious.

"You're telling me you want the number of a model to talk about _me_? Somehow I don't think I believe you."

"Are you getting nervous?" He'd sounded so smug.

"Not nervous." Petulant.

She'd felt obligated to tell L and though he made no outward sign of interest she knew it was a clue. She could only imagine what Light had actually told Misa.

/~/~/~/~/

"That's not your phone," Ryuk commented.

"It's disposable."

"Oh, so you'll get rid of it after this?"

He didn't receive an answer. Light hadn't been very communicative lately, except to ask for the name of that detective and of course Ryuk refused. Where was the fun in ending the game a bit early? Things could still change!

Light paid little mind to his shadow, he had other things to be concerned about. Amane was definitely the one making trouble. Her actions toward himself pointed in that direction and now Ryuzaki was suspicious of her as well. If the girl was as stupid as he thought she was, and he hoped he was wrong, she might ruin everything.

The text message he sent her was vague; though he identified himself as Kira no one with any sense would have replied.

The phone vibrated not five minutes later and his worst fears were confirmed. Amane, Misa was an absolute idiot.

"Kira!" Her pitch was shrill. "Don't worry, I won't use your name even though I _do_ know it, but–"

"Are you stupid?" he hissed. He couldn't contain this anger. She was putting everything on the line! "Why would you reply to a number you don't know? I could have been the police!"

"Whhhat?" A whine, near unendurable. He was tempted to hang up on her. "The police don't know anything about me so you don't have to worry! I was really careful–"

"That's where you're wrong," he ground out from between clenched teeth. "The police _are_ aware of your actions and I have some instructions to give you now."

His only consolation upon ending the call was his belief that Misa, as stupid as she was, was not incapable of following directions. She'd been eager to hear what he had to say and was full of promises that she would do as he instructed.

She could not approach him, but the police would likely arrest her on sight. He told her to dress in her usual way, to go quietly with the officials, and then claimed that he would sort everything else out; it wasn't a lie. Above all else she wasn't to speak a word of this to anyone and he'd told her to hide her Death Note. However, he wasn't foolish enough to put much faith in this girl and he'd already prepared for the possible discovery of their supernatural weapon.

/~/~/~/~/

Saturday morning found Haruka in the arms of Amane. They'd met outside the beauty parlor, one Misa swore by, and to Haruka's dismay, Misa's happiness, they were captured by the cameras of the paparazzi.

"Don't worry about it!" Misa told her. "It hasn't happened to you yet and I know its weird at first, but Misa's dealt with it for a year now! It gets fun once the weird wears off!"

The Ruby Room Salon and Spa catered to anyone who could get a coveted appointment and afford the prices, but it was their VIP lounge and the amenities offered that drew Misa to them.

Haruka had never visited a spa before and she doubted having her nails done at a walk-in shop equated to this so she had little to go on, but she was positive that this was truly a luxury salon. The décor was extraordinary in an understated way with a soft pallet of neutral colors and quiet classical music served to set a calming tone.

They were greeted immediately upon entering and were led to a private room that Misa explained was part of the executive area. Everything would be done for them in this space, unless they decided to go elsewhere.

There was two of everything. Makeup stations, hair styling stations, padded seating for pedicures and manicures and massage tables. Two fluffy pale yellow robes and devices that Haruka was ignorant of.

One of those turned out to be a towel warmer and the other a combination facial steamer, aroma therapy contraption.

Any reservations she'd had were soon dismissed. They were treated like royalty and Haruka worried that she would be unable to accept anything less after this. Drinks that were meant to help cleanse the body were brought to them and the spa had a record of Misa's prior requests so a selection of professional chef prepared foods was already available.

As their pedicures were completed tablet computers were brought to them, full of pictures of the clothing available in the boutique. Haruka allowed Misa to direct the decisions here; she readily admitted that she had no idea what would be appropriate club wear. She did let her 'friend' know that she wouldn't accept anything too revealing, but Misa laughed off the warning.

"That's what your brother told me!"

She was surprised to hear that he'd really had brought that up during his call, but she supposed it made sense. Light was covering his bases and she wondered what else he'd said, but it would have been strange to ask. An ignorant younger sister had no reason to be suspicious of her perfect, caring older brother.

So, she let the subject drop and Light was forgotten entirely when the massages started. All in all the day she spent in Misa's company was far better than she'd expected it would be. There were no awkward pauses in conversation, no moments of hesitation and Haruka realized that a friendship with her would have been easy. She was a happy girl, full of pep and funny insights.

By the end of the day Haruka was fervently hoping that her intuition was wrong and that Amane was _not_ the second Kira, but there were too many signs pointing in that direction for her to fall into willful ignorance. Misa's interactions with Light and the fact that he'd taken the initiative to contact her were unmistakable clues. Those points combined with the fact that L had done more of a background check on the woman, which turned up some unplanned visits to her hometown just before the first round of videos were aired, along with hairs found within the packaging of the Kira Tapes, kept Haruka's feet planted firmly on the ground.

Thoughts of that nature stayed with her throughout the evening and into the later hours of the night. The atmosphere of 47 Sky, though it was more intense than Haruka had expected, was not enough to derail her depressing train of thought. She hid her abstraction well and consented to dancing with Misa and another model friend of hers for a couple songs before retreating to the 'Sky Deck', an exclusive space prepared for the special attendees, to observe from above.

Overall the place wasn't bad. She had nothing to compare it to and she doubted she would ever make another appearance, but she could appreciate it's function. It was definitely for the young adult crowd and the live DJ had a good mix of music blaring from the impressive sound system. The strobe lights, smoke and bubble machines added to the atmosphere and massive screens that were used to spotlight dancers seemed to be a hit with everyone present.

More importantly though Misa had convinced her to wear neon. A crop top and short-shorts. Looking down on those on the dance floor she realized that comparatively her outfit was modest, but her father would _die_ if he knew and she was certain that more than a few photographs had been taken when the fifteen guests of honor were given priority entrance. She was dreading her next meeting with him.

Idle thoughts fled her mind when a commotion down below drew her attention.

Her eyes widened. "No way," she murmured.

Other invited guests moved to look out the wall length glass window, gasping as the scene came into focus. One man, dressed all in black, had a gun to the head of a woman. It was impossible to understand his screeching, but did his reasons really matter?

Haruka knew in an instant that this had been orchestrated by Kira. It was too coincidental. Not even eleven and her day out was over, forcibly stopped. Employees of the club were directing them out of the building, police negotiators had already been dispatched and it was of no surprise to her when Light, looking as frantic as any concerned sibling should, spotted her standing with the rest of the displaced party goers under police protection.

He had no trouble pulling her out of the area, more than one officer knew the both of them on sight, and she sent a text to Misa, whom she'd been separated from, to let her know where she'd gone. A reply came almost immediately, so quickly that Haruka wondered if she'd been made aware of this display in advanced, telling her that, _Misa is fine too! My manager was waiting. C u again sometime! This was really fun!_ The message was embedded with sparkling text and flashy images, totally inappropriate considering the circumstances and it should have taken at least a few minutes to create.

One more sign that Misa had taken the role of the second Kira.

/~/~/~/~/

Haruka said little to Light and he didn't try to strike up any particular conversation. He made vague comments and she gave equally unclear replies. Her patience with him was at the absolute limit as they listened to the outcome of the incident on the radio in the taxi. The criminal, who was already wanted on an attempted robbery charge, committed suicide ten minutes after taking the unidentified woman hostage.

This entire fiasco was his doing. That poor woman was probably going to end up in psychiatric treatment over this and for what?

She truly did not know what to do about her connection to him anymore. The last thing she wanted to do was to be physically intimate, but he'd done this much just to put a halt to her night out. In the end the only way to stop him, as far as she could see, was to finally find the evidence that he was Kira. Nothing less would make her, or anyone else for that matter, safe from him.

There was a lot riding on Amane's capture. She was a careless sort of person, even when she intended to be secretive she missed crucial details. If she and Light had access to the same power she'd probably tried to hide it, but her personality would betray her. It seemed to Haruka that Misa would give up clues without even realizing what she'd done.

But, there was little use thinking about that issue. Everything would be decided the next day and she had nothing to do but wait it out. If Misa didn't show up all her suspicions would be for nothing.

The twins parted ways in the lobby. Light disappeared into the lowest levels of the building while Haruka went to the top, praying that her father wasn't one of the men watching the security feed.

/~/~/~/~/

Sakura, Yuuki and Minna arrived right on time the next morning, chattering excitedly as they took the lift to the highest floor.

"I can't believe you live _here_!"

"And on the highest floor!"

"How did you get into this place?!"

She'd rehearsed answers to combine with questions of that nature. Obviously she couldn't tell them the truth, so they needed to hear a believable story.

"First of all it's probably not as expensive as you're thinking, secondly my manager knows the owner of the building and she worked out a contract saying I'd talk the place up in the press. Also, I've been saving pretty much everything I make–" Her planned speech was cut off as the doors slid open and her three companions raced into the apartment.

It was bare bones and she'd left it that way for this purpose. L had said he would leave decoration up to her, claimed that he wasn't interested in that aspect and handed over a translucent credit card. She'd never seen anything like it and refrained from asking questions. She had wondered before where the resources to construct this building had come from and she knew Matsuda had attempted to find the answer, but he'd been ignored. She suspected it had something to do with Ryuzaki's alternate personas and the fees they charged, some kind of backroom government funding was probably also connected. Whatever the case she doubted it was anything technically illegal.

The flat was somewhat furnished, the bedroom had basic furniture as did the living room, but nothing else was there.

"I made a list of everything I need. It's extensive, but we've got all day."

They were overjoyed to be included in this task. Hours passed without the loss of their interest, several items of décor were ordered and at noon they left the apartment with the intent of visiting a new cafe, but the moment they entered the lobby they realized something was amiss.

"What's with all the reporters?" Yuuki asked, eyebrows raised. "Looks like they're waiting for someone."

"Yeah it does," Haruka muttered in response. "And I don't really want to find out who, but..."

"No, no," Minna waved a hand. "We'll go out first, it's not us they want to see. If it's you I'll set them straight, whatever it is."

Her planning had paid off. She'd not misjudged their characters, they were true friends. Of course now she felt obligated to be on the watch for their futures, but that was a small price to pay for the service they were about to do her.

"If you're sure it's alright, but– "

They ignored her attempt to prolong the conversation and exited the building. She watched their movements carefully; it was impossible to hear what was said, but she noticed when Minna began to get agitated.

All three seemed to be arguing with reporters when her cell phone rang with a call from her manager. Manami relayed, with a deeply troubled voice, the story of what had happened earlier in the day to Amane, Misa.

Apparently she'd been approached on the street by a plain clothes officer, eventually she was arrested without much fuss on her part, but before it was over a man had died. He'd approached the scene with a gun, seemed intent on killing Amane as he shouted things about Kira, before dropping to the ground. He'd died of a heart attack.

Haruka could only imagine how much of it had been Light's plan, how much had been L's, but she couldn't speak of those things to anyone at the moment so she acted as shocked as was appropriate, exclaiming her disbelief and discontent. She told Okada of the people outside her building, was advised to avoid the situation and reassured that a statement would be released within the hour from Float.

Her friends returned indoors just as she hung up the phone ranting about the confrontation, but the overall tone was positive. They'd each said their piece, had defended Haruka's honor against 'unfounded accusations' and provided their analysis of her personality.

"My manager called while you were out there," she told them as they rode the elevator again. "She told me about what happened. I just can't believe it!"

"Right, right?!" Minna was still rather excited by the whole exchange. The other two had calmed considerably, but she remained fevered. "How would you know anything about that? It's crazy! They're looking for a story without any ground to stand on! Well, they can _try_. See if I don't get my uncle to represent you when you take them to court for defamation of character!"

She allowed a nervous chuckle to escape. "Let's hope it doesn't go that far. I was told a statement would be released very soon from the agency so maybe that will settle it."

"It had better. If they ruin your billboard you should sue them for damages. This isn't some little thing, this is your whole career!" Her speech continued as they reentered the apartment.

"Anyway, Minna," it was time to redirect the girl's attention. "We'll order from the building's restaurant, if that's okay with everyone?"

/~/~/~/~/

Amane's capture had yielded It. The clue that had eluded them for so long was finally found.

This was kept from the media, but when the man who attempted to murder the model died a black notebook had appeared, seemingly from nowhere at all, and dropped to the ground. It was taken by the task force and was currently in L's possession.

It had strange lettering on the front cover and within, well, there were names. The last entry corresponded to the man who'd died at the scene of Amane's arrest.

"Look into the rest of the names here, find out who these people are. Do _not_ write _anything_ in this notebook. Do not touch it without gloves. Be very careful with it. This could be the evidence we've been waiting for.

"Watari," he turned from those present and spoke into a microphone. "Amane's apartment is being searched?"

"Yes, Ryuzaki, as we speak."

He was left to his own devices when he sent Mogi away to begin searching for information regarding the several dozen names in the notebook. He was forming his own conclusions though. This was a notebook of death. The names contained within would be linked to the dead and he believed it would be found that they all died of heart attacks, if a cause could be found at all. He had the idea that some were very old.

The book itself was strange enough. To have suddenly popped into existence the way it did, with that unreadable label, led him to believe that indeed Shinigami were real and the notebook had belonged to one. It was not of terrestrial origins.

He had other things to consider on top of that, like Haruka's scheme to keep herself as far above suspicion as possible. She was a manipulator, he'd already known that, but it almost staggering to see that side of her personality so fully on display. Yet at the same time this meant she really did trust those girls she'd invited over.

She was dangerous and that was something he'd realized long ago, but it was apparent that knowledge was not enough to keep him from her. It was as he'd suspected: Love was entirely illogical. If he'd any semblance of control he would leave the child, yet it was near impossible to imagine being without her now. They were tied in an unalterable way, forever connected on a level he never thought he'd reach, mostly because he wasn't interested.

In every way the situation had changed. He was now almost certain, near ninety-nine percent, that he knew how Kira committed his murders. Light was in possession of a supernatural weapon, but he had no false hope. The boy wasn't stupid. He'd likely had a plan already in place should something like this happen and his instrument of torture was probably well hidden. Regardless the Yagami house was to be searched once again so he'd sent Light, who'd gained his license after completing the written examination and driving test with perfect scores, to take his mother and sister out. Where they went was up to him as long they stayed away from home until after the dinner hour.

Meanwhile he set to thinking of places to hide a notebook; more specifically places Light would think to hide his notebook.

/~/~/~/~/

She'd managed to fuck it up. L knew about the Death Note, undoubtedly he'd been able to piece together how the thing worked, and Light had given his to Ryuk for safekeeping without giving up ownership; of course he'd been unsure if it would work that way, but it had been a chance he was forced to take. The Shinigami had only agreed to be helpful for a trade involving large quantities of apples.

He was unsure of what happened during the arrest, where the Death Note had come from. Misa had been adamant that she would follow his instructions and, for just a moment, she'd seemed truly surprised when it appeared and then she'd done as he'd instructed and gave up ownership of her Note.

At the very least she would pass the polygraph test. However, with the addition of the unknown notebook there was a distinct possibility that the rules he'd told her to write in _hers_ wouldn't be believed.

There was still a very slight chance it wouldn't be found, wherever she'd hidden it, but he didn't trust her skill in that area.

For now he could only wait and see what conclusions Ryuzaki would draw. His next steps would be dependent on L.

 **Death Note Facts**

The Death Note has a will of it's own.


	16. Final Farewells Or

_Chapter 16_

Resolution For Ryuzaki

The problems presented by Amane's arrest were smoothed over by Float and she suspected that L had a hand in it as well because her statement to the police quickly removed her from suspicion and, when a press conference was held several days after the investigation began, her innocence was made particularly clear. She'd not seen or heard from any reporters on the subject since and that seemed highly suspect to her. She didn't know what Ryuzaki had done, probably paid off someone or something, but she was grateful for it. Mina had expressed a bit of disappointment over the fact that she wouldn't be able to get her uncle involved in a high profile lawsuit, but her dissatisfaction was superficial at best, her complaints made in jest; Haruka knew her friend was glad for her above all else.

As for the issues with Amane she knew nothing more than the public. Misa was being held and the populace was aware that there was strong evidence linking her to the Kira case, but that was it. Whether or not there were proceedings toward a death sentence or life in prison no one could say.

In all honesty she didn't want to know and thought it better to remain ignorant. If she was ever questioned she could speak candidly and truthfully say she didn't have any information on the subject.

For the moment her days had returned to normal. Schooling and work were her priorities; final examination time was nearly upon them, less than a week away, and she was putting as much energy into study as she could spare.

The billboard was to go up on the day of her first exams, the one she worried over the most because arithmetic was _not_ her strongest subject, not by a long shot, and the perfume company had prepared a launch party that she was expected to attend. That was going to make for a hectic day, but she'd resolved to push through it. She'd already informed her manager that she would have to leave by eleven to ensure that she would be able to preform well on her tests.

She really had no idea what was going on with Light. At school he rebuffed her, though not in a way that made her think him upset with her. It was more like he just didn't have the time. That wouldn't have been strange if he was the type of student who needed to spend every spare second studying, but he wasn't. It seemed to Haruka that he was using the exams as an excuse to close himself away in the library whenever possible. She knew he wasn't studying and that meant he used the time alone for another purpose, but she didn't know what. No doubt it had something to do with the things Ryuzaki had done. More than likely he was trying to find a way to end this game without being caught.

But, what would that entail at this point? From Light's perspective L was the real roadblock, but she knew there was more to come even if Ryuzaki died. Light didn't have that information so he'd continue to focus his efforts on killing L, but at this point it didn't seem like the opportunity would arise. No one knew his true name and it was obviously a well guarded secret. She thought Watari must know, but his name was also a mystery. There was no way to dig for information about the two without some kind of starting point and Light didn't have one.

She couldn't see a way for Kira to declare victory under these circumstances.

This wasn't the time for celebration though; there were too many things she didn't know and allowing herself to become preoccupied over it wasn't productive. There was nothing for her to say on the matter to Light or L. She had no insights to give, no dire warnings to impart. For now her role in the case was over. Until Light came to her again, and he'd not seemed to have the inclination, she would have no chance to take a good look at how he'd changed.

From a distance he seemed normal enough, interacting with others the way he always did, but every once in a while she thought she caught a troubled look on his face.

All the feelings she'd tried to bury returned full force; her fear for his fate was not dead. She'd not had another dream of him or any visions at all, so she wondered if her vexation might be for nothing, but something felt wrong. It was different than before, not the kind of 'wrong' she'd recognized when he began pursuing her, but she couldn't shake the feeling that something else was awry.

It almost felt as though he was even less like himself than before, if that was possible, but she couldn't put her finger on the reason. Was it his expression? Maybe. His eyes looked emptier than ever.

Like before she was the only one to notice that something was amiss. Everyone else was too concerned with their own studies and problems to take notice of the way Light seemed to be fading.

Everyone except L. He'd also noticed the change and he had his own suspicions about where this new set of emotions might be leading, but he'd refused to tell her.

"Hmm," she made a face at the thought. She didn't like to allow him to set this precedent, but neither did she think it fair to try and drag something like that out of him. Ryuzaki's reasons, whatever they were, would be sound. She knew he was primarily concerned with capturing Kira and if Light was emotionally unstable it could lead to a mistake; in this instance it might be better for her to do nothing at all rather than risk stepping in. Right now it seemed the natural progression of things would led to the final, decisive win for those on the side of good.

/~/~/~/~/

There was something wrong with Yagami, Light. His attitude had changed yet again, even more fully than before. He'd made the shift from wildly over confident to despondent in a matter of hours.

Where was his homicidal rage? Why had Kira not been active in recent days? Was this part of his ploy to set up Amane, Misa as the only killer? L didn't think so.

The differences were too real.

That perfect child act was just that, an act, and it had always been plain to Ryuzaki that Light had far deeper motivations than he let on. Whether those motives were evil or not hadn't been apparent at first, but knowing what he did now, he had no doubt where Light stood. However, this new depression seemed genuine.

As usual he played it off well enough to keep most from suspecting, but he'd noted a few concerned glances passing between Matsuda and Aizawa. They were the two most likely to notice a change in temperament and their input was valuable. Upon asking them what they thought of Light's recent behavior, separately, they each indicated a vague feeling of concern for the young man.

If L was right Light was now battling himself more so than the investigation team. With the discovery of the Notebook of Death came an understanding of the way Kira killed and that was a giant leap forward. Nothing of the kind had ever been found in Light's possessions, but that meant little. A notebook could be hidden with ease especially if there was someone, like a Shinigami, to leave it with.

As far as Ryuzaki was concerned Light was, with one hundred percent certainty, Kira. Soichiro still refused to accept his conclusion, continually pointing to the remaining lack of evidence.

Another notebook was found within Amane's apartment. It had been well hidden beneath a floorboard, but the search was thorough and it was revealed after a day and a half of combing through the place with every available device.

Misa's dwelling was strange enough on it's own and it seemed to L that she'd been in a more fragile state of mind than anyone had realized. Her obsession with death was all encompassing and she'd made use of some strange blend of religions in her décor. Within her notebook was a list of names that included the newscasters who'd been killed on live television and with that evidence on hand it appeared that the government was trying to fast track her trial. This was not necessarily a good thing and Ryuzaki knew the actual purpose was far from noble. They were hoping to put Kira behind them, to tell the public Kira was dead and throw the supernatural incident into dust bin of history.

He was not very concerned over it; even if they formally ended the Kira Investigation he would continue to pursue Light, but it could serve as a boost to the boy. If he knew the government had backed off he might begin killing again, just with more discretion.

Clearly he'd never expected that his mode of murder would be discovered; that partially explained why he'd been so bold in his killings, but even if he felt invisible, and almost invincible, he should have been more discreet. Light wasn't stupid, far from it, but he'd acted in moronic fashion. Why in the world would he call attention to himself that way? Only a fool would call out the one intent on finding them, only a megalomaniac would possess the traits that Kira displayed.

He'd not been emotionally stable.

This led L to speculate that the Notebooks of Death had more power than simply killing. With careful study of the notebooks he'd decided that there were rules involved, though he did not know all of them, and he doubted any human could have the full knowledge of how the things worked; they were not from this dimension.

Kira'd obviously thought he was well prepared to use the weapon, so he likely knew a lot about the way it worked, but L believed the books were not only physical in their attack. They also wrecked havoc on the psyche of the user.

Haruka had mentioned the changes in her brother, that his more recent actions were opposite to how he'd previously behaved. He'd been focused on joining the police force, had always held himself to a near impossible moral standard and she'd not been able to understand how he'd changed so fully without adding in another factor.

L believed the notebook was the missing piece. When used, perhaps even just once to kill someone who was evil, it began exerting a power over the owner of the book. Light had always wanted to extract justice, but he'd found murder reprehensible. Light had always cared about his twin, but he'd never looked at her with spite and he'd certainly never shown a romantic preference for her.

These alterations combined led Ryuzaki to believe that Light had used the Death Notebook without truly understanding how it worked. Had he known he would not have done it, but he was now changed so completely that he thought nothing of murder, that he sought to dominate his sister and, if his newest set of behaviors were correctly interpreted, that he was contemplating suicide.

Haruka had not yet come to that conclusion and L did not wish to tell her of his suspicions. He could be wrong, though he gave his assumption an eighty percent chance of being correct, and he didn't want to add further stress to her shoulders. While it was impossible for him to mistake the signs of depression and desperation, she could not fathom her brother ending his own life. Despite all the things he'd done to her in months gone by that was not likely to enter her mind as a possibility.

When he visited the previous evening only to find her uncommunicative, surrounded by school books and studying as if her life depended on it, he spoke to her of the sudden differences in Light. She'd agreed that he was changed yet again, but offered no ideas for an explanation.

It seemed to L that she was purposely ignoring the situation and he couldn't blame her for it. She'd been through more than enough heartache, but he wondered if she might have an inkling on some level that she chose to disregard. Of course, she probably also put faith in her own abilities; Haruka would expect to know if Light was going to die.

That was another thing he'd put time into contemplating. The visions she'd described had to do with external forces causing a death, things that could be prevented if she were to interrupt the chain of events, but he doubted suicidal tendencies could be blocked in the same way. It was too subjective. The sufferer could decide to find help or not. They could take medication or not. They might speak of their problem or not. Too much was dependent on the victim and their own strength of will for anyone else to have much impact.

She'd not seen her brother's death again, but that didn't mean it wasn't approaching. In a way it would be the easiest route for all involved; Kira would take himself out of commission and all that would be left was a cold case. L did not doubt that Light would play innocent until the end and beyond, they would never find his notebook and he would remain guiltless for all practical purposes. His life would be regarded as one cut short.

That would be the best outcome for him short of killing his pursuer.

The question was did Yagami, Light feel trapped? Did he feel like he had no way to move forward? The information he needed, Ryuzaki's name, may as well have been buried beneath layers of glacial ice and L could think of no way for the boy to find it out baring another supernatural power he didn't seem to have access to.

L was now awaiting the end of the Kira case and felt almost sure it would come without his needing to lift another finger. Light would orchestrate one final death.

His own.

/~/~/~/~/

Light felt nothing.

His soul was barren and though his heart was beating he almost believed it didn't really exist.

He'd lost. There was no way around it and he thought he should be murderously angry, but he couldn't even muster enough emotion to feel annoyed.

The people around him, what good were they? What had they done for the world? He'd done so much, had made so many grand plans and had advanced the cause of good; why was it they laughed and smiled while he stood still? Why could he only act out a poor imitation of their feelings when he should have been the most vibrant of them all?

They didn't notice. They didn't see that he was a failure and he thought this should bother him but it didn't. He didn't care that they missed what he thought should be obvious. He realized that only a week back they'd aggravated him to the point contemplating their deaths; their frivolous actions and nonsense words had been nothing but an irritation that brought them under his scrutiny and now he _didn't care_.

He couldn't understand this new way of not-feeling, nothing about it made sense. Where was this void inside of him and how had it gotten there?

Though he wondered he didn't worry over it, didn't really want to find the answer. There was no point. Kira would not be the winner in this game. He had no way of finding L's name and he'd _tried._

If anything was enough to awake a bit of emotion it was that thought. The knowledge that he'd done everything he could to find the information he required, but had been unable to locate it, still made him angry. However, that anger did no good. Thinking of it drove him to the brink of insanity, had him desiring to go at the strange man with a knife, but that would do nothing except get him locked in a cell in a psychiatric ward or worse have him put on trial for Kira's killings.

The Eye Deal was out of the question. He refused to cut his life in half for L.

He would not sign his own death warrant that way; despite all the feeling he lacked pride still existed in a diluted form. He was too proud to die at the hands of another. Kira had been loved, revered and feared. He'd been a God and this God would not be killed by some puny, worthless human who'd never done a thing with their lives and never would either. He would not face the shame of dying before his worthless family or the worthless police or the worthless people of the world.

Yes, his family was worthless. Sayu was young and stupid. His mother was old and dull witted. His father was purposely blind and accidentally ignorant. Haruka was...not entirely worthless.

His twin. What would she think if she knew how far he'd fallen? Even now she had an idea of his torment, though he seriously doubted she could ever empathize and she did not know the full extent of it. She had no idea how deeply he'd dug his grave, but Haruka and he were alike. As she'd said she also had a plan for leading the world, but it was different than his and he'd thought her ridiculous. He wasn't sure what he thought of it now.

In the end she'd been right and that was odd for him. He'd always been the victor in that arena; she was too immature and easily angered. Perhaps that was no longer true.

She'd been his lover, but he wondered now if she meant it and found that even that didn't matter. The idea failed to arouse an emotional response.

Ryuzaki had feelings for her, he was sure of it. She would be better off with him, the master in this game and countless others. Light had thought he would triumph over the freak of a detective, but then she'd seen his end, his loss, and everything spiraled out of control. He'd attempted to regain a foothold, of course he had because how could he let go without a fight?, but it was for nothing. Everything he'd done was to be wasted.

The battle was over. Unbeatable Kira had been conquered and His new world would not see the light of day.

Neither would he.

He'd made the choice, the final decision. There could be no coming back from any of this, not even giving up the Death Note would fix his problem. If he did that he would be left without any memory of what he'd done using the Note while still remembering the relationship he'd shared with Haruka.

 _How To Use XXII:_

 _"The individuals who lose the ownership of the Death Note will also lose their memory of the usage of the Death Note. This does not mean that he will lose all the memory from the day he owned it to the day he loses possession, but means he will only lose the memory involving the Death Note."_

His old self, stupidly moral as he'd been, would not be able to live under that weight. The outcome wouldn't change.

She answered on the second ring.

"Light?"

The same. Haruka was always the same while simultaneously always different. How did she do that? He would never know.

It didn't matter anyway.

"I just wanted to say goodnight." His voice sounded hollow even to his own ears. He couldn't force himself to put emotion into this, though he wondered if he should try. Didn't she deserved that much? What could he say that was true?

/~/~/~/~/

"I love you."

Haruka blinked in surprise. What was this about? Nearly eleven o'clock and he was calling her for this?

"I know that, but thanks I guess. I love you, too." This was weird and it felt even stranger. What was he doing?

"Mom said you'd be coming home to tomorrow."

A statement, not like he was asking it it was true. What was he doing?

She shook herself and answered, "Yeah, I'll be there in the morning. See you then, okay?"

"Yes, you'll see me then. 'Bye."

And he hung up.

"What the–" she muttered. This felt ominous and after a moment of allowing concern to wash over her she called L who answered immediately.

"Speak."

Haruka released a huff of annoyance. He was forever on the edge of being rude to her. "Light just called me and he sounded, I don't know, off. Like really. He's doing something, but I don't know what. He didn't say anything that seemed important."

"Whatever it is we'll know soon."

"I suppose so, but–"

"Wait there." He gave his order and then disconnected.

Annoying. Where else would she go?

/~/~/~/~/

He'd been right. Light would end his life and he was going to do it tonight.

L wasn't going to tell her. There was nothing she could do to prevent it and this was the best outcome he could have hoped for. Kira's stint as god would come to a halt, Light would die technically innocent and the things Haruka wanted to keep hidden would never be found out.

She was tapping her foot when he entered her apartment, squawked loudly when he pulled her into the elevator and dug her heels into the ground when they got to the roof.

"It's too cold! What are you doing?"

"I'm not sure."

"Oh great. Well, good for you. You can stand in the chill alone, Ryuzaki. Some of us have things to do, like sleeping. I know you're unfamiliar with that concept, but _I_ have to get up early in the morning and–"

"I do as well. What did Light say to you?"

His redirection confused her, he was too abrupt, but she answered honestly. "He said goodnight, I love you and said he'd see me in the morning."

"Really? Did he say he would see you?"

She thought back to the conversation. "Uh, not exactly, it was more like _I_ would see _him_ , but that's the same thing so what does it matter?"

"It probably doesn't."

"Then why bring it up?" Neither of them were making sense tonight. Maybe it was something in the air. "Whatever. You're both the same, you know that? In too many ways."

"I've thought so, too. If he wasn't Kira I think we would have been friends. I almost consider him one anyway."

He knew she was giving him a look of disbelief, but it was true. He wasn't sure why he felt that way, but the feeling remained though it was inexplicable. It might have been because of Haruka, but he didn't think so.

He supposed he would never know.

/~/~/~/~/

She stood with him for far too long. Despite her complaints about the temperature she was disinclined to leave without him so they stood on the roof, for no good reason as far as she could tell, for nearly an hour before L suddenly decided to return indoors.

He didn't say anything when she exited the elevator, didn't even kiss her, and she glared at him as the doors slid closed, but there wasn't much she could do about it.

Strange behavior all around and she still felt uneasy, but Haruka went to bed without resolving the situation. She was too tired to think on it and decided she would try to find answers the next day.

"Urgh," she muttered thinking of the day to come; L would be speaking with her father. She cringed at the thought. For some reason she didn't think he would lie about this, even though she'd asked him to when he told her of the appointment. It was the reason she was going to spend the day home with her mother, Light and Sayu.

In any event that was a bridge she'd known she would have to cross eventually. The only real worry was Light and what kind of explosion he would have when he found out, but she didn't think L would let it be known by her brother even if he told Soichiro.

On this she would just have to trust him.

/~/~/~/~/

Morning came and Ryuzaki's meeting with the father of his whatever she was began just before she left. He'd made sure there were no weapons to be used and he was relatively confident that he wouldn't be killed during this assembly.

Overall he wasn't uncomfortable with the situation and conducted himself in the way he usually did.

"Ryuzaki, please be honest. Do you have feelings for Haruka?" Soichiro hated this and he felt like it might be better not to know, but this was important. If he had to voice objections he would, though he knew L was already aware of them all. That made it even more difficult. This whole conversation seemed unnecessary, but he couldn't leave these things unsaid.

"Yes."

The older man flinched. That was exactly what he didn't want to hear, but the next answer would be far worse. "And, as far as you know, does she... Does she," he hesitated, but pushed through. "Does Haruka have the same feelings for you?"

She'd demanded he lie if this question came up, as they'd both known it would, but he was against that. Subterfuge would not be profitable in this instance.

"Yes."

As a father this was the worst challenge he'd ever faced, perhaps as a human being. He couldn't imagine going through this again with Sayu at some point, but maybe that wouldn't be as difficult. Surely she wouldn't end up with someone in this line of work, she was too carefree. "Has she spoken of it?" He was still holding onto a thin strand of hope. Ryuzaki thought she felt the same, but he could be mistaken.

"She confessed first."

He sighed loudly and sagged into his seat. Of course she did. That was exactly like her and now he came to the most important part of all.

With his eyes closed, he couldn't stand to watch L answer, he asked haltingly, "Have you two– been," he felt like his pause took an hour. In reality it was hardly noticeable. "Intimate?"

Not profitable to tell a falsehood before, but now was the time to lie. "Of course not."

Soichiro chose to believe it. Whether it was the truth or not he didn't care. For all intents and purposes it seemed true. L's voice hadn't changed, he didn't look embarrassed and they hadn't been acting in a way that suggested they'd... Done things.

He hated to even consider it and silence fell. L had nothing to add, he wasn't about to volunteer information, and Yagami needed time to recover from the ordeal.

The ring of L's cell phone broke the uncomfortable quiet.

Her grief was unrestrained. "I don't know what, what to do..."

"Haruka, don't hang up the phone."

She could hardly get the words out. "Wha– what am I s-supposed to do?"

"Haruka, just–"

" _Why_ d-d-did this have to _ha-happen_?"

He understood and there was nothing he could say except, "Wait for me."

 **Death Note Facts**

There is no way to prevent a death that has been written in a Death Note.


	17. Light's Loss Or

_Chapter 17_

Sorrow For Somebodies

 **A/N: Demons by Imagine Dragons.  
**

She arrived home to orders from her mother.

"Go and get your brother, would you? The food will get cold and he won't answer when I call up to him!"

Though Haruka rolled her eyes she did as she was bid.

"It's really unlike him to sleep late," Haruka muttered as she moved up the stairs. "Hey, Light?" She knocked on his door, but there was no sound from within. "Light, I'm coming in, okay?" The knob turned easily, it was unlocked.

Looking back she would realize that she'd known, even before the wooden barrier was fully open, what she would find. His words from the night before, the tone he used... She'd already thought it strange and though she'd purposely kept her thoughts off that track, the fear had never disappeared.

He was there lying still, looking as if he was still just asleep, but his skin was the wrong color, his chest did not rise or fall, and she knew he was dead.

The tears came instantaneously and her hand moved to cover her mouth.

This was the was the end of Kira's reign of terror, but it was more than that and _this_ was the part she'd tried so desperately to avoid for all those long months.

Light was dead. Her twin was dead.

/~/~/~/~/

She wasn't sure how long she stayed there alone. At some point she closed the door behind her and moved to kneel beside his motionless form on the bed, patting his hair and crying in silence.

It was one thing to know the outcome, another to see it fulfilled.

Haruka wasn't fully herself when she called L; her words were choked, nearly unintelligible when she told him that Light was gone, and it didn't fully register when he told her he was coming, but she had a half thought of how terrible it was for his first meeting with her family to be over the death of the only son.

Somewhere in the back of her mind she noticed that he'd worn sneakers, that he stood at full height, though nothing else about him was different and she sort of appreciated the effort, but really she just couldn't stop crying no matter how hard she tried.

She clung to L, with a grip that put the jaws of life to shame, the moment she realized he was there. It didn't matter that he'd come with her father, who was predictably devastated though he pulled himself back together sooner than she would have thought possible.

Haruka couldn't have known but it was her actions that brought Soichiro out of the haze of horror. He was unsure if it was the right way to feel, but all at once his objections to seeing her in a relationship with the world's greatest detective fell away. It was a jarring enough sight that he was forcefully pushed into dealing with the loss of Light more quickly than he would have liked to, but he supposed it was for the best.

His wife and youngest daughter were still downstairs, asked to wait though it had been near an hour since Haruka had disappeared to wake her brother, and by now they were aware that something was wrong. They had to be told and he would be the one to do it.

Sachiko collapsed to her knees without a sound while Sayu stood in stunned disbelief.

/~/~/~/~/

It was found that he died of natural causes, likely with no hint of pain, as he slept. This brought great relief to his family.

/~/~/~/~/

There was not a cloud in the sky on the day of his burial.

/~/~/~/~/

Nothing of interest was discovered during the sorting of his belongings.

/~/~/~/~/

Soichiro would never allow himself to believe that Light had been Kira. Sachiko and Sayu would never be told of the suspicions that had surrounded the golden child.

 **Other Facts**

The Shinigami know almost nothing about humans.


	18. Epilogue

_Epilogue_

A ridiculously smug smile couldn't be helped.

She knew his name.

She _knew_ his name.

She knew his _name._

"Ha!" she did a sort of jig, brought her hands to her face. His name. _She knew his name!_

Lawliet. He was L Lawliet.

Lawliet was actually his given name, strange thought it was. He didn't know the full story, but he supposed his mother either hadn't cared enough to give him a proper name or lacked the mental capacity to do so. It seemed the surname, L, was also false because he'd done as much research as possible and could find no connections. He wasn't bitter and she tried not to be either.

The boy she'd seen in the second to worst dream she'd ever had, almost a full two years ago now, was called Near. She didn't know his actual name and didn't think she ever would. It didn't matter to her one way or the other, she liked him regardless.

And Mello too, though she suspected, and L did as well, that _he_ liked _her_ a bit too much. He knew full well he didn't have a chance, but that seemed to have no bearing on his actions.

When she'd first met him he'd accused L of loosing focus, called him weak and all manner of names with many expletives thrown in for good measure, but after a week he'd retreated and five days later he confessed his own failing to Watari who told L who told her. She thought it a bit funny and bit depressing, but mostly it was fine.

Most things were fine.

Her career had plateaued and she was _fine_ with that. Work was consistent and she now had the ability to be more discerning about the jobs she took. Downtime was easy to schedule and her finances were all in order.

Her family was also _fine_ , all things considered. Grief no loner reigned supreme and lives were moving forward, but she doubted they would ever fully recover from the loss they'd suffered. How could they be expected to? It was impossible.

One thing was better than _fine_. Her life with L was fantastic in ways she hadn't known were possible. He had married her, though it was nothing extravagant and the public was unaware, but it was more than enough for her. His love was incredible in every way, _he_ was incredible in every way. Weird, but in an amazing manner. Also sometimes annoying and irritating and bothersome and she occasionally wanted to chop his head off, but in the big scheme of things she loved him and that love kept him alive despite all of his numerous imperfections.

He was still a detective, three detectives, but there had yet to be a case similar to Kira's and she fervently hoped there would never be one either. One family's loss was bad enough; it didn't need to happen to someone else.

She rarely traveled with him, but he hardly left Japan anymore. Most of the things he did could be accomplished with little effort on his part, he wasn't above having others do most of the real work, and as long as the cases were solved it didn't much matter where he was or who gathered the intel.

Haruka was content. She'd done her best to put away her sadness, though she didn't think it would ever leave entirely, and all signs pointed to a calm life from this point on.

Those were her thoughts as she walked along a dirt pathway, alone, in the middle of the night. Her light, white dress was warm enough as the spring heat was unexpectedly high and she would return before her twenty minute break was over. This shoot was for clothing line with an interesting release plan. It was a collection for this summer, but it had been announced with only a couple weeks until the official start of the season. Buzz was high.

She didn't realize she'd been followed until she heard a mindless laugh directly behind her.

Whirling around Haruka quickly assessed the situation. She was without her cell phone, she had no weapon and this creep, whoever he was, looked certifiably insane. She had no idea who he might be, but his intentions were obvious.

Dirty and grimy in every possible way the man appeared young, maybe in his early thirties at the latest, and he held a gun.

"I've been following you," he whispered as he took an unbalanced step forward. She wondered how she'd not heard him before, he looked drunk. "Always, always, always following you."

Of all the things that had scared her in her life this man was giving the rest of it a run for the money.

"And I–" he broke off suddenly, his eyes widened, and clenched a fist at his chest. Over his heart.

She waited until his body hit the ground to jump over it and run, screaming as she went, back to the group of workers.

/~/~/~/~/

"He just died," she told L as he held her on his lap. He'd not let her out of his grasp once she'd returned. "Heart attack, bam! Body fell."

He had his suspicions, but–

Her shriek of terror forcefully pulled him out of his thoughts and he jumped up with her when she launched off the couch.

"What the _fuck_ is _that_ and where in the hell did it come from?! Lawliet!"

It was a notebook, similar to the ones he'd seen before, but this one had English lettering and it read, 'Death Note'.

"Don't touch it!"

He ignored her order and swiftly opened the book to find multiple pages of rules and then came the names. _So_ _many names_ and he recognized them all as his eyes fell upon them. The criminals who had died by Kira's hand and along with names many had a written cause of death, times included.

"What? This– But, it's..."

He'd never told her what he'd discerned and she'd never asked. "This is the weapon Kira used. Two others were found. One appeared out of thin air when Amane, Misa was arrested and the other was hidden within her home. I'm absolutely certain that my conclusion is correct."

She peered over his shoulder, watched as he turned page after page, staggered at the number of names within. This was impossible, yet it made perfect sense if she disregard the fact that it had come from some other world, some place where a thing like this could be created.

The last name contained was Minamoto, Haguchi and he was the man who'd tried to harm her.

The second to last name was Yagami, Light.

 **Author Fact**

I frickin' love fanfiction.

 **Fanfiction Fact**

This one is DONE. Duces.

 **Another Fact**

The sequel is coming. Just like winter.

 _Super Short Summary:_

 _What happens to a shinigami who has given their life for that of a human? Haruka is about to find out._


End file.
